"Don't make me pull this car over; stop wiping boogers on your brother, keep your hands to yourself; stop breathing on your sister." If your idea of family fun on a road trip doesn't involve listening to these statements in an endless loop, a trip to Trout Lodge fits the bill. About an hour-and-a-half south of St. Louis, this YMCA resort offers lots of activities for your glued-to-the-sofa kids. In the summer, there's swimming, paddle boats, canoeing and sailing. If the closest your family gets to water is watching SpongeBob SquarePants, then there's always hiking, tennis, volleyball and archery. And if your idea of creativity involves more than passing gas on command, you'll find an outlet in the arts-and-crafts seminars. An overnight stay won't bust the kiddies' college fund, and you won't have to hear "Are we there yet?" a million times before you arrive.