We've all seen them: The trucks straddling the center line. The mini vans that ping pong back and forth, bouncing from one side of the lane to the other, just on the brink of sideswiping a parked car on the right, only to sway back and come dangerously close to their left-lane neighbor. The compact cars hovering in the lane for oncoming traffic, in pursuit of the fabled "Missouri Left-Hand Turn." The questionable "stops" that occur at many city stop signs.
Most natives of the Midwest are happy to laugh off the less-than-perfect driving skills that mar the streets daily. (That's Midwest "nice" for you.)
This Daily RFT-er, however, learned to drive on the West Coast, where people use horns and middle fingers to tell you exactly what they think of your driving skills. This Daily RFT-er has learned that such methods are somewhat less accepted here, after giving, shall we say, The Treatment to a few less than able drivers.
Today, however, this Daily RFT-er has been validated.
The Daily Beast compiled new driving and accident statistics from all 50 states, and guess what, Missouri?
You have the seventh-worst drivers in the country.
According to the data, 32 of every 50 citations issued here are for failure to obey traffic signals or signs, and another of 7 of every 50 are for driving under the influence. Another 9 of every 50 are cited for careless or inattentive driving.
So that's:
64 percent--disobeying traffic laws
14 percent--DUI
18 percent--Get off the phone. Seriously.
And, judging from the results, it's safe to say that the aggressive coastal drivers have it right. The horns and the fingers and everything just may be deterring drivers in those states from Missouri-style excesses: Florida is the worst-ranked state on either coast, and it didn't even make the top ten. (It boasts a 14th-worst rank.) On the West Coast, Washington ranks 33rd, California 40th, and Oregon occupies the 43rd slot. Not bad!
If you feel the need to watch a true driving master at work, or a demonstration on how to properly flail and otherwise angrily gesture within the confines of your vehicle, thereby helping to bring the surrounding drivers up to a higher standard, just keep an eye out for a
gold Volvo deatchscort-mobile, on a road near you.