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Week of February 1, 2007

Because I Said So. (PG-13) Reviewed in this issue. ARN, CGX, GL, J14, KEN, MR, OF, RON, SP, STCH, STCL, TS12

Blood and Chocolate. (PG-13) There's no official rule that says werewolf movies have to be boring, but it doesn't seem like anyone has tried particularly hard in a long, long time to make them anything but. Needless to say, Blood and Chocolate does not buck the trend. Looking about as lethargic as the viewer is likely to feel, Agnes Bruckner goes through the motions as Vivian, a Hungarian-American werewolf in Bucharest, inexplicably falling for a dumbass comic-book artist named Aiden (Hugh Dancy), who looks more like a boy-band refugee than your typical geek. Were one able to muster up any kind of energy, there's plenty to laugh at, from the fact that the head werewolf (Olivier Martinez) lives in an absinthe factory, to the circa-1980 transformations via camera dissolve, and the pathetic attempts at faking the martial-art-du-jour, Parkour. At one point, Aiden says to Vivian, "If you cared a goddamn thing about me, you'd have left me before we ever met!" And if you care a goddamn thing about your evening's entertainment, you'll walk out of this howler before you ever buy a ticket. (Luke Y. Thompson) CGX, J14, MR, OF, RON, STCH, TS12

 
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