It wasn't all that long ago that Gut Check was donning our finest
Disney princess Star Wars character drag outfit and joining the swarms of greedy American children on the hallowed Halloween quest for candy. So we remember well the post-trick-or-treat ritual of sorting the bounty into two piles, i.e., Good Stuff and Crap.
Then we'd head back out and t.p. all the houses where we'd been handed lame candy. We considered the act to be a hint to the clueless to maybe bust out the Snickers next year instead of those execrable homemade popcorn balls. A community service, if you will.
Now we're on the other side of the door, trick-or-treatily speaking, and we're also working from a position of strength when it comes to stamping out Halloween-candy imbecility.
Want to avoid having your happy home t.p.'ed this year? Check back each weekday between now and the Big Day as we count down the 21 Best Halloween Treats and the 21 Worst Halloween Treats...
Worst Halloween Candy Countdown, No. 12: Peanut Butter Kisses Peanut Butter Kisses? More like kisses of death. Another terrible concoction to make it out of Necco's kitchens. Peanut Butter Kisses disappoint on nearly every level. A molasses taffy disaster in a wrapper, Peanut Butter Kisses are supposed to have a peanut butter center, but I've never been so lucky as to enjoy a peanut-y kiss after chewing on one of these for ten minutes. There's a reason stores have a million bags of these in the Halloween clearance section.
Click through to reveal No. 12 on the Best Halloween Candy list...
Best Halloween Candy Countdown, No. 12: Now and Laters Here's a candy that we don't mind sucking on. Now and Laters are like a Starburst that lasts for three hours. Tart, fruity and an enemy of loose teeth -- that's what we're talking about. Part of what makes Now and Laters light up the eyes of any trick-or-treater is the challenge. Working down the hard candy square to its soft and chewy end requires a bit of a workout for the old pie hole. They also prolong the longevity of your Halloween candy stash -- they usually come in pairs, and eating one takes about as long as a screening of It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.