Red-Letter Day

Ticketless. No TV. No radio. Trapped in an office with a Cubs fan lurking one floor below. All of that means nothing now that The Home Opener is finally here. Sure, the 3:10 p.m. game against the vanilla Milwaukee Brewers at the new Busch Stadium (Broadway and Poplar Street; 314-421-3060), is sold out, so forget about seeing it in person. Doesn't matter. Baseball's back in town. Sneak out of work and get to the bar. Play dead, and when the paramedics cart you away, roll off the gurney and run for the bar. Stay up all night developing a teleportation device, then beam yourself out of work and get to the bar. Whatever it takes. Opening Day. You're a Cards fan, for Stan's sake. Cubs fans whine about their lot in life — we find a way to get it done.
Mon., April 10
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