"Call heads, call heads, call heads."
St. Louis: First in gonorrhea, second in chlamydia and last in the National Hockey League
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Joe Girardi, recently hired to manage the Marlins, was unavailable for comment.
Unreal confirmed that tentative plans call for a privately funded ballpark on the East St. Louis riverfront south of the Casino Queen, to be named Benson DuBois Commons at Unreal Grounds. The Marlins will be rechristened the St. Louis Browns, reviving the golden years of the mid-twentieth century when the Gateway City was "First in Booze, First in Shoes and Last in the American League."