For the poor souls who have Margherita dreams on a Totino's budget, though, today is your lucky day. To celebrate its one-year anniversary, the fast-casual pizza chain Doughocracy (6394 Delmar Boulevard, University City; 314-833-4277)
is giving away any hand-tossed, single-topping pizza for a dollar from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. That's right — for four quarters you'll get more than just a slice of heaven; you'll get the whole pie.
"Everyone is so sick of the election and no one feels good about next Tuesday," says Doughocracy's spokeswoman Dana Kay Goddard. "So we're telling people to forget about the Republican Party or the Democratic Party. Let's just have a pizza party!"
In keeping with the theme, Goddard says that Doughocracy will have a petition available for diners to sign, asking to add "Pizza Party" to the 2020 ballot. It's a little ridiculous for sure, but Goddard thinks we all could use some levity.
"2016 has been a year that many wouldn't mind erasing altogether," she says. "But we're just happy to be here and are appreciative of each and every pie-loving customer who has ever walked through the door."
We're not sure how we feel about democracy these days — kind of depends on how things go Tuesday. But Doughocracy? That's definitely something we can get behind.
Editor's note: This post was amended after publication to clarify that the deal is only good until 1 p.m.
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Usually, the lunchtime options afforded by the spare change you can scrounge from your couch cushions are few and far between: a gas station roller dog, two Jack in the Box tacos, a stick of off-brand beef jerky.