The Best St. Louis Metal Shows: May 2014

May 12, 2014 at 4:09 am
Kerry "Burger" King and the Slayers, performing at the Pageant on May 15. - Press Photo
Press Photo
Kerry "Burger" King and the Slayers, performing at the Pageant on May 15.

Looking for a good place to see flashy and exciting music played at high volume, have your mind blown by dark and powerful sounds, or just stomp around like a drunken goon with your shirt off? Then a heavy-metal concert just might be the place for you. Each month I'll be offering my top picks of the upcoming metal shows in town that shouldn't be missed. And I'll try really hard not to wish death on whatever falseness may be approaching.

Slayer with Suicidal Tendencies and Exodus at the Pageant May 15 7:30 p.m. / $32.50 to $35

Well, here's a controversial one. Omitting a Slayer show from a "best metal shows of the month" list seems wrong, but then again so does calling a Hanneman and Lombardo-less band Slayer. But hey, I wrote about a goddamn Pantera cover band once, so why not a Slayer one?

Slayer was that super awesome band that put out four or five of the best metal albums ever created before the guy who wrote all the good songs died and they kicked the founding drummer out for asking about his paycheck. Then the band's singer became a Catholic and the remaining wah-wah pedal player, who legally changed his name from Kerry King to Tribal Tony in the early 2000s, turned the band into a merchandising outfit and starred in a Jagermeister commercial wearing sunglasses indoors.

Go for Exodus, stay for Suicidal and then throw hot dogs at Kerry King and see how many he catches in his mouth. RIP Jeff.