Friday, March 4, 2011

McDonald's Ignores Ronald, Creates Questionable Toys

Posted By on Fri, Mar 4, 2011 at 10:00 AM

THEWEEKLYVICE.COM
  • theweeklyvice.com

McDonald's seems to be having a bit of an identity crisis. On one hand, they're phasing out scary as fuck kid-friendly mascot Ronald McDonald in favor of ads appealing to older, latte-swilling customers. On the other, they've plastered their logo all over a kiddie drive-thru toy with a fryer that makes real sizzling oil sounds, and it's pissing off British parents.

When did McDonald's get so complex, so concerned with demographics? It used to be all about the kids. With the furor over a toy drive-thru, are the days of kids pretending to be burger flippers and nugget fryers slipping away?

How can we forget all of these special childhood moments, brought to us by McDonald's toys and commercials blatantly aimed at the demographic most likely to be terrified by a devil-clown into eating fried meat paste?

Lego McDonald's

You could get away with a lot more in 1999 than you can now. Did anyone flinch back then when Lego introduced a drive-thru? Of course not. It was safe back then. As safe as waving a $100 bill from a convertible in a drive-thru lane. - PEERON.COM
  • peeron.com
  • You could get away with a lot more in 1999 than you can now. Did anyone flinch back then when Lego introduced a drive-thru? Of course not. It was safe back then. As safe as waving a $100 bill from a convertible in a drive-thru lane.

Ashton Drake McDonald Dolls

Even collectors of fancy-pants porcelain dolls love McDonald's! Just look at these collectible treasures with certificates of authenticity. There's "Baby's First Blood Pressure Incident"! And who can forget the precious sibling pair, "Mommy, I'm Concerned About These Clowns" and "I'm Going to Feed My Brother to The Clowns So I Can Steal His Shamrock Shake!"? - DADDYTYPES.COM
  • daddytypes.com
  • Even collectors of fancy-pants porcelain dolls love McDonald's! Just look at these collectible treasures with certificates of authenticity. There's "Baby's First Blood Pressure Incident"! And who can forget the precious sibling pair, "Mommy, I'm Concerned About These Clowns" and "I'm Going to Feed My Brother to The Clowns So I Can Steal His Shamrock Shake!"?

McKids French Fry Backpack

Mom told me to never talk to roller-skating assholes giving away empty calories.
  • Mom told me to never talk to roller-skating assholes giving away empty calories.

But what about Ronald?

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