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Thursday, June 20, 2013

Marilyn Manson Plays the Villain: The Uncut Edition

Posted By on Thu, Jun 20, 2013 at 7:01 AM

Page 4 of 4

I should've asked him about Ray Manzerek from the Doors dying and told him about how I think the Doors only have three good songs and one of them is a cover of a traditional German drinking song. I should've asked him something stupid like how big his dick is or what he thinks about when he masturbates. I should've spent the entire interview pretending that I was interviewing him for Home and Garden Magazine.

But instead, I just listened to a fairly inebriated Marilyn Manson regurgitate the answers to questions like, "What have you been up to," and "Tell us about your blarfarglebargledorfdorfgurgle." Can you imagine having to take time out of your day where you are a famous musician, who once had all of conservative society by the balls to talk to some bald idiot whose main concern is fitting into a pair of black jeans so they don't have to buy new ones?

As Marilyn Manson is forced to now play the role of villain, dater of hot mysterious women, has-been, or "dude he's kinda smart I saw him in Bowling for Columbine"...I was forced to play the role of some dumb fuck with a computer.

I don't regret the interview - my time was limited and my character was immediately defined as "some motherfucker who is going to talk to a more interesting motherfucker for twenty minutes." But I didn't get to find out what I wanted to find out: How the fuck does Marilyn Manson deal with being Marilyn Manson? It sounds terribly annoying and frustrating. But, at least I managed to talk to him about the Legendary Stardust Cowboy, the artist that David Bowie took part of his Ziggy Stardust moniker from and the man that I wrote a letter to once, asking to collaborate on a hardcore punk record. He didn't write back, even though I included a stamp.

I wanted to bond with Marilyn Manson. I wanted to tell him about how people throw beer bottles at my face when my band plays shows because they think that's what they're supposed to do. I wanted to tell him about how I used to go to parties in high school and people would stand around me in a circle and order me to "Say something funny, Ailes."

But in a way, I did bond with Marilyn Manson. Watching and reading all of these interviews made me realize that he was just some guy who wanted to get everyone's attention, just like me. The difference is, he managed to get it, and show people like me how grateful I should be for never achieving really much of anything in the public eye. So thanks for that, Marilyn Manson. Your art connected with someone.

See also: -Crotching Whiskey at the Justin Bieber Concert and Getting Thrown Out: A Review -The 15 Most Ridiculous Band Promo Photos Ever -The Ten Worst Music Tattoos Ever

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