Rod Blagojevich

Blagojevich Gets Fourteen Years

flickr.com/photos/jasonized​The saga of Rod Blagojevich, erstwhile governor of the great state of Illinois, contestant on Celebrity Apprentice, inadvertent comedy star and fan of Elvis, Rudyard Kipling and the Chicago Cubs, has come to an end, or at least a long hiatus. This afternoon, U.S. D ... More >>

Blagojevich "Stunned" by Conviction; Former Illinois Governor Guilty on 17 Charges

​Our long, national bad-hair day is over. This afternoon a federal jury in Chicago convicted former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich of 17 counts of wire fraud, attempted extortion, bribery, extortion conspiracy and bribery conspiracy during his time in office, including a plot to sell the U.S. S ... More >>

Top Ten Idiotic Political Quotes of 2010

Image viaUm, is that like really in the Constitution? ​Some people were worried that once "Dubya" left office we'd suffer from the loss of eyebrow-raising political quotes. However, there's one thing in Washington that's never in short supply: stupidity. The good folks over at About.com's Politic ... More >>

On November 2, Cast Your Vote for Rich Whitey

image viaHe may be melanin-impaired, but he still prefers to be known as Whitney, not Whitey.​Uh, sorry, that's Rich Whitney, the Green Party's candidate for governor of Illinois. Unfortunately, his last name is showing up as "Whitey" on electronic voting machines in 23 Chicago wards, about ha ... More >>

Blagojevich Won't Be Retried -- Rob Blagojevich, That Is

image viaThe Blagojevich brothers in 1960.​If you think Rod Blagojevich is annoying now, just imagine how he must have been as a child. Now imagine having him for your little brother. By that criterion, Robert Blagojevich should be up for sainthood. Well, Rob is finally getting his just rewar ... More >>

Blagojevich on The Daily Show: 'In the next trial, I hope to testify again'

​Everyone's favorite disgraced ex-governor, Rod Blagojevich, was interviewed on The Daily Show Monday night, and it was, pardon our language, fucking golden. Comedically, that is. "I would like to see you as a victim, but you make it so hard," Stewart told him, after Blago said that he w ... More >>

Blago Gets the CGI Treatment

It's probably only a matter of time before The Rod Blagojevich Story comes to a basic cable channel near you. (But will it star the man himself? Wearing his own wardrobe? Now that would be worth watching.) But the Blago scandal has already been filmed, sort of. Behold this CGI animated version, with ... More >>

Blago Uncensored Ring Tones -- Now with F-Bombs!

Several weeks ago, an Illinois newspaper offered free Blagojevich ringtones so that online readers could enjoy Blago's "profanity-laced tirades" on incoming calls. We liked the idea. However, we didn't like that they'd bleeped out all the profanity from the "profanity-laced tirades." (We know dail ... More >>

Nervous 'bout Nieves: Readers are wary about aspiring pol's alleged temper

Rod Blagojevich Saved By One Stubborn Female Juror

Image viaDoes this look like the face of a criminal?​After a jury deadlocked on all but one of 24 corruption charges against Rod Blagojevich -- convicting him only of the relatively minor offense of lying to the FBI -- the former Illinois governor declared victory. Standing on the courthouse steps ... More >>

Blagojevich Guilty on Just One Count -- New Trial for 23 Others

Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich has been found guilty of one count of lying to the FBI -- even as the jury hearing the case against him deadlocked on an additional 23 counts, according to wire reports.Oh, Rod. Not again!​The judge has indicated he'll declare a mistrial. That means a new t ... More >>

The Onion Goes Deep Inside Illinois

Image sourceSpotted on Blago's ride?​Illinois is on the verge of bankruptcy. The state has essentially stopped paying its bills and has a budget deficit of about $12 billion. Lawmakers have had no ideas to make ends meet. At least until now. In their most recent issue, The Onion reports that offic ... More >>

Blago Won't Testify After All; Wife Loses Chance to Catch Up on Summer Reading

image viaWould this man lie to you?​Former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich, who, for the past year and a half, has been proclaiming his innocence to anyone who will listen (and even some who don't care), has decided to hold his tongue, for once. Blago announced his intention earlier this we ... More >>

The Moment We've All Been Waiting For: Blago to Testify at His Own Corruption Trial

Image source​Pull out the popcorn, folks. The best show in town gets underway in Springfield this week. "I will prove my innocence and I will testify," declared former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich last week as he left the courtroom that is the scene of his corruption trial. Blago has, si ... More >>

Ring, Ring, Ring, Blago-phone: Blagojevich Ringtones for the Taking

Image via "I've got this thing and it's (expletive) golden. And I'm just not giving it up for (expletive) nothing."​Look, friends, maybe it's time to admit it: We all have kind of a lot in common with impeached-and-disgraced former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich. We don't get to spend enough time w ... More >>

Illinois Cyclists Now Officially Protected by Law

Image source​If, while driving in the state of Illinois, you have felt an uncontrollable urge to mow down a cyclist who insists upon taking up an entire lane on a busy street, slowing traffic to a crawl and just when you have someplace important to go, control thyself. A new law, signed yester ... More >>

Tuesday Tussle: Part 1, Sin Taxes Are the Best Solution to the Illinois Budget Crisis

Image sourceA two percent tax on apples would have kept the Garden of Eden solvent.​Illinois has essentially stopped paying its bills. According to the New York Times, the state has $62.4 billion in pension liabilities and "owes more than $5 billion for schools, rehabilitation centers, child care ... More >>

Tuesday Tussle: Part 2, Sin Taxes? Illinois Needs to Maintain Its Dignity Instead

Image sourceWeep no more, Illinois. By resisting the path of sin, ye shall receive your heavenly reward.​Yes, it's true, these are troubled times for the state of Illinois. Our neighbor across the river is currently $12 billion in debt. Nearly half of that (OK, $5.01 billion) is owed to school ... More >>

Blago Wanted Oprah to Replace Obama in Senate

​Can I get in on that hug? -- Rod​He loved her conversations on the sofa. He knew next to nothing about her politics, still Rod Blagojevich thought Oprah Winfrey would be the perfect person to to fill Barack Obama's empty Senate seat. Or, was he just planting the seeds for his insanity defense? ... More >>

Blagojevich Trial, Radio Silence Start Tomorrow

Image source​It's been a grim week so far -- oil continues to spill out into the Gulf, the Israeli Army fought a Gaza aid flotilla and Al and Tipper Gore are separating -- and it's about to get grimmer. Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich, who has been going to hilarious lengths to protes ... More >>

Will Blago Ever Get to Hang in the State Capitol?

Image source​Rod Blagojevich may have been fired from Celebrity Apprentice, but that doesn't mean he's been forgotten by the people he used to govern. This week, the Post-Dispatch reports, the Illinois Senate will vote on bill that will prohibit state funds from being used to finance official ... More >>

Rod Blagojevich on Celebrity Apprentice: Week Four

Image source​Friends, for four weeks now, we've been watching Rod Blagojevich together on Celebrity Apprentice. It hasn't always been great -- actually, since every episode is now two hours, most of it is actually pretty damned boring, especially the parts where the celebrities meet the recipi ... More >>

Rod Blagojevich on Celebrity Apprentice: Week Three

Image source​It's an incredible responsibility being governor of a major state. There's so much work to be done, so many photo ops to smile for, so many profane phone calls to be made, so many favors to be sold that it's a wonder the governor has time to sleep, let alone keep up with modern te ... More >>

Rod Blagojevich on Celebrity Apprentice: Week Two

Image source​Two important revelations about former governor Rod Blagojevich from last night's episode of Celebrity Apprentice:1. Blago is still innocent.2. Blago has a thing for balloons.In this week's task, Donald Trump told the two teams to set up storefronts pimping Kodak's exciting new produc ... More >>

Rod Blagojevich on Celebrity Apprentice: Week One

Image sourceIs this the face of a guilty man...or a business genius?​Some people who believe they are accused of heinous crimes decide to prove their innocence in court. Other people go on TV reality shows. So two days after Rod Blagojevich's lawyers requested that his court date be postponed from ... More >>

Rod Blagojevich's New Court Tactic: Lull Jurors to Sleep

Image Via George Ryan's hair said the same thing​Rod Blogojevich pleaded not guilty on Wednesday to revised charges that he attempted to sell President Obama's vacant Illinois senate seat to the highest bidder. Then he revealed his new strategy for winning his seemingly unwinnable corruptio ... More >>

Blago to Compete on Next Celebrity Apprentice

It's been years since "You're fired!", accompanied by a cobra-like flick of Donald Trump's right hand, became a national catchphrase, so long, in fact, that Trump has resorted to casting celebrities instead of regular old celebrity-whores on his reality show The Apprentice.But now we may have a reas ... More >>

Finally! An Explanation for Rod Blagojevich's Hair

​I suppose many of you figured this out a long time ago. Turns out that ousted Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich is a huge fan of Elvis Presley, which goes a long way in explaining the disgraced politician's outrageous coiffure. (Personally, I always thought Blago's hair was an homage to Lego man. ... More >>

Fairmount Park Could Cash $7-Million Ticket Today

Image via​The owners of Fairmount Park might as well have hit a superfecta, a quadrella, and a pick four in the same afternoon of betting -- the jackpot they're about to cash-in is just that huge.Today, after nearly three years of legal wrangling, the area's only horse track will likely finally re ... More >>

The Morning Brew: Thursday, 10.22

​ Plum Organics issues baby food recall. (Los Angeles Times)FDA examines front-of-package labeling. (U.S. News and World Report)Have a $100 burger, served by Blago, in reality show restaurant. (Advertising Age)What a bento box says about a culture. (The New York Times)Talking coffee maker do ... More >>

Message Behind Blagojevich's New Website: In Rod We Trust

Have you seen the website former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich unveiled this weekend? www.thepublicityagency.com/rod-blagojevich​

F'ing Golden: Patti Blagojevich Eats a Tarantula, Nearly Drowns on Reality TV

Patti Blagojevich, wife of infamous ex-Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich, has officially began her stint on the NBC reality TV show "I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here" and she wants you to know she's doing it all for the kids.The potty-mouthed former Illinois first lady took her husband's place ... More >>

Unreal pumps up the volume with Blago, but it's all sucky from there

Who Needs Paul Mitchell When There's Rod Blago Shampoo?

Unreal just heard about some employees at a Chicago radio station who received an unexpected package last week, ripped it open and proceeded to laugh so hard that some of them peed their pants. The joke du jour: BLAGO Volumizing Shampoo and Conditioner - For Really Big Hair. "IT'S BLEEP'N GOLDEN!" r ... More >>

Can Blagojevich Survive the Jungle? Reality Show Wants To Know

Producers at NBC have asked former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich to participate in a reality show titled, "I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here!"The show drops ten celebrities in the middle of the Costa Rican jungle "to face challenges designed to test their skills in adapting to the wilderness. ... More >>

Blagojevich Pleads Not Guilty, Misquotes Theodore Roosevelt

flickr.com/photos/jasonizedRod Blagojevich's recent troubles have been a great joy to anyone who likes a little Victorian poetry mixed with their political theater. Who else would have the audacity to quote Tennyson and, on multiple occasions, Kipling?Blago's favorite poem is Kipling's "If": "If you ... More >>

Friday, April 3: Morning's Newz

Former governor Rod Blagojevich was indicted yesterday of sixteen felonies on charges of wire fraud, racketeering, attempted extortion and making false statements. Four other people from Blago's inner circle were also charged with crimes yesterday. View the entire indictment here. Two local yokels e ... More >>

Tuesday, March 24: Morning's Newz

Yesterday's high temperature hit 75. But was it warm enough for a swim? A helicopter yesterday rescued a man from the Mississippi River after he stripped off his clothes and jumped off the Jefferson Barracks Bridge. The man told police he was upset over a domestic problem. Ousted Illinois governor R ... More >>

Rod Blagojevich: The Musical

It was only a matter of time, wasn't it? The first Blago musical (I know of, anyway) will go on stage this weekend when the St. Louis community theater group StagedFrightMedia debuts its production, Waziriside Story: Till They Framed Rod Blagojevich.The musical, loosely based on West Side Story, jux ... More >>

Latest From Blago: Impeachment Is a "Sham"

Embattled Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich today called the impeachment trial against him a "sham." According the the Associated Press, Blago made that statement -- and others -- before his morning jog in Chicago. The impeachment trial is a sham. What the Senate and the House and Legislature is try ... More >>

Bard-ojevich

Best read in yesterday's Post-Dispatch was Kari Andren's observations of Rod Blagojevich's use of British literature.In the weeks since he was charged with attempting to sell Barack Obama's senate seat, the Illinois governor has turned at least three times to British authors to make sense/explain hi ... More >>

Well That Was Easy

Roland Burris, the man appointed by Blago to fill Obama's vacant Illinois senate seat, was officially sworn in this morning by Dick Cheney. Appropriate, no?

The Morning Brew: Tuesday, 12.9

In today's news: job cuts at Anheuser-Busch, Whole Foods sues and a bird-flu outbreak in Hong Kong.

Blagojevich and the Cubs: It Gets Better

From page 44 of the indictment of Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich, about the deal the Tribune Company was seeking on behalf of the Cubs (via Talking Points Memo): "During the call, Rod Blagojevich's wife can be heard in the background telling Rod Blagojevich to tell Deputy Governor A 'to hold up t ... More >>

File: View the Criminal Complaint Against Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich

By now you've probably heard about Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich being arrested early this morning by the FBI. Things have gotten strange in Chicago lately, what with Blago's alleged corruption finally imploding, the Tribune Company filing for bankruptcy protection and the perrennial losers, tho ... More >>

Bear Market Sandwich Extravaganza: Oscar Mayer Deli Creations Flatbread Sandwich, Steakhouse Beef with Garlic Parmesan Sauce

The Bear Market continues its quest to find cheap, tasty sandwiches. Today, an Oscar Meyer Deli sandwich.

Stoopers

Unreal stands up for stooping and encounters a local blogger who only has eyes for the Tampon Fairy. Plus, in a shocking move not seen since the Mesozoic era, the Mississippi River leaves St. Louis!

Thinkin' Lincoln

The Lincoln Library will bring visitors from around the world -- but for us, it's just a short drive away

Nags to Riches

A late push for slot machines in Springfield may be Fairmount Park's silver bullet

With Friends Like These

Who needs cable?