Week of September 29, 2004

Perhaps the fact that Shandi claimed to be from Florissant has nothing to do with why Mr. Norman's friends are laughing at him. After reading some of his quotes, I would imagine Rodney usually does a pretty good job of embarrassing himself without anybody's help. If the city's economy is really so bad that he is going to throw fits over something as trivial as this, then maybe he should move to a different city.

Someday when I am famous, I am claiming to be a Canadian.
Jimmy D. Fuller
Wood River, Illinois

What Would Harry Do?
When in doubt, punch him out: When our traveling pilgrim from Kansas was informed that he was carrying an illegal weapon into the Arch, he should have replied, "No, I don't have an illegal weapon -- it's a pocketknife and Christmas gift" [Malcolm Gay, "Arch Nemesis", May 19]. Then he should have grabbed the security guard by the shirt and decked him. While the licensed thief was lying on the ground, our pilgrim should have added, "Go ahead, punk -- make my day."

Dirty Harry was the answer to this type of McCarthyism-like activity that now is being conducted throughout our land. Big Government has its bulldogs out in force these days, and the new J. Edgar Hoover is having a heyday with our civil rights and privacy.

A bureaucratic solution to the pocketknife incident would be Concealed Pocketknife Registration, just like other privately owned hand weapons. Of course, some witch-hunting legislator would have to write up an amendment to the concealed-carry law in order for this to be a voting issue put to the general public.

What would Dirty Harry do if he were around today? I fear for common justice's future with all of this "terrorism" paranoia since 9/11, and the full rein given to the security personnel violating our privacy. Like our pilgrim, "Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore."
Paul Cameron
Ste. Genevieve

Enter the MeatGina
Parental guidance suggested: Your cover photograph on the June 9 issue is outrageous and insulting. Unless of course you have now become Our Own Oddities for the Sexually Immature. Really, Tom Finkel, I know your dad and this makes me want to ask him what the hell your problem is. Don, are you listening?
Jim Motto
St. Louis

Street Squawk
Now tell us how you really feel: William Stage, you are such an asshole. "Is Saddam guilty?" [Street Talk, July 21] Ask the millions of people he butchered who are lying in some fuckin' sand-covered hole. What kind of fuckin' moronic question is that to be asking these empty fuckin' heads? You are guilty of being a fuckface, William.
Chris Crusciel
Creve Coeur

Porn to Lose
Cool, Earl! We were shooting for dotterel! My comments about last week's horrible front page ["Ron Jeremy in Rug Burn," August 4]: Brainless, dazed, deficient, dense, dim, dodo, doltish, dopy, dotterel, dull, dumb, dummy, foolish, futile, gullible, half-baked, half-witted, idiotic, ill-advised, imbecilic, inane, indiscreet, insensate, irrelevant, irresponsible, laughable, loser, ludicrous, meaningless, mindless, moronic, naive, nonsensical, obtuse, pointless, puerile, rash, senseless, short-sighted, simple, simple-minded, slow, sluggish, stolid, stupefied, thick, thickheaded, trivial, unintelligent, unthinking, witless, waste of time, pathetic, ugly, stupid, sickening, not worth using as toilet paper, trash, skin crawl, cringe.
Earl Sigoloff
Creve Coeur

Most Hated Men
Buttmunch writer, pedophile editor: Hey, Shit for Brains, I notice you didn't list any Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd or Who members [Mike Seely, "The Ten Most Hated Men in Rock," September 1]. That's about the only thing you got right.

You've obviously got issues. What the fuck happened to you, boy? Were you dropped? Did your older brothers flog your ass with LP versions of Back to the Egg when you were a child? You're obviously a commie-pinko, and anybody who went commercial is now a sellout in your eyes? Get a grip, buttmunch. Stick to critiquing your genre -- whatever the fuck that might be. It obviously isn't rock & roll. Friggin' Pet Shop Boy lover. You suck! And your editor is a pedophile too, for letting you publish such tripe. Die, loser!
Pablo Smiles
St. Louis

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