Sporting News: Mixed martial arts proves the end is near, and Pujols isn't going anywhere

FEATURE, MARCH 18, 2010
THE END IS NEAR
And mixed martial arts is proof: I am writing in regard to your article on MMA ["Justin Time," Keegan Hamilton]. What a bunch of goddamn hoosiers. I doubt that kid is smart enough to appreciate the irony of promoting Jesus while kicking the shit out of people. The fact that this kid's big dream is to be an MMA fighter is proof positive that his mom has failed him, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised, since she married a guy whose sideburns form a mustache.
JW, Richmond Heights, via the Internet

DAILY RFT, MARCH 16, 2010
MAN OF FEW WORDS
Like to get to know you: I would like a chance to meet this "person" face to face ["Hannibal Man Accused of Stomping Dog to Death," Chad Garrison]. It would be a very short conversation mostly consisting of: Please stop hurting me.
Eric Shoemaker, via the Internet

DAILY RFT, MARCH 16, 2010
DEAR GOD, CRUSH TEXAS
But spare Austin: God, step on Texas ["So How Will Texas' New Ultra-Conservative Interpretation of History Affect Missouri?" Aimee Levitt]. Really, just squish it — like an ant. Except Austin. May Austin miraculously avoid being squashed by fitting perfectly into a deep section of God's shoe tread. Or sandal tread, if he really does wear Birkenstocks like all the hippie imagery shows him to.
Liberal Nutcase, via the Internet

DAILY RFT, MARCH 16, 2010
LA RUSSA HAS RIGHT TO BE PRICKLY
ESPN story on Pujols-Howard swap was bogus: All the past friction between La Russa and the media seems to have distracted Mr. Conklin from one simple fact, that Tony is right ["The Ever-Prickly Tony La Russa Grows Pricklier by the Day," Ellis E. Conklin]. The ESPN story was complete bullshit that never should have seen the light of day. It was a non-story, no fact-checking was done, and no attempt was made to get comments from the Phillies or the Cardinals before releasing it. Terrible journalism, and Tony had every right to call ESPN out for it. ESPN appears to have no standards at all.
Fred, via the Internet

ESPN shows hindsight: Well, we're not Boston or New York, so when ESPN does their stories on St. Louis, the best they can do is pull something out of their collective asses.
Jeff, via the Internet

GUT CHECK, MARCH 16, 2010
BEER TALK
Lovely day for a Guinness in Ireland: Guinness tastes entirely different in Ireland. And anyone who says otherwise hasn't experienced the real thing ["Go from Guinness Zero to Guinness Hero in 10 Easy Steps!" Dave Nelson]. Apparently that includes the author of this article.
Craig, via the Internet

Nope, it tastes just the same here: As an avid Guinness drinker, I must say that as long as it's poured correctly, Guinness tastes the same in the U.S. as it does in Ireland. I've spent a lot of time in both countries. For some reason, people love spreading this lie. I think people just like to pretend they know something about something.
Mike, via the Internet

DAILY RFT, MARCH 11, 2010
MAD AT METROLINK
Bad system, especially at night: I'm all for mass transit ["What Are We Supposed to Do About All Those MetroLink Freeloaders?" Ellis E. Conklin]. My inability to drive makes it a necessity. But MetroLink is horribly managed. If they want to know why people only grudgingly support them, I'd say nighttime safety and customer service would be two areas to seek improvement. If they get their tax increase, I hope some of it goes to security guards on platforms and trains. Having stoned teenagers bellow in your face on the ride home gets old after the first week.
Ray Deluxe, via the Internet

DAILY RFT, MARCH 11, 2010
SLOW BURNS
Amazed John Burns is anti-Prop A spokesman: Thanks for reporting this ["John Burns: Brains Behind Anti-MetroLink Campaign Is a Well-Connected Tea Party Activist," Ellis E. Conklin]. I still find it amazing that the Tea Party would elevate John Burns to a leadership position after he went out of his way to disrupt an LGBT rally. They should be putting a brown paper bag over his head, not making him a spokesman for their campaigns or an emcee for their rallies.
Adam, via the Internet

 
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