5. Inner monologue of band member onstage: "Gee I sure am hungry. I sure could go for a piece of fruit that somebody painted all over and glued to some fucking cardboard. It's too bad....oh wait....YES!"
4. Hot Mamas and truant teens: One Direction's fanbase, identified.
3. Considering the way the young ladies seem to throw themselves enthusiastically at the members of this band, I'm not so sure a "One Direction Infection" is really something you want to have. See a doctor about that.
2. I wonder what they saved her from? Probably like a burning building, or maybe the grasp of King Kong.
1. Rivalries are born at One Direction concerts. Blood feuds that run deep. These warring factions can't stay peaceful forever. They should probably just fight it out in the street and be done with it. The streets will run red with the blood of Louis Tomlinson fans. (TEAM NIALL FOREVER!!!!!1111ONEONEELEVEN)
RFT MUSIC'S GREATEST HITS
The 15 Most Ridiculous Band Promo Photos Ever "Where Did My Dick Go?" The Gathering of the Juggalos' Best Overheard Quotations I Pissed Off Megadeth This Week, My (Former) Favorite Band The Top Ten Ways to Piss Off Your Bartender at a Music Venue
Follow @rftmusic
