What I'm concerned about right now is Jake the Crab, a giant inflatable mascot currently perched atop the mall's parking garage, overlooking I-270.
According to the press release that I received, Jake the Crab is 8 feet tall, with a body 17 feet wide and legs that extend another 25 feet. When inflated, he weighs 700 pounds. Now, while I have no doubt that whoever set up Jake atop the parking garage obeyed all safety measures to the letter, if I were driving on I-270 in a heavy storm, I would be scared silly that Jake would brake free, roll down the hill and crush whatever human vehicles dared obstruct his path.
In other words, until Jake comes down on Thursday, March 5, I'll be taking surface roads through the Des Peres area.
(And I thought land crabs were terrifying.)