Camel Suspected of Fornicating Llama to Death While En Route to Kirkwood Festival

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Good night, sweet prince
As always, the Greentree Festival in Kirkwood had fun stuff this year: a parade, arts and crafts, funnel cakes.

But the petting zoo was one llama short. That's because the animal was transported to the festival on Friday, September 14, in the same trailer as a camel, and the camel had sexed it to death while in transit.

Such was the rumor we heard last Friday, and so we immediately phoned Murray Pounds, Kirkwood's parks and recreation director, to ask: Is it true?

"That was the suspicion," he told us, "that there was an 'interaction.'"

Uh...what kind of interaction?

"Exactly what happened, I don't know," Pounds replied. "But we have our suspicions. The young juvenile camel was rather rambunctious. That's how it was described to me."

Pounds said he did not know the gender of the deceased llama.

(Daily RFT felt weird asking that question.)

(Daily RFT felt weird asking all of these questions.)

The outside contractor who put on the petting zoo, which is listed on search engines as S & S Farms with an address in High Ridge, did not reply to a voicemail we left on Friday. But we'll update this post when they do.

As for the camel in question, he apparently did make an appearance at the petting zoo, because an RFT staffer recalls petting him without knowledge of the dromedary's earlier antics. Just to be clear: We do not reward this behavior nor will we go anywhere near this camel again. 

He sounds like a real one-hump chump. 
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