A: Whoooooo-WHEEE Hank! Thanks for the support, and keep up the fight to protect our God-given American way of life from these Bush-hatin', sprout-eatin' pinkos who never heard of a little thing called the SECOND AMENDMENT! You know what keeps me alive?! Droppin' a lion from 200 yards with a bolt-action rifle and some 175-grain ammo, or plantin' a two-blade broadhead into the rib cage of a wooly musk ox. YOWZA!!! That's the spirit of the wild in action, brother! Hank, if you got $1,500 layin' around I highly recommend joinin' me for some wild-hog huntin' at the Ted Nugent Pork Slam 2005 down here at my Texas ranch in November. Adventure and plenty of pure-protein meat GUARANTEED! But sometimes the thrill of the kill ain't enough, Hank. Sometimes you gotta strap on a custom Stars & Stripes Les Paul, fire up the amps, dangle a fox tail from your pants and give 'em a little WAAAAANGO TAAAAAANGO, baby! That's livin', Hank! GOD, GUNS AND ROCK & ROLL FOREVER!!!!
Show begins at 2 p.m. on the Budweiser stage. Tickets are free; call 314-434-3434 or see www.fairstl.org for more information.