The Return of Oil Can!

We've all seen that movie, the one with Dennis Quaid, and he used to be a big prospect pitcher, but he blew out his arm, right? And then he goes to big league camp one year, after he's been coaching little league for like ten years, and all of a sudden he can throw like a hundred miles an hour? Yeah, that's the one. That movie sucked. Big time. 

But you know who probably didn't think it sucked? Oil Can Boyd

See, Oil Can Boyd, a pitcher who last played in the big leagues in 1991, wants to make a comeback.

Sure, he's 49 years old. Sure, he hasn't thrown a pitch in the majors in eighteen years. Doesn't matter to Oil Can.

Oil Can (real name Dennis Boyd), just wants to prove to some team that he's still got the stuff to be successful in the big leagues. 

Boyd, dancing in a Boston area "Dancing With the Stars"-style charity event. Looks pretty spry to me. 
Boyd, dancing in a Boston area "Dancing With the Stars"-style charity event. Looks pretty spry to me. 
All he really wants, in fact, is fifteen minutes of some team's time. 

"I have nothing to lose, and all a big league team has to lose is fifteen minutes. Give me fifteen minutes, and I'll prove I can still pitch." 

He says his arm feels great; better, in fact, than it has in years. He claims he's throwing in the low 90s. He says his changeup has come back to him. In short, Oil Can Boyd is telling everyone who'll listen that he's a viable pitcher, right now. 

Okay, okay. I know this sounds like somebody's idea of a joke, but apparently the man is completely serious. And you know what? I think I like the idea. 

Boyd has said he wants to emulate his idol, Satchel Paige, who famously pitched into his 50s with the Cleveland Indians after a long, near-mythic career in the Negro Leagues.

So hey, there is some precedent. Now, I'm not sure that Oil Can Boyd is Satchel Paige, but I'd sure like to see if he is.

So how about it, Mo? I say we bring the guy in for a tryout. Hell, I'll give you 2-1 odds that he could be better than Joel Pineiro right now, with no spring training. Okay, so that's not really fair; Dave McKay misses more bats during batting practice than what El Pinata does. Still, the point stands. I can't imagine it would take more than a few minutes to see if there's anything left in the tank. 

Come on, let's do it. Guy looks like he's still in pretty good shape. At the very least, we'll get to see if he can still get his leg up as high as he used to in his delivery. And if this works out, we can look into signing Pascual Perez, too! Perez was my favorite pitcher for a couple of years, and he retired the same year as Boyd. Let's make this shit happen. 

And hey, if Boyd blows out his shoulder and needs surgery, no worries. I'm pretty sure Medicare will take care of it.

Scroll to read more St. Louis Metro News articles (1)


Join Riverfront Times Newsletters

Subscribe now to get the latest news delivered right to your inbox.