By Roy Kasten
By Kris Wernowsky
By Chaz Kangas
By Joseph Hess
By Julie Seabaugh
By Mike Appelstein
By Rachel Brodsky
By Kelsey McClure
Australia's Little River Band may very well be the most lyrically challenged group now making the nostalgia-circuit rounds. To wit, consider the following lyrics from LRB's 1979 smash "Cool Change": "Well I was born in the sign of water/And it's there that I feel my best/The albatross and the whales they are my brotherzzz."
Oh yeah, albatross -- wassup, bro? Come on. Anyway, verbiage don't matter, because LRB's silky, melodious Air Supply-on-speed power ballads keep the cup more than half full. Like so many marginal dino-rockers, the current incarnation of the LRB includes only one member who contributed so much as a guitar lick to the band's half-dozen-or-so hits in the late '70s, when the softies managed to land prime gigs opening for Santana and Fleetwood Mac.
The band is touring a gaggle of state fairs and such behind its two new CDs (one live and one studio), but fuck that -- go out and buy a used copy of the original lineup's Greatest Hits. If, by the second spin, you aren't snapping your fingers to "Reminiscing" and belting out "Lady" in the shower, well, you just aren't a connoisseur of über-cheesy ear candy, friend.
Opening are the Well Hungarians, whose phenomenally witty moniker is the envy of the newer factions of Seattle's post-grunge scene.