Thursday, October 27, 2011

World Series 2011: The Fucking Chris Carpenter Fly Out Song

Posted By on Thu, Oct 27, 2011 at 11:52 AM

BLEEEEEEP
  • BLEEEEEEP

So, you think you're the best fucking fans in baseball, huh? Well fucking prove it! Download this fucking .mp3 file, stick it on your goddamn iPod and fucking memorize the fucking thing.

Then, when the fucking guy who runs the PA system at Baseball Fucking Heaven tries to get you pumped the fuck up by playing "Cha Cha Slide" by Mr. C the Slide Man (yeah, that's the fucking name of the song), don't just stand there clapping your fucking hands. Go all Chris Carpenter on the fucking Rangers. Sing the fuck along. Carp's the best fucking pitcher we got (who isn't on injured fucking reserve). He won a Cy Fucking Young award. He just fucking took a fucking pay cut to stay here a few more fucking years. He pitched a fucking gem in Philly to help get us this far. He shoulda fucking won game five except for some stupid fucking hit-and-run plus a fucking bullpen-usage brain-fart. The fucker can also spew obscenity like a fucking sailor. We fucking love the guy! Fuck yeah!

"You Piece Of Shit" by Riverfront Times

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