Email Author Gregory Weinkauf

2003 Stories by Gregory Weinkauf

• Upper Middle Earth

  published December 17, 2003

  You know how it's often the ones we love whose flaws are most apparent? Well, when it comes to The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the... More >>

• Limp Pianist

  published December 10, 2003

  Just when you thought it was safe to go back into Hungary and listen to a song that supposedly causes people to kill themselves, along comes... More >>

• Kitty Litter

  published November 19, 2003

  If you're hankering for a movie about an awkward yet lovable "outsider" type who wanders into a pastel mockup of Middle America and cajoles the... More >>

• Living for Cinema

  published November 12, 2003

  Last year, at the very last minute, a stunning Scottish film festival favorite tore into my studio-saturated best-of-year list and launched itself... More >>

• Silly Humans, Matrix Is for Kids!

  published November 5, 2003

  A not terribly long time ago in an uninhabitable galaxy called Burbank, a generally astute movie studio founded by four Polish siblings alienated... More >>

• Fixin' to Die

  published November 5, 2003

  "I really like the cold -- it makes me feel really alive." There are few more attractive (or more atypical) things a woman can say, and when... More >>

• Ryan's Hope

  published October 29, 2003

  Remember that silly little-girl version of Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally, snuffling "I'm difficult!" through a charming tantrum? Well,... More >>

• Love and Death

  published October 22, 2003

  Sometimes something so wonderful appears on the big screen that I want to leap up like a shameless nonprofessional and hug it. Such is the case... More >>

• Ad-libbing on Tokyo Time

  published September 17, 2003

  Visualize Tokyo. Got it? Now add popular favorite Bill Murray, doing his "lovable schmo" shtick. Toss in American Rhapsody's up-and-comer... More >>

• Angst in Their Pants

  published September 3, 2003

  Most will deny it, but inside every grown man lurks a hypersensitive adolescent girl. Allow me to tell you all about mine and to share some of my... More >>

• Slight Flub

  published August 27, 2003

  When was the last time you said to yourself: "Y'know, what I seek for my viewing pleasure is a boring, obscenely diluted remake of Fight... More >>

• London Underground

  published August 13, 2003

  It's a great pleasure to behold a chunk of art that's both dank and fresh at the same time, and this appraisal perfectly fits the superb... More >>

• Le Fromage

  published August 13, 2003

  Ah, Paris -- City of Light, of Love, of Liver Damage and Lung Cancer. C'est formidable, non? Who in need of a posh vacation would turn down... More >>

• I Am Siam

  published July 30, 2003

  If, in keeping with current fads, you seek movies featuring females kicking a bunch of ass, your appetite will be tended (and cultivated) at the... More >>

• Captured and Enraptured

  published July 30, 2003

  "Simon must propose to me now," exclaims pretty, simpleminded Rose (Rose Byrne), "before he meets somebody else or gets to know me better!"... More >>

• The Unknown Planet

  published July 23, 2003

  Everyone in their right mind loves Donald Sutherland. The spry 67-year-old boasts one of the most respectable acting résumés this... More >>

• Pale Riders

  published July 16, 2003

  Those of you who'll join me in appreciating heavy skies, hard rain and looming melancholy will find plenty to enjoy in the English costume drama... More >>

• Kiss Me, Sons of God

  published July 16, 2003

  At the beginning of the third-ugliest decade of the twentieth century, a musical duo called They Might Be Giants put out an album called... More >>

• Reduced-Salt Dogs

  published July 9, 2003

  To prepare for reviewing Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, I did the obvious research: I watched... More >>

• The Young Girl and the Sea

  published July 9, 2003

  Once in a while, a film comes along that is as sound, smart, sweet and significant as can be, and Whale Rider is such a film. Fault... More >>

• Sidestep of the Machines

  published July 2, 2003

  Much like "hilarious Islamic comedy" or "sublime Affleck picture," the term "terrific second sequel" isn't bandied about too much. Name one. Took... More >>

• Just Like a Woman

  published July 2, 2003

  What is it with women, anyway? They want to be safe walking the streets at night; they want to be able to trust strangers; they want the world to... More >>

• Spanish Fly on the Wall

  published May 28, 2003

  French putz Xavier (Romain Duris) is depressed. The poor guy lives in Paris, has Amélie's Audrey Tautou as a girlfriend, eats... More >>

• Man Abroad

  published May 21, 2003

  Matt Dillon learned his lesson early: Suck up to the Hollywood fat cats, and you'll keep working. From his adolescent launch in the troubled-teen... More >>

• Mighty Mediocre

  published May 7, 2003

  Just to admit this up front, my ideal concept of musical comedy involves Bryan Adams and Dave Matthews garroting each other onstage with their own... More >>