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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Chicken of the Sea Brings Back Dead-Eyed, Gangster Spokes-Mermaid

Posted By on Wed, Mar 16, 2011 at 7:00 AM

Go on. Ask her. - WIKIPEDIA
  • Wikipedia
  • Go on. Ask her.

Ask any mermaid you happen to see, What's the best tuna? Chicken of the Sea!

Remember that jingle? It's been a long time since Chicken of the Sea used it, along with their lovely blond cartoon mascot. Check this out from 1980.

Back then she didn't talk. No, it was her job to look purty while sturdy housewives sang the praises of government-approved tuna.

Now she's back, and does she ever have a lot to say.

Even though she obviously has no soul, she can't handle all those stupid, "Why?" questions from the kid who doesn't understand how tuna and food commerce work. But that's okay, because she's also spouting her merwisdom on Twitter:

Don't sleep with the fishes #Mermaidtipless than a minute ago via HootSuite

Good call. No one likes a mermaid with a nasty case of Ichthyosporidium

Sicilian Tuna Soup - Note to self, just because its cheap doesn't mean its not gangster! #BecauseImGangsta #Recipe http://ow.ly/4f8Inless than a minute ago via HootSuite

Sleeps with the fishes? Gangster soup? So, she cut a deal with the Mermaid Mafia to get her job back.

I got 99 problems but a fish ain't oneless than a minute ago via HootSuite

Oh. She's that kind of gangster.

You go girl! @jane_bot: I'm not a mermaid but sometimes I tape my ankles and act like one.less than a minute ago via HootSuite

Okay. That's it. We liked her better before she talked.

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