That's Just Nasty

What's a little statutory rape between R. Kelly and his fans?

And even the most intense R. Kelly fan also has to wonder about his appetite for self-destruction. "Osama bin Laden is the only one who knows what I'm going through," Kelly actually said in a recent interview in Blender. No, really. For the record: Osama bin Laden is responsible for the most horrific terrorist attack in American history. R. Kelly allegedly pissed on a kid on tape. Can't really compare the two, can ya? If anything, he has more in common with Bill Clinton; like Clinton, Kelly appears to take masochistic joy in nearly destroying his image -- all for kinky sex.

But all of that is moot now. All that matters now is that Kelly is back with his "best of" collection, The R in R&B, with more albums on the way. But no matter how much you may get into his jams, no matter how much you may groove to "Bump n' Grind" or "Sex Me" or that damn song he did for Batman & Robin, this question has to burn in the back of your mind: Did this muthafucka really pee on a fourteen-year-old girl on camera?

Joe Rocco

You can't really enjoy looking at anybody's crotch when something like that has seeped into your cranium.

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