If cleanliness is next to godliness, then where does a roasted pig land on this scale? Surely, one of the world's most perfect foods must be pretty close to the big guy in the sky -- but if not, at least this essence of melt-in-your-mouth perfection will be very near to where some try to hang out with God: at the Cathedral Basilica of St. Louis (4431 Lindell Boulevard; 314-373-8200 or www.cathedralstl.org), of course! This weekend the church hosts its Cathedralfête, complete with a pig roast, and confidential to any vegetarians who have read this far: There will also be non-meat foods like pretzels and funnel cakes (relatively holy-seeming, too) at this all-day festival (10 a.m. to 10 p.m.).
Anyway, enough about the eats; the yearly Cathedralfête celebrates the Feast of St. Louis with more than just belly bounty. Attendees also can hang with some clowns, peruse the artisan booths, feel God through the Smash Band (OK, that may be stretching it a bit), and cold chill in the beer garden or at the Ted Drewes stand (oops, more food!). But while you're outside at this massive churchstravaganza, there's a little bit of fun happening inside, too. The cathedral offers tours of its must-see stunning interior, which features the world's largest mosaic collection. You know, it would be a shame to see any of those 41.5 million pieces of glass gummed up with your festival fingers, so please leave the pig outside and keep your hands to yourself! Remember, God is watching. -- Alison Sieloff
A Clean Race
The soapbox derby rolls through U. City
The spirit of soapbox racing is in the do-it-yourself, somethin'-from-nothin' creation of your own mutt car. The University City Annual Soapbox Derby celebrates this spirit at 10 a.m. at the corner of Canton and Eastover avenues. Drivers ages five to fourteen can register for free by calling 314-862-4306, extension 8771 (helmets are required for all racers); spectators are also free, and everybody is welcome to adjourn post-race to the Heman Park Community Center (975 Pennsylvania Avenue) for a picnic and free school-supply distribution. Those pencils, paper and rulers may come in handy for drafting a new ride for next year's race, or analyzing exactly why the wheels fell off this year's model. -- Jedidiah Ayres
This weekend, the Weekend of Festivals, proves that a party without Smash isn't a party at all. Seriously, his band performs at Cathedralfête one day (see "Fêtes of Strength?"), and then today, he's the parade marshal at the Bevo Day parade -- what a guy! If you'd like to have a smashingly good time all weekend, join the ubiquitous bald-headed St. Louisan at the intersection of Morganford Road, Gravois Avenue and Delor Street at 11 a.m. for his procession. And then sit tight for an hour: From noon to 3 p.m., the Smash Band rocks Bevo Day (which goes into the night).
But if spending the day with Sir Smashington isn't your thing, you can always check out the "Bevo Day Car, Truck & Motorcycle Show," the flea market and craft fair, and most important, the nearly one ton of brats on the grills! Now, that's a lot of brats -- but be sure not to miss some of the Bosnian foods served up as well; it's time to broaden your festival food horizons! For more information on Bevo Day, call 314-352-0141 (and for more information about Smash, visit www.smashband.com). -- Alison Sieloff
You reach a certain point in your life, and you realize how many women you know who have been affected by cancer, and it's depressing. Instead of giving in, do something about it -- even if it's a small something, like watching the Lady Billikens soccer team take on the gals from Oklahoma at 7 p.m. at Robert R. Hermann Stadium (adjacent to the Olive parking garage at Olive Street and North Compton Avenue; 314-977-4758 or www.walkforwomen.org). Tickets for the match are $4 to $6, and proceeds benefit the AMC Cancer Research Center's Walk for Women. -- Paul Friswold