A Reason To Love the 2009 Rams: Fantasy Defense Gold Mine

Sep 28, 2009 at 10:26 am
It's the fantasy potential of the 2009 Rams offense. - soundofcannons.blogspot.com
soundofcannons.blogspot.com
It's the fantasy potential of the 2009 Rams offense.
After yet another sullen Sunday afternoon all but the most hardcore Rams fans have resigned themselves to the fact that 2009 is destined to be an epic failure almost on par with the 2008 disaster. After the latest morale-crushing defeat, this one at the hands of the Green Bay Packers, it's obvious that the players still make the same boneheaded mistakes, the quarterback (be it Marc Bulger or Kyle Boller) still fails to find open receivers or throw the ball away under pressure, and the head coach still hasn't found a way to overcome his talent-deficient roster.

But don't despair Rams fans, there is a teeny-tiny solitary speck of consolation to be had-- especially for those of you who are fantasy football-inclined.

The solace comes in the form of the Rams offense. Sorry, Steven Jackson owners, we don't mean that in a good way. The Rams are almost guaranteed to give up 10+ fantasy points to the opposing defense. For those not blessed to own one of the top fantasy defenses (Philly, New York Giants, and Denver) or dealing with a bye week, picking up the D of whichever team the Rams face is a winning strategy.

Take yesterday, the Packers entered the game ranked a respectable 79th overall with a total of 25 fantasy points scored. Thanks to early fumbles and an interception, they racked up 10 points a number that easily have been higher had they been able to put one of the Rams red zone turnovers into the end zone.

Cha-ching.
Sure, skeptics will say that its disloyal-- traitorous even-- to root for your real-life team's offense to fail miserably every week simply so your fake team that exists only in the Internet world will succeed. It absolutely is. No doubt about it.

But if the Rams are going to implode every week anyhow, why not cheer them on as they go down in flames? Imagine: every Bulger (or Boller interception) is a cause for celebration; a blocked kick and you're high-fiving your friends; yet another Stephen Jackson fumble and you're ecstatic. Even killer penalties from the likes of Adam Goldberg and Richie Incognito will deserve an applause for wiping positive yardage off the board. It sure beats the heck out of cursing and throwing the remote like you do now, doesn't it?

Other than late season matchups against Detroit and Houston (the only foreseeable chance for a Rams victory) the strategy is pretty much fool proof. Even the lowly Redskins were a viable fantasy play last week. Now, Boller -- an improvement over Bulger -- has 45 career touchdowns and 45 career interceptions after yesterday. He's just as likely to throw a pick as he is to score! You can't lose! (Well, the Rams can lose, but you can't.)

So fantasy football nerds in St. Louis, when you're updating your roster for Week 4 this afternoon at the office, you know what defense to acquire: The San Francisco 49ers. They may be ranked a measly 179th overall in Yahoo! leagues (almost ensuring free agent status) but that number is sure to increase after a healthy dose of Rams ineptitude.