St. Louis Craigslist Musician Post of the Week: Define Your Terms

By Annie Zaleski on Mon, Sep 28, 2009 at 2:25 pm

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      {
        "name": "Ad - NativeInline - Injected",
        "component": "37365813",
        "insertPoint": "3",
        "requiredCountToDisplay": "5"
      },{
        "name": "Real 1 Player (r2) - Inline",
        "component": "37365812",
        "insertPoint": "2/3",
        "requiredCountToDisplay": "9"
      }
    ]

(Welcome to a recurring feature on A to Z: The Craiglist Musician Post of the Week. Associates and friends keep sending me links to funny and/or bizarre listings -- ones that deserve to be shared with the world.)

This one starts off with a question that's only semi-rhetorical: DEATH METAL? It goes on from there:

the black dahlia murder isn't death metal
suicide silence isn't death metal
oceano isn't death metal
job for a cowboy isn't death metal
whitechapel isn't death metal
the faceless isn't death metal
abigail williams isn't death metal

What else isn't death metal, you ask?

your flat iron hair straightener isn't death metal
your tight and bright t shirt isn't death metal
your flat billed black cardinals cap with the sticker on the bill isn't death metal
hardcore dancing isn't death metal

your gym shorts aren't death metal
your tattoos aren't death metal
your pig squeals aren't death metal
you aren't death metal

Sincerely, a guy that knows the difference between death metal and hardcore