Rapper/Usher, the Muny
"We were out smoking at the Lambert Airport parking lot, the one near the runway, and there was a guy in his car taking advantage of a blow-up doll. Her head was bobbing up and down, giving him mock head or plastic head, whatever. Maybe he had an airplane fetish and a blow-up-doll fetish and he's lucky enough to live in St. Louis, where he can do both at the same time."
Barber, Happy Medium Barber Shop
"There's a lady I see merging into traffic at I-55 and Lindbergh, same time every morning, and she's looking in the mirror, putting on mascara and talking on a cell phone at the same time. Both hands occupied; she must be driving with her knees. It's reckless, and she's not driving slow, either."
"I was taking a friend home after drinking, and at the stoplight the forward drive went out, so I thought it'd be a good idea to go the rest of the way in reverse. I go around this corner, and then I must've overcompensated, because next thing I knew I'd wrapped the back end of the car around a tree. Apparently we hit the tree so hard that we 'fixed' the forward drive, and so we kept on going, dragging the tail end and making a hell of a racket."
"At Mizzou, I saw a guy masturbating in his car as he watched the coeds walk by, and in Soulard, walking home one night after a big snow, there was a guy on skis and he was being pulled though the neighborhood with a rope attached to the bumper of a car. He was wearing shorts and a Hawaiian shirt."
Lawyer/Rock Musician, Shrinking Violets
"Not the strangest but the best thing I've ever seen is Tawny Kitaen in the Whitesnake video, dressed in this ridiculous lingerie thing, writhing around on the hood of the sports car in self-ecstasy and to the delight of almost everybody who watched it on MTV."
Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.