The 2011 Unreal News Challenge

The 2011 Unreal News Challenge
Dan Zettwoch

The year 2011 was about the 1 percent versus the 99 percent. The 1 percent have it easy. They float high above the recession. They've somehow avoided going to jail for their crimes. The 99 percent are the rest of us, just regular working stiffs trying to get by. Some of the 99 percent here in St. Louis staged an occupation in order to teach the 1 percent a lesson. The remaining 98 percent continued with their regular preoccupations and didn't have to sleep in tents.

This year's Unreal News Challenge reflects the new dichotomy. Precisely 1 percent of the questions — the very first question, in fact — are as easy as life on a Wall Street banker's salary. As for those 99 percent, some may seem trivial, some may seem vile, some admirable. But they were all part of real life here in St. Louis in 2011.

OFFICIAL RULES: As always, there are no rules. Except one: You'll have to arrange to come to the RFT office in person to claim your prize. Um, make that two: Only one entry per household. Oh, and you have to supply a real name and phone number where we can reach you in the unlikely event that you win. If there's a tie, we'll come up with something. And, you know, void where prohibited and all that.

So answer the following questions to the best of your ability. We'll publish the results in a week or so.

Editor's Note: Put your pencils down. The test is over. Look for the answers and winners shortly.


1. Which team won the 2011 World Series?
A. The Chicago Cubs.
B. The St. Louis Cardinals.
C. The Texas Rangers.
D. The Detroit Tigers.

2. This past fall Washington University hosted an art installation of ten little huts called sukkahs to celebrate the Jewish holiday of Sukkot. What was the exhibition called?
A. I'm Gonna Git You, Sukkah.
B. Sukkah on This.
C. Sukkah City.
D. Hopeville.

3. Which was the first business in St. Louis to receive a citation for violating the city's spanking-new smoking ban?
A. The Missouri Athletic Club.
B. The Lumière Place Casino.
C. Pappy's Smokehouse.
D. Beffa's.
E. The Loading Zone.

4. Which of the following was not one of the rules St. Louis City officials imposed upon the homeless camp Hopeville?
A. No drugs or criminal activity.
B. No drunkenness.
C. All members of the opposite sex must be out of the tent by midnight.
D. People living in encampments must cooperate with police, the health department and the fire department at all times.

5. What reason did St. Louis Rams coach Steve Spagnuolo give for firing long-time equipment manager Todd Hewitt in January?
A. "We've decided to move in a different direction."
B. "You don't fold socks properly."
C. "You load the team plane too slowly."
D. "We suck, and it's all your fault."
E. "Kroenke said that either I go, or you go."

6. What band canceled its LouFest appearance owing to concerns about Hurricane Irene?
A. The Roots.
B. The Hold Steady.
C. Cat Power.
D. The Weathermen.

7. What happened after parents left a sleeping baby home alone in the town of Grain Valley, east of Kansas City?
A. The family dog courageously headed off a home invasion, trapping a prowler in the basement.
B. The baby spontaneously combusted.
C. The baby logged into the parents' E*TRADE account and shorted Lee Enterprises stock, amassing a profit of $22,000.
D. The family ferret gnawed off seven of the child's fingers.

8. Which noted vegetarian/vegan was spotted in 2011 eating barbecue pork ribs at Pappy's Smokehouse?
A. Bill Clinton.
B. Natalie Portman.
C. Prince Fielder.
D. Paul McCartney.

9. How did Mark Twain scholar Alan Gribben propose updating The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn for the 21st century?
A. By giving Huck and Jim Jet Skis to replace their raft.
B. By ending the novel with Pap Finn being jailed for child abuse.
C. By changing the word "nigger" to "slave."
D. By making Jim an undocumented migrant worker rather than a runaway slave.

10. The results of the 2010 census, released in February, brought bad news: The City of St. Louis had lost 29,000 residents since the 2000 census. The new official number of residents, 319,000, is the lowest in 130 years. Still, some city neighborhoods showed growth. Which area posted a population increase of 329 percent since 2000?
A. Downtown.
B. Cherokee Street.
C. Old North St. Louis.
D. Tower Grove East.

11. When J.J. Ward began showing signs of having overdosed in Tavis D. Doyle's East St. Louis crack house, how did Doyle respond?
A. He administered CPR on Ward and called 911.
B. He put frozen meat down Ward's pants.
C. He gave Ward an injection of adrenaline to the heart.
D. He offered him an immediate refund on his purchase.

12. Which St. Louis-area charity was chosen to benefit from the fruits of actor Gary Busey's business acumen on Celebrity Apprentice?
A. The Center for Head Injury Services.
B. Sunshine Ministries.
C. Greater St. Louis Area Council of the Boy Scouts of America.
D. Starkloff Disability Institute.

13. Which restaurant that closed in St. Louis during 2011 had the shortest lifespan (approximately four weeks)?
A. Adobe Reds.
B. Gyroad Rage.
C. Crostini Restaurant & Lounge.
D. Las Brisas.

14. Which of the following was not an actual bill proposed in the Missouri Legislature this year?
A. Makes it a crime for doctors to perform surgery or any other medical procedure while drunk.
B. Repeals all existing child-labor laws.
C. Requires that all Missouri driver's license tests be administered in English.
D. Allows more people to carry guns into the Capitol.
E. None of the above; all of these bills were proposed.

15. According to the St. Louis County Medical Examiner, what was the official manner and cause of the December 2010 death of August Busch IV's girlfriend, Adrienne Martin?
A. A broken heart.
B. Accidental oxycodone intoxication.
C. Food poisoning from a bad batch of Chelada, an Anheuser-Busch/InBev product that combines Bud Light and Clamato.
D. A cocaine overdose.

16. Where did St. Louis mayor Francis Slay spend the Great Snowpocalypse of 2011?
A. On an eastbound train from Albuquerque, after his flight home got canceled.
B. At his desk in city hall, where he had vowed to remain until all danger had passed.
C. In a bunker in his back yard, where he'd laid in a kerosene lantern, a butane stove and several hundred pounds of ramen noodles and canned food.
D. On the beach in Montego Bay.
E. Blogging away at mayorslay.com.

17. What convention deeply offended residents of Fairview Heights this past spring?
A. Ecto Con (a Ghostbusters tribute from the people who brought you the Bishie Con yaoi convention).
B. Bouchercon (mystery and crime fiction).
C. Beat Me in St. Louis (sponsored by the BDSM club, STL3).
D. National Taxidermists Association.

18. What use has University of Missouri researcher James Perfield found for the seeds of the bastard poon tree?
A. Increasing male potency.
B. Reducing belly fat.
C. Increasing longevity.
D. A super multivitamin.
E. Improving the odor of flatulence.

19. In March the city of Hazelwood busted "a high-volume commodities business" two residents were operating out of their home. What were they selling?
A. Knitted winter hat and glove sets.
B. Cupcakes.
C. Girl Scout cookies.
D. Meth.

20. Which of the following films starred former Parkway North science teacher Tera Myers, a.k.a. Rikki Anderson?
A. Anal Cravings 13.
B. In Through the Out Door 7.
C. Neither.
D. Both.

21. Which of the following was retained from the original Prop B when Governor Nixon signed the Canine Cruelty Prevention Act into law in April?
A. Dogs must be fully examined by vets instead of just looked at.
B. Owners of dog-breeding facilities can no longer stack their animals' cages.
C. Any facility housing more than 50 dogs must use Purina products exclusively.
D. All dogs must have at least 30 minutes of exercise per day once they turn one month old.

22. Washington University invited Bristol Palin to speak and then rescinded its invitation. What was to have been the topic of Palin's speech?
A. How to kill and field-dress a moose.
B. Abstinence.
C. The need for better sex education in our schools.
D. Why Levi Johnston is a total douche.
E. How to profit from your famous parent.

Match the local sports personality with the reason he was arrested (though not necessarily charged with a crime) in 2011:
23. Mizzou football coach Gary Pinkel.
24. Former NFL running back Laurence Maroney.
25. Cardinals broadcaster Dan McLaughlin.
26. Former NBA player Darius Miles.

A. Drinking and driving (his second such arrest).
B. Trying to get a loaded gun past security at Lambert St. Louis International Airport.
C. Driving with marijuana and guns in his vehicle.
D. Drinking and driving (his first such arrest).

27. What was the fatal flaw in a group of hipster anarchists' graffiti campaign against security cameras on Cherokee Street last spring?
A. A resident was able to identify the group's leader owing to his distinctive facial hair.
B. Their tags were legible.
C. They were caught in the act — by a security camera.
D. The plan went off without a hitch; the hipsters are still at large.

28. What the hell happened to St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony La Russa's face? (see pic: http://blogs.riverfronttimes.com /dailyrft/2011/04/tony_la_russa_face_pinkeye.php)
A. Poison ivy.
B. Shingles.
C. Cat scratch fever.
D. Line drive fouled into the dugout.
E. Allergic reaction to his transition lenses.

29. What caused a decline in meth-lab busts in Carter County under the stewardship of Sheriff Tommy Adams?
A. That new pseudoephedrine database really works!
B. The "shake-and-bake" method has become more widespread and less detectable.
C. Adams was a meth user and distributor.
D. More and more meth cookers are shifting to marijuana husbandry, which is far safer.

30. Which of the following did not happen to Missouri lieutenant governor Peter Kinder this year?
A. He had to pay back the state the $35,000 in public funds he'd spent on hotel bills.
B. His car got torched.
C. A former Penthouse Pet revealed that Kinder had hit on her years earlier, when she worked as a stripper on the East Side.
D. Kinder would like to forget 2011 as quickly as possible and hopes Missourians will do the same, especially since he's running for reelection in 2012.

31. What did state senator Maria Chappelle-Nadal call her fellow minority politicians who agreed with financier Rex Sinquefield that the city of St. Louis, and not the state of Missouri, should govern the St. Louis Metropolitan Police Department?
A. "Sinquefield's Sycophants."
B. "House slaves."
C. "Traitors."
D. "Douches."

32. Speaking of Maria Chappelle-Nadal, whose concert was she attending when she allegedly told state representative Jamilah Nasheed that if she had a knife, she'd slash her throat?
A. The Saint Louis Symphony Orchestra.
B. U2.
C. The Murder City Players.
D. Lil Wayne.

33. What reason did University City activist Elsie Glickert give for opposing the Chuck Berry statue in the Delmar Loop?
A. "Chuck Berry is a felon."
B. "Chuck Berry can't even sing anymore."
C. "'My Ding-a-Ling' is one of the stupidest songs ever recorded."
D. "For God's sake, Joe Edwards, don't you know Berry is from the Ville, not U. City?"

34. In May Christy Harris and Jesse Moore were busted for a three-state thieving spree. What did they steal?
A. Sudafed from Walgreens.
B. Used grease from restaurants.
C. Wrecked school buses from junkyards.
D. Stop signs from suburban intersections.

35. What prompted St. Louis police and liquor-control officers to conduct an undercover investigation culminating in a raid of Red 7, a nightclub on South Broadway?
A. Reports that Red 7 bartenders sold alcohol and tobacco products to minors.
B. Reports that Red 7 was a money-laundering and bootlegging enterprise operated by Russian mobsters.
C. Reports that Red 7 was a swingers' club that encouraged and abetted all manner of hanky-panky.
D. Reports that Red 7's beverage supply consisted of stolen Anheuser-Busch/InBev products.

36. Why did 78-year-old Verna Gremaud install a beehive in a community garden in the tiny north-county hamlet of Vinita Park?
A. Verna was fulfilling her lifelong dream of becoming a beekeeper.
B. Verna hoped bees would help pollinate the garden.
C. Verna wanted to generate revenue for Vinita Park by selling honey.
D. Verna thought the bees would deter vandals.

37. What measures did the Missouri Department of Natural Resources take to aid families who lost their homes to floods this past spring?
A. DNR supplied temporary housing facilities.
B. DNR waived camping fees at Missouri state parks for flood victims.
C. DNR personnel worked around the clock for the duration of state and federal cleanup efforts then pooled their overtime wages to create a fund for displaced residents.
D. DNR conducted free seminars on how to construct a treehouse and provided all necessary hardware and other materials.

38. Which municipality became the first in the St. Louis metropolitan area to recognize same-sex partnerships?
A. The City of St. Louis.
B. Chesterfield.
C. Vinita Park.
D. University City.

39. How much did Citizens for a Stronger St. Louis end up paying per vote in order to keep the city's 1 percent earnings tax?
A. $1.00.
B. $10.00.
C. $15.00.
D. $0.10.

40. What name did John Lamping, a Republican state senator from Ladue, propose for the new bridge over the Mississippi River that's currently under construction north of downtown?
A. The Boondoggle Bridge.
B. The Truman-Lincoln Bridge.
C. The Cubs-Cards Bridge.
D. Lamping's Bridge.
E. The Bridge to Nowhere.

41. In September the food truck Mangia Mobile changed its name to avoid confusion (and litigation) with the restaurant Mangia Italiano. What is the food truck's new name?
A. Sicily Streat.
B. Cha Cha Chow.
C. Gabagool!
D. The Original T-Rav Mobile.

42. Brentwood city administrator Christopher Seemayer pleaded guilty in June to charges of embezzling $30,000 from city coffers. How did Seemayer spend the ill-gotten loot?
A. He used it to pay for his son's college tuition.
B. He blew it at the Casino Queen.
C. He bankrolled his secretary's breast-enlargement surgery.
D. He spent it shopping at the Brentwood Promenade to help pay off the shopping center's TIF.

43. Complete this statement U.S. Rep. Todd Akin made during an interview with the Family Research Council: "At the heart of liberalism is..."
A. "...the belief that all men and women are created equal."
B. "...a soft, creamy center not unlike that of a Cadbury Creme Egg."
C. "...an insatiable urge to spend taxpayers' money."
D. "...a hatred of God."

44. The term "Knockout King" entered the local lexicon in 2011 after the murder of an elderly south-city resident. But the "game" itself — the object of which is to cold-cock an unsuspecting stranger, often in broad daylight — isn't new. By what name was it known back in the 1980s?
A. Southside Wild.
B. One-Punch Sucka.
C. Mama Said Knock You Out.
D. One-Hitter Quitter.

45. How does the metro-east municipality of Washington Park intend to repurpose the building that once housed its public library?
A. Turn it into a shelter for abused dogs.
B. Turn it into a community center.
C. Turn it into a topless club.
D. Tear the fucker down.

46. More than 9,000 citizens "liked" the Save St. Louis Del Taco page on Facebook, created in response to a local developer's plan to raze the flying-saucer-shaped fast-food landmark. How many opponents of the proposed demolition attended the June 24 meeting at which the city's board of aldermen was scheduled to discuss the structure's fate?
A. 0.
B. 100.
C. 500.
D. 1,000.

47. This past summer Boeing announced that it had teamed up with the Donald Danforth Plant Science Center and come up with a new form of biofuel derived from __________.
A. Corn.
B. Soybeans.
C. Pond scum.
D. Honey.
E. Marijuana.

48. Which restaurant did the St. Patrick Center, a Catholic charity that benefits the homeless, boot from its "Dine and Donate" fundraiser this past summer?
A. Hooters.
B. The Tilted Kilt.
C. Protzel's Delicatessen.
D. Imo's Pizza.
E. Chick-fil-A.

49. What percentage of Missouri lawmakers do not have college degrees?
A. 2 percent.
B. 7 percent.
C. 16 percent.
D. 28 percent.

50. Which St. Louis restaurant is the subject of a reality TV show airing on Oprah Winfrey's cable network?
A. City Diner.
B. Crown Candy Kitchen.
C. SweetArt.
D. Sweetie Pie's.

51. According to Joe Kriegesmann, a.k.a. Satan's Master, what acts would not be on display at the Facility, a BDSM club he spent most of 2011 fruitlessly attempting to open in south St. Louis?
A. People flogging each other in elaborate patterns.
B. People binding themselves to pillars with Saran wrap.
C. People shocking one another with ultraviolet wands.
D. People having sex.

52. Which of these statements was not made by former Cards center fielder Colby Rasmus' outspoken father, Tony?
A. "If Tony [La Russa] thinks it's so easy to be a spray hitter, how come he's never out in the batting cages?"
B. "Colby was not a great hitter in high school, and he's still not a great hitter."
C. "Tony [La Russa] needed pitching and wanted to force the GM into making a trade, so he belittled Colby to the fans."
D. "I don't want him to tell me anything that goes on. What's said between his coaches and him is his business. Nobody that teaches hitting wants to be second-guessed by somebody's dad. That just sounds like horseshit."

53. What is so unusual about Norman "Justice" Vick, a part-time security guard at St. Louis City Hall, and Lawrence "Pac" Pinkston, a part-time utility worker with the city's forestry department?
A. They are identical twins who were separated at birth.
B. They are members of the Wheels of Soul motorcycle gang.
C. Thanks to the part-time schedule, they were really one man doing two jobs.
D. They are German shepherds, the first two hires in the city's pilot animal-worker program.

54. What evidence bolsters the claim made by the late Bill Bangert, founder of the tiny west-county hamlet of Champ, that he was the world's strongest mayor?
A. He was a St. Louis Golden Gloves boxer.
B. He carried the 778-pound Dinnie Stones across a seventeen-foot bridge in Aberdeen, Scotland — and back.
C. He finished second in the 1952 AAU shot-put tournament, even though he was blind.
D. All of the above.

55. What did White Flag Projects gallery founder Matthew Strauss stipulate regarding entries for his August 2011 show, Für Elise?
A. All pieces must, in some way, feature a yeti.
B. All pieces must honor Beethoven.
C. All pieces must be created from pet hair.
D. All pieces must be conceptual portraits of Strauss' great-aunt Elise.

56. In March a pair of animals attacked a group of dialysis patients at Kenrick Plaza in Shrewsbury. What species were they?
A. Mountain lions.
B. Canada geese.
C. Elk.
D. Prairie chickens.

57. The Saint Louis Zoo asked the public to name the newest addition to its Asian elephant family, born in June. Which name received the most votes?
A. Kenzi.
B. Mya.
C. Zoe.
D. June.

58. After St. Louis mayor Francis Slay vetoed a bill that would allow speed bumps in O'Fallon Park, 21st Ward Alderman Antonio French complained that Slay's "Twitter feed reads like __________."
A. A teenage girl.
B. A Republican.
C. A cranky old fart.
D. Cory Booker.
E. A traffic scofflaw.

59. What are the Children of Sunshine?
A. The Church of Scientology's equivalent of the Girl Scouts.
B. A doomsday cult based in Chesterfield.
C. Missouri lieutenant governor Peter Kinder's nickname for Riverfront Times' editorial department.
D. A Webster Groves duo whose LP, Dandelions, has become a cult classic in the years since 1970, when they recorded it as fifth graders.

60. After thieves in East St. Louis steal manhole covers to sell to scrap-metal dealers, good Samaritans typically put what in their place?
A. Orange construction cones.
B. Discarded tires.
C. Particle board.
D. Dead bodies.

61. Which grunge icon joined Elvis Costello onstage at the Pageant in July to perform the Who's "Substitute"?
A. Krist Novoselic.
B. Eddie Vedder.
C. Courtney Love.
D. Neil Young.

62. After losing a close fight in June to St. Louisan Devon Alexander at the Family Arena, what did Argentine boxer Lucas Matthysse say he'd bring with him if he ever battled Alexander again in his hometown?
A. A better right hook.
B. A new manager.
C. More water to drink between rounds.
D. The police (because he was robbed).

63. How did Kevin Willmann, owner of the restaurant Farmhaus, celebrate the Cardinals' 2011 World Championship?
A. He served only red-meat entrées for an entire week.
B. He renamed his acclaimed poached escolar dish "Pujols' Delight."
C. He conned his way into the Cardinals' clubhouse celebration and served meat loaf.
D. He permanently reserved a corner table for David Freese plus-one.

64. Bassist Travis Morgan of the band Masculine Journey set a Guinness World Record for what during his band's October record-release show at the City Museum?
A. Longest time spent on a Ferris wheel.
B. Longest bass solo.
C. Largest electric bass.
D. Fastest time to shear a sheep.
E. Scoring the most adult films.

65. Cardinals manager Tony La Russa took the stage at the Fabulous Fox to play maracas for which headliner?
A. Steely Dan.
B. Paul Simon.
C. Carlos Santana.
D. Selena Gomez.

66. While awaiting imposition of his prison sentence for bilking millions of dollars from his investment-brokerage clients, how did Joshua David Gould support himself?
A. He worked as a mohel, performing ritual circumcisions.
B. Clad in a Statue of Liberty costume, he sang and danced to attract customers to an income-tax preparation company.
C. He administered personality tests for the Church of Scientology in the Delmar Loop.
D. He leeched off his parents.

67. After a tornado ravaged Joplin in May, radio talk-show host Rush Limbaugh visited the city to push what Tea Party-related product?
A. Two If by Tea bottled iced tea.
B. Patriotic tri-cornered hard hats.
C. Shovels with the Preamble to the Constitution printed on the handle.
D. Pez dispensers decorated with the heads of Tea Party luminaries.

68. Why did Webster University boot David Schwartz from its graduate program in family counseling?
A. He failed to maintain a 2.75 grade-point average.
B. His advisor felt he lacked empathy.
C. He posted indecent photos on his Facebook page.
D. He scoffed when discovering the school's mascot is a "Gorlok."

69. In August, Joseph Gamache went on a rampage outside the Chuck E. Cheese in South County Center after spying a white kid hanging out with a group of black kids. What was Gamache's weapon?
A. A pickax.
B. A pickup truck.
C. An atlatl.
D. A and B.

70. In November a Maryland Heights resident became the first Missouri hunter ever to bag a deer with what kind of weapon?
A. A boomerang.
B. A blowgun.
C. An atlatl.
D. A light saber.

71. What the hell is an atlatl, anyway?
A. A spear launcher.
B. A rocket launcher.
C. A type of slingshot.
D. A small-caliber rifle.

72. What is St. Louis firefighter Garon Mosby's claim to national fame?
A. He was a castaway on the 23rd season of Survivor.
B. He was Mr. March in Nation's Bravest: Firefighters Unite, a calendar featuring America's sexiest firemen.
C. A video in which he felled a Greco-Roman wrestling opponent with a move called the Flying Squirrel went viral on YouTube.
D. President Obama appointed him the official spokesman for National Fire Prevention Week.

Match St. Louis' placement in the following 2011 rankings:
73. Percentage of inhabitants with chlamydia.
74. Largest U.S. cities based on population.
75. "Most dangerous cities" based on violent crime.
76. "Saddest cities" based on suicide rates, antidepressant usage and unemployment.

A. No. 5
B. No. 4
C. No. 57
D. No. 2

77. St. Louisan George Hendry, who passed away in August, had his likeness emblazoned on a Wheaties box in 1936 for his prowess in which sport?
A. Football.
B. Soccer.
C. Table tennis.
D. Thumb wrestling.

78. KTRS (550 AM) radio personality JC Corcoran was suspended from the airwaves in November for inflammatory tweets directed at his critics. Based on Corcoran's tweets, what is his favorite insult?
A. "I know you are, but what am I?"
B. "Eat my shorts!"
C. "Blow yourself!"
D. "Suck it!"

79. In January a group of African American historic reenactors took historic reenaction to an unprecedented new level. What did they do?
A. They opened up a blacksmithing shop on Laclede's Landing.
B. They staged a slave auction at the Old Courthouse downtown.
C. They reenacted the Dred Scott trial, casting Scott as a white man facing a black jury.
D. They reenacted key Civil War battles with zombies.

80. How long did 39-year-old St. Charles resident James Wade last in the ring against Kimbo Slice during their pro boxing match in August?
A. 8 seconds.
B. 17 seconds.
C. 2 minutes.
D. 2 rounds.

81. In August, police busted the owner of a Wentzville tattoo parlor for having installed a hidden camera in the bathroom. What's the name of the tattoo parlor?
A. Chuck Berry's.
B. Miss Fanny's.
C. Full Moon.
D. Golden River.

82. City Museum founder Bob Cassilly died in a bulldozer accident in September. Where was he laid to rest?
A. He was interred on the third floor of the City Museum, in a replica of an Egyptian sarcophagus he constructed himself.
B. He was buried in the family plot in Bellefontaine Cemetery.
C. Family and friends rowed canoes into the Mississippi River and scattered his ashes.
D. He was buried in an undisclosed location inside Cementland, his unfinished amusement park in north St. Louis.

83. Board Bill 107, proposed by St. Louis Alderwoman Lyda Krewson, would impose tough restrictions on the city's pet owners. What does the bill require?
A. That all dogs and cats must be neutered or spayed, or their owners must pay a $200 annual fine.
B. That all dogs and cats must be microchipped.
C. That all dogs and cats must wear mittens on their paws when the temperature falls below freezing or there's ice salt on the ground.
D. A and B.

84. Former St. Louis Blues player Mike Danton, now with Sweden's IFK Ore, saved a teammate from choking on his own tongue during a game in September. Where did Danton learn this skill?
A. At a YMCA lifesaving class.
B. From his former Blues coach, Mike Kitchen.
C. In prison, where he spent five years for orchestrating a murder-for-hire plot.
D. From his mother, an emergency-room nurse.

85. University City Family Church pastor Brent Roam took a circuitous path to the pulpit of his church, which meets every Sunday morning at the Tivoli Theatre in the Delmar Loop. Which of the following is not part of Roam's past?
A. He was a Rhodes Scholar.
B. He was a professional mountain climber.
C. He starred in a series of B-movies, including The Toolbox Murders and Tremors 4.
D. He was the lead singer in the alt-country band Slydell.

86. Doctors at Barnes-Jewish Hospital have diagnosed several Missourians in recent years with a parasite known as paragonimiasis after the patients went on float trips. How did these patients allegedly contract the parasite?
A. Mixing river water with Jell-O shots.
B. Getting bit by an alligator gar.
C. Eating live crayfish.
D. Having sex on sandbars.

87. When Geoffrey Delicatecharacter was forced to skip several installments of the RFT video series Purple Prose owing to inpatient treatment for alcoholism, his twin brother stood in. What is Geoffrey's brother's name?
A. Dick Delicatecharacter.
B. Aaron Orion Delicatecharacter.
C. Norman Delicatecharacter.
D. Ignatius Delicatecharacter.

88. Marci Soto of Kirkwood wrote a memoir about her long-term affair with what R&B star?
A. Ray Charles.
B. Ike Turner.
C. Tina Turner.
D. Percy Sledge.

89. On August 27, what were the odds that the Cardinals would make it to the 2011 postseason?
A. 1.1 percent.
B. 7.2 percent.
C. 12 percent.
D. 13.3 percent.

90. During his trial earlier this year, which of the following reasons did Todd Shepard give for killing University City police officer Michael King in 2008?
A. A cop had killed his girlfriend during a 2001 drug raid, leading Shepard to become a "revolutionary" and vow revenge.
B. Earlier in the day, Shepard learned that then-presidential candidate Barack Obama would not seek an endorsement from Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan. Incensed, Shepard flushed his voter-registration card down the toilet.
C. A waitress at Red Lobster wearing a nametag that read "Truth" told Shepard she too was a revolutionary, reminding Shepard of his own revolutionary mission.
D. All of the above.

91. St. Louis-born horror-movie icon Vincent Price would have turned 100 years old on May 27, 2011. Where'd he go to high school?
A. Saint Louis University High School.
B. John Burroughs School.
C. Clayton High School.
D. Saint Louis Country Day School.

92. Which of these nonhumans did not get its very own Twitter account during the Cardinals' improbable late-season run?
A. Albert Pujols' statue.
B. Jason Motte's glove.
C. The Rally Squirrel.
D. Allen Craig's pet tortoise.

93. Tax revenue from the 2011 baseball postseason brought enough revenue to St. Louis that city employees don't have to take furloughs next year. Approximately how much money came in?
A. $500,000.
B. $1 million.
C. $3 million.
D. $5 million.

94. Washington University researchers discovered a gene that indicates whether a person is at risk for heart failure. To which organ is it connected?
A. The heart.
B. The kidney.
C. The gall bladder.
D. The liver.
E. The Hammond B3.

95. Who is Hikaru Nakamura?
A. The next Bobby Flay.
B. The next Bobby Fischer.
C. The next Bob Gibson.
D. The next Beatle Bob.

96. Where were the headquarters for Occupy St. Louis?
A. The Arch grounds.
B. Kiener Plaza.
C. Ballpark Village.
D. Hopeville.

97. For what offense was former Kinloch mayor Keith Conway sent to prison?
A. Theft.
B. Wire fraud.
C. Witness tampering.
D. All of the above.

98. What possibly not-so-mythical creature was shot and killed while stealing chickens near Springfield?
A. A vampire.
B. A chupacabra.
C. A jackalope.
D. A werewolf.

99. Why is Lisa Nasseff suing Castlewood Treatment Center, an eating-disorder clinic in Ballwin?
A. She didn't lose as much weight as she alleges she'd been promised.
B. Clinic administrators allegedly assured her that treatment was covered under her health-insurance plan, but it was not.
C. The food served at the clinic was "inedible."
D. Treatments involving hypnosis and hallucinogens allegedly convinced her that she'd been the victim of multiple rapes and belonged to a baby-killing Satanic cult.

100. According to Albert Pujols, his decision to sign with the Los Angeles Angels for $254 million had nothing to do with what?
A. Spite toward the Cardinals.
B. Southern California's favorable climate.
C. God.
D. Money. 

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2 comments
joeschmoe
joeschmoe

So, when are the results going to be published?

ppilch
ppilch

a waste of time. the 99% need to work to support the 1%.

 
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