It's August, and you've been to exactly zero county fairs. What is wrong with you? Don't you like livestock contests, corn dogs, carnival rides and/or the panorama of the human condition that a fair provides? Well, if you need extra enticing, head west toward the Washington Town & Country Fair (1400 North Park Drive, Washington; www.washmofair.com) for five days of entertainments both bucolic and uptown. From Wednesday through Sunday (August 2 through 6), the T&C Fair offers all of the above delights and so much more. Today, for example, you can experience the reptilian wonder of the Swampmaster Gator Show at noon, a Garden Tractor Pull at 3 p.m. and the slapstick comedy of a 7 p.m. Pig Chase. And this is just one day! Friday night at 9 p.m. Heart plays; you know, Ann and Nancy Wilson? "Barracuda"? Ye gods, you'd have to be made of stone to ignore this fair. Tickets range from $8 to $20 depending on which day(s) you attend, but kids younger than five get in free every day.