Jim adds his take on Oprah: "I don't like her because she's fat."

Victoria's dad doesn't seem to put much stock in what Marlene says, though she's often an acute judge of her daughter. When the question of Victoria's motivation arises, she remarks, "I think she has tried to impress her father."

The conversation swerves to Obama's chances for reelection. "I think he has a good chance," Victoria says, "because the Latins will vote for him. The illegal aliens will vote for him."

"Illegals can't vote!" her dad interrupts. "How can they?"

Victoria is stumped. "Because...because of cheating."

Tomorrow morning, she's headed to New York to be on Fox & Friends. She'll plug Marriage Retreat, a Christian film about the sanctity of matrimony. Her small role, even she admits, "isn't going to win an Oscar." The demands of her new career, she laments, keep her away from her daughters and granddaughter. In a couple of weeks, she'll go "on a conservative cruise for [her] journalism job, and [she's] gonna do a handstand next to the Mayan rock that says the world is going to end in 2012."

As Victoria gets up to leave, father and daughter continue the list of who will vote for Obama: The liberals. The gays. The Muslims.

Says Jim: "Those who were aborted would if they were alive."

The family bursts into manic laughter. "Jim!" Marlene says. "You made a joke!"

Gus Garcia-Roberts is a staff writer at RFT sister paper Miami New Times.

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10 comments
Herbie
Herbie

Love her or hate her, this is a very interesting and humorous article.

deschl
deschl

that byotch is nutz she probably inherited it from her deceased aunt it's called paranoid schizophrenic everybody has one in their family

cooderbrown
cooderbrown

She's lunatic fringe as is hate mongorer Coulter and starve for attention Loesch.

Shane Imwalle
Shane Imwalle

No wonder Victoria Jackson plays such a convincing dumb bitch, it's truth in advertising!!!

Jarnae01
Jarnae01

I just wasted about 5 minutes of my life. I'm so ashamed! RFT, please don't degrade your awesome newspaper with this crap!

Martin G
Martin G

Nice, a bunch of name calling, queer cowards who can't understand that 1/2 of the country are Republicans.

Nice, all these cowardly queer liberals name calling from their toilets. These are the yutz-bags who think Joe Biden is smart. When will you queer Libs figure out 1/2 of the country are conservatives, Republicans or Indie's who think all Dem's are cowards and drug addicts.

Slopson
Slopson

I love when the RFT slips this crap in from one of their sister papers.

ihatesuburbs
ihatesuburbs

It's simple, back in the day we all watched SNL and thought she was pretending to be stupid for laughs. Turns out she is just stupid. Totally, utterly and mindnumbingly stupid, just like the whole bunch of tea bagging cunts that simply wont shut the fuck up and quit telling the world how fucking stupid they all are.

RETIRED1
RETIRED1

Even though this no-talent twit admits to one nervous breakdowm it appears she may be in the midst of another one now! I wonder if all those handstands scrambled her brain?! She is typical of the Tea Party nuts that spout such silly nonsense and appears to be pimping the even crazier twits that follow her to make a living off of her crazy sounding rants she is peddling!

Shane Imwalle
Shane Imwalle

We accept that you and 1/2 the country are racist morons who are scared to death of competing on a level playing field. Go watch your favorite tiddly winks player on X games!

 
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