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  • Do Weed Detox Drinks Work? Here’s What Happened to Me

    Do Weed Detox Drinks Work? Here’s What Happened to Me

    Staying hydrated is key when preparing for a drug test with a weed detox drink.

    Back in 2008, I had recently graduated college a year early with no clue as to my next move. Thus, like many post-graduates before me, I spent many days on my parents’ couch, until that fateful morning that my mom announced she had called in a favor.

    My wonderful mom had previously worked with the son of the general manager of a very fancy department store. She called this GM, an impeccably dressed, respectable, and austere man, to tell him it was time to get me off the sofa.

    As luck would have it, he told her there was an opening in luxury handbags, so I was shocked when I was abruptly roused from the couch and told that I needed to print out my resume (this is before the LinkedIn days), put on professional-looking designer duds, and march my butt to human resources to apply.

    I aced the interview and was informed in the next couple days that I was in fact, hired. But employment hinged on the results of a drug test.

    The company I had applied to, though I have no idea what’s become of the culture there now, at the time, was known for their very strict drug and alcohol policies. If weed was found on a drug test, you would not be hired.

    The contract for employment also stated they could drug test you randomly at any time, and if you failed, you would be fired on the spot.

    So, I had to make an appointment at a local lab for the following week to take my drug test (urine analysis).

    Was I nervous? If I’m being honest, no. Selling designer handbags for thousands of dollars a pop to the privileged wasn’t exactly my dream job. If I failed the drug test, there were no dreams in danger of shattering.

    On the other hand, I didn’t want to embarrass my mom. She had, albeit without my knowledge or consent, stuck her neck out for me with a powerful and influential person. And she actually worked for the same company at a different location. This means that her reputation was somewhat at stake, and if you know any boomers from the South, you know that reputation is everything.

    But because I hadn’t known that I would be up for a job and subsequent drug test within a week, I had no time to abstain from cannabis. I was a regular smoker, thinking the jig might already be up.

    I had never used a weed detox drink before, but I’d known of multiple people who had, and with success. I put my faith in the social proof from these elixirs and high-tailed it to the local head shop.

    I cannot recall what brand I used, but I can tell you one thing, the drink was expensive. And I had to drink two different things, one the day before, and one within a specific window of time the day of the test.

     

    Woman drinking a green liquid detox drink to cleanse THC from her system.

    Using a weed detox drink can help flush THC from the system before a drug test.

    I remember the instructions told me to stop smoking at least 72 hours before the test. Whoops. 48 hours was the best I could do.

    I also remember I had to drink a ton of water the day before to flush out my system, which makes sense. However, the day of, I had to be careful.

    If there’s too much water in the urine sample, often the testing lab will ask you to repeat the process for a more accurate reading. Which would mean another expensive weed detox drink.

    On the day of the test, I arrived at the lab, having followed the instructions of my weed detox to the tee, except for the 72-hour cessation. I did my thing at the lab and promptly hopped in the car of my bestie, who had a bowl waiting for me back home.

    The result? I was selling Italian lambskin totes to the Southern social elite the next week.

    The drink had worked, and it had worked in spite of the fact that I smoked 48 hours before the test instead of the recommended 72-hour cessation period.

    Based on my own experience, yes, a quality weed detox drink will work for a urine drug test, and it may even work if you don’t follow the directions exactly as described by the manufacturer.

    However, there are a couple major caveats I want to point out before any readers go and do the same thing that I did.

    Caveat number one, people metabolize cannabinoids at different rates.

    If you have a faster metabolism, your chances are better at beating the test. I’ll give you an example:

    One of my oldest friends is rail-thin. He eats more than anyone I know, and he actually drinks weight-gain concoctions just to prevent looking gaunt. I remember in high school, his parents once sprung a surprise urine test on him. He passed, even though he smoked the day before.

    Admittedly, I was born with a pretty fast metabolism as well. And since THC is stored in fat cells, I probably had a higher chance of passing versus an individual with a slow metabolism.

    If you need to pass a drug test soon, I’ve heard recommendations to drink lots of water and exercise vigorously in the weeks leading up to the test, with the idea that you’re more likely to flush out the lingering cannabinoids that way.

    However, I discovered this scientific study that found exercise and food deprivation did not affect the outcomes of drug tests. So, take the aforementioned diet and exercise recommendations with a grain of salt.

    Caveat number two, hair tests are tougher to beat.

    I have zero experience with hair drug tests, as my lovely anecdote was the one and only time I was ever drug tested. But from what I understand, hair tests are significantly harder to beat.

    For one, they are more difficult to tamper with. And two, hair follicle drug tests can determine drug use within a larger window of time. THC lingers in urine for only around 30 days but can be detected in hair follicles within a 90-day timeframe.

    Nowadays, there are shampoos you can order online that supposedly can help you beat the hair follicle test. I can’t speak to these, but what I can say is that from my own experience, getting a recommended weed detox drink from a reputable head shop and following the directions is most likely the best bet to pass a urine drug test. That is, if you don’t want to stop smoking a whole month before.

  • Puke, Boobs, Beads

    Puke, Boobs, Beads

    Scenes from Mardi Gras 2009, February 21 in Soulard. Some photos may be NSFW (not safe for work.)

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    By Egan O’Keefe
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  • The 10 Best New St. Louis Restaurants of 2023

    The 10 Best New St. Louis Restaurants of 2023

    Ten years ago, I sat down to write my first-ever Best New Restaurants roundup as a brand-new critic dazzled by all of the thrilling places I’d had the pleasure of getting to know as I found my footing and familiarized myself with the state of St. Louis food. Now, a decade later, I know much more about the people and players who make the region’s food community what it is, but I am as awestruck as ever.

    This year’s crop of restaurants (which is limited for our purposes here to those places I reviewed in 2023) is a remarkable one that cannot be defined by one trend or genre, but instead underscores how many interesting voices we have in our food scene. There are veteran restaurateurs, newcomers and people showing St. Louis new cuisines. Some have created showstopping bastions of fine dining, others are fast-casual spots, but what they have in common is that their chefs, owners and staff use their platforms to tell a unique story of who they are and what matters most to them — one that’s based on an unrelenting passion for food.

    This will be my last Best New Restaurants list for the Riverfront Times. As my time as its critic draws to a close, I can’t feel anything other than fortunate to have had such an important platform — one that I have always felt has less to do with food and everything to do with the people behind the places where we have the pleasure of eating. Getting to share their stories has been one of the biggest joys of my life — one I will never forget, and one that has made my life, and hopefully yours, infinitely more delicious.

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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen

    10. Bagel Union

    Last year around this time, St. Louis bagel lovers were lamenting the loss of what was considered the last great bagel shop in town, the Bagel Factory. Now, we are awash in the wonderful, boiled delicacies, with fantastic shops having sprung up all over town this past year (Deli Divine, Lefty’s, C&B Boiled Bagels), as if there was some sort of culinary zeitgeist that inspired such a pursuit. Leading the pack is Bagel Union (8705 Big Bend Boulevard, Webster Groves), the sophomore effort from the brilliant bread minds of Union Loafers, which demonstrates the simple joy of a bagel done right.

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    The Bagel Union crew

    Mabel Suen
    The shop is, of course, anchored by its classic bagels, which nail the chewy interior and crispy exterior that defines an exceptional (and classic) product. However, just as Union Loafers dazzles as much for its cafe fare as its wonderful bread, Bagel Union’s delicious, composed bagel sandwiches are where it shines the brightest. These include a delicious spicy tuna salad, great egg salad and the outstanding open-faced salmon roe, which consists of pea-sized salmon eggs, luscious cream cheese, fresh dill and pickled shallots — a beautiful array of flavors befitting such a great bagel foundation.
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    Deli Divine

    Mabel Suen

    9. Deli Divine

    Ben Poremba’s restaurants are wonderful. He serves delicious food and drinks and always offers great hospitality. However, what makes them so special — as in the case of Deli Divine (5501 Delmar Boulevard) — is that he puts his heart and soul into making immersive experiences, creating little worlds that tell a rich story of food, yes, but of who we are as a people. This is what I found most striking about Deli Divine.

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    Deli Divine’s assortment of baked goods doesn’t disappoint.

    Mabel Suen
    Granted, I had some wonderful items — bagels, schmear and lox are as traditional as you’d find in a New York City Jewish deli; fat-slicked, peppery pastrami on rye with mustard is the quintessence of the form; and the souffle-like kugel feels like you are eating at Grandma’s house — but what impressed me most about this vital restaurant and shop is how perfectly Poremba and his team are able to bring to life such an important part of American Jewish food culture. This is not a take on a New York-style Jewish deli. This is a New York-style Jewish deli, through and through. That we have such a place in St. Louis is testament to his undeniable gift, not simply as a restaurateur but as a storyteller.
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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen

    8. My Marie

    Marie Louis-Jeune has been cooking since she was five years old and living in Port-au-Prince, Haiti, first as a way to help out around the house after her mother passed away and eventually as a way to support her family through her obvious culinary gifts. You can taste this deep experience and undeniable, inherent talent in her cooking at My Marie (3147 Cherokee Street), which opened in south city this September after a four-year run in Cape Girardeau.

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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen
    Louis-Jeune makes the sort of soul-stirring food that feels passed down through generations. Oxtails come off the bone with just the slightest fork prod and bob in a jus so rich it’s as if you distilled the entire idea of how beef should taste, while handmade patties embody Haiti’s quintessential street food. Every last dish tells the story of the country’s rich culinary traditions — one that Louis-Jeune has made a page-turner.
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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen

    7. Vicini Pastaria

    Part of the charm of Vicini Pastaria (1916 Park Avenue) is in the space itself. Tucked into a gorgeous Lafayette Square storefront, the small, counter-service restaurant feels equal parts Venetian salon and Tuscan farmhouse kitchen. It’s a stunning setting for chef and owner Dawn Wilson’s wonderful, pasta-focused Italian cuisine — something she has been perfecting for decades, ever since she fell in love with the Italian way of eating while honing her craft in that country’s slow-food-focused establishments.

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    Pasta is the backbone of everything she does at Vicini; all of her noodles are handmade so that they have the perfect texture and chew, just as it's done in the old country. Her specialty is pici, a hand-rolled Tuscan-style noodle similar to a thick spaghetti. Used in either cacio e pepe or, when she has it, slicked with verdant pesto, it's a soul-stirring reminder of why small-batch, simple Italian cuisine is one of life's biggest thrills.

    Mabel Suen
    Pasta is the backbone of everything she does at Vicini; all of her noodles are handmade so that they have the perfect texture and chew, just as it’s done in the old country. Her specialty is pici, a hand-rolled Tuscan-style noodle similar to a thick spaghetti. Used in either cacio e pepe or, when she has it, slicked with verdant pesto, it’s a soul-stirring reminder of why small-batch, simple Italian cuisine is one of life’s biggest thrills.
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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen

    6. Fleur STL

    A lot of eyebrows raised when chef Tim Eagan announced he would be turning the beloved St. Louis greasy spoon Eat-Rite into an elevated diner concept. It seemed like sacrilege, but any doubts flew out the window once Eagan started putting out his marvelous food. The new Fleur STL (622 Chouteau Avenue) still has that classic diner feel, though now it’s polished.

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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen
    This also applies to Eagan’s wonderful service — on any given day he’s cooking, serving and chatting with guests as he goes — as well as the food, which includes an artful (but still satisfying) rendition of a slinger, excellent biscuits and gravy and a double cheeseburger that will knock your socks off. There isn’t a more worthy successor to such an iconic place.
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    1929 Pizza and Wine.

    BRADEN MCMAKIN

    5. 1929 Pizza & Wine

    Not all that long ago, Wood River’s historic downtown was little more than a collection of buildings in various states of disrepair — including the burnt-out shell husband and wife Matt and Amy Herren were talked into taking over and converting into a pizzeria. Thanks to their skill in creating both delicious food and a community gathering place, the Herrens have turned that once-forgotten district into one of the bi-state area’s essential destinations for wood-fired pizza.

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    BRADEN MCMAKIN

    BRADEN MCMAKIN
    The key to the success of 1929 Pizza & Wine (7 North River Avenue, Wood River, Illinois) lies in the beautiful marriage of Matt’s baking prowess and Amy’s culinary genius, which results in a crust that manages to get the thinness of a Neapolitan-style pizza in the center while remaining crunchy on the bottom; its outside edges are leopard-spotted and puffy like the classic version, but they rise a little higher and have a bit more heft and depth of rustic flavor. It’s a perfect canvas for Amy’s outstanding toppings, such as the fiery sausage and peppers, a fantastic pepperoni and a decadent masterpiece of a four-cheese pizza that should make all other cheese pizzas hang their heads in shame.
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    Tilapia plate with grilled whole tilapia fish marinated in stew sauce with sautéed bell peppers and onions, served with a side of cole slaw or sautéed veggies, jollof rice and plantains.

    Mabel Suen

    4. Levels Nigerian Cuisine

    Ever since he moved to St. Louis from Lagos, Nigeria, as a teenager, Ono Ikanone dreamed of opening a place where he could share his country’s cuisine and culture with his adopted hometown. That vision has been realized in the dazzling Levels Nigerian Cuisine (1405 Washington Avenue), a vibrant and transportive showcase of the pure joy that is the thrilling West African food tradition.

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    The dining room and bar.

    Mabel Suen
    Ikanone, his wife and business partner Justice Johnson and executive chef Ruqaiya Adeyemo are fearless in their commitment to doing things just as they are done in Nigeria; though they say they have tempered the spice for the American palate, expect a heat that still electrifies your taste buds — in the best way possible. The jollof rice — a particularly special memory from Ikanone’s childhood and a staple of Nigerian culture — is a standout, as is the glorious pepper soup with tender goat meat, one of the most soul-stirring stews you’ll find in town. Enjoying these culinary delights as Afrobeats music videos play and West African art and photographs capture your eyes is nothing short of magical.
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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen

    3. Sado

    Six years ago, Nick Bognar returned to St. Louis and his culinary roots, recasting a beloved west county mainstay, the late Nippon Tei, as more than just a great sushi spot and transforming our idea of what is possible in this landlocked, Midwestern city. Sado (5201 Shaw Avenue) is the natural outgrowth of Bognar’s vision — a restaurant that feels as if it’s what the brilliant chef was always meant to be doing.

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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen
    At this Nippon Tei successor (the west county storefront closed last December), Bognar shows us that, yes, it is possible to get world-class sushi in St. Louis, and he dazzles at every turn with melt-in-the-mouth, delectable seafood delights that set the bar for the form. However, Sado excels equally at its hot and cold tastings, including the chawanmushi, a luscious seafood custard that is one of the most decadent bites offered in the bi-state area — a magical offering from one of the country’s brightest culinary stars.

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  • Find St. Louis’ Best Sushi at Sado on the Hill

    Find St. Louis’ Best Sushi at Sado on the Hill

    St. Louis’ best sushi can be found in an unexpected spot: right in the middle of the city’s Italian neighborhood. Sado (5201 Shaw Avenue, 314-390-2883) has been dazzling diners since it opened in what used to be Giovanni’s on the Hill earlier this year.

    Owned by acclaimed chef Nick Bognar, Sado serves world-class sushi and other Japanese cuisine. The RFT’s Dining Critic Cheryl Baehr loved everything about the spot but paid special attention to the chawanmushi, a custard flavored with dashi and topped with a generous amount of seafood, calling it “a contender for the best bite I’ve eaten all year.”

    To read her review, check out “Sado Offers World-Class Sushi on the Hill.” And scroll through photographer Mabel Suen’s photos below to sample Bognar’s dishes with your eyes.

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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen
    Sado’s highlights include a salmon aguachile with cucumber aguachile, apple, jalapeno and puffed rice.
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    Mabel Suen

    Mabel Suen
    Sado also serves a variety of rolls.
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    Mabel Suen
    Sado is located in what was previously the classic Italian spot Giovanni’s on the Hill.
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    Mabel Suen
    The menu consists of “cold tastings,” “hot tastings,” nigiri and sashimi and more.
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    Mabel Suen
    Chef Nick Bognar.
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    Mabel Suen
    Acorn squash tempura with miso caramel.
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    Mabel Suen
    A variety of makimono are available.
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    Mabel Suen
    Issan hamachi with coconut naam pla, Thai kosho and candied garlic.
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    Mabel Suen
    Sashimi offerings are among the freshest in town.
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  • Cut! Closed Movie Theaters in St. Louis Area

    Cut! Closed Movie Theaters in St. Louis Area

    Heading to the multiplex this summer? Before the days of $9 movie tickets and $5 popped corn, one could probably spend two bits going to one of these movie houses. Here are selected movie theaters from around St. Louis, some long since shuttered. There may still be some popcorn on the floor though.

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    The old Majestic Theatre, 240 Collinsville Avenue, in East St. Louis, Illinois. Click ahead to the see what it formerly looked like.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    The old Majestic Theatre, 240 Collinsville Avenue, in East St. Louis, Illinois. Click ahead to the see what it formerly looked like.
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    Here is a 1920s postcard of the place, back when ESTL's downtown was busier than it is today.

    www.cinematreasures.org
    Here is a 1920s postcard of the place, back when ESTL’s downtown was busier than it is today.
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    A wide-angle shot of the theater. East St. Louis had more than 25 movie houses over the years, though many have long since been closed and or demolished. Others have been converted into other commercial businesses.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    A wide-angle shot of the theater. East St. Louis had more than 25 movie houses over the years, though many have long since been closed and or demolished. Others have been converted into other commercial businesses.
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    Heading north into the Metro East is the Wildey Theatre in Edwardsville. Built in 1909, it closed in 1984 after more than 400 people attended the final screening, the movie "The Big Chill." It is undergoing renovations now.

    By Katie Lopez
    Heading north into the Metro East is the Wildey Theatre in Edwardsville. Built in 1909, it closed in 1984 after more than 400 people attended the final screening, the movie “The Big Chill.” It is undergoing renovations now.
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    ...But theater's owners apparently are still looking for a tenant.

    By Katie Lopez
    …But theater’s owners apparently are still looking for a tenant.
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    The Melvin Theatre, at 2912 Chippewa Street. Now a church, the theater opened in 1914 and sat 481, according to historian Charles Van Bibber.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    The Melvin Theatre, at 2912 Chippewa Street. Now a church, the theater opened in 1914 and sat 481, according to historian Charles Van Bibber.
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    Now a grocery store, this building on 12th Street in Soulard formerly was a movie theater. A couple hundred chairs used to occupy the parking lot to the south for outdoor viewings.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    Now a grocery store, this building on 12th Street in Soulard formerly was a movie theater. A couple hundred chairs used to occupy the parking lot to the south for outdoor viewings.
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    The former Avalon Cinema, which closed in 1999. Located on Kingshighway, the owner of the movie house was profiled in the RFT in July 2007. Read the story, Fade to Black.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    The former Avalon Cinema, which closed in 1999. Located on Kingshighway, the owner of the movie house was profiled in the RFT in July 2007. Read the story, Fade to Black.
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    The Avalon.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    The Avalon.
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    The Hi-Pointe Theatre, recently shuttered for renovations.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    The Hi-Pointe Theatre, recently shuttered for renovations.
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    The Hi-Pointe.

    By Nick Lucchesi
    The Hi-Pointe.
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  • Top 5 Gooey Butter Cakes in St. Louis, Chosen by Our Critic

    Top 5 Gooey Butter Cakes in St. Louis, Chosen by Our Critic

    Courtesy Park Avenue Coffee

    Park Avenue is a gooey butter powerhouse.

    Bob Ross may be known for the phrase “happy accidents,” but there is perhaps no better accident than when a St. Louis baker biffed the butter proportions in a cake recipe, resulting in our fair city’s most iconic dessert (at least of the non-frozen variety). In the near century since that fateful error, gooey butter cake has become synonymous with St. Louis, serving as much as a source of civic pride as it is a way to keep your dentist in business. You can find a version of the dish in every respectable bakery, grocery store and home kitchen in town, but these five spots are consistently turning out the area’s best versions.

    Russell’s on Macklind

    “Restrained” might not be the first word that comes to mind when describing gooey butter cake, but that’s what makes the version at Russell’s on Macklind (5400 Murdoch Avenue, 314-553-9994) so special. With a slightly crisp shortbread-style crust and thinner layer of goo than most, this is the one you can eat in its entirety without feeling like your teeth are going to fall out.

    Park Avenue Coffee

    What started as a quaint Lafayette Square coffee shop has morphed into a gooey butter powerhouse. Park Avenue Coffee’s (multiple locations including 1919 Park Avenue, 621-4020) Mom’s Traditional is the gold standard of the form, perfectly blending cakey softness and buttery goo in equal parts.

    Gooey Louie

    Though you can find gooey butter cake in just about any bakery in town, Gooey Louie (11266 Olive Boulevard, Creve Coeur; 314-473-1800) is the only place that has been bold enough to make the confection its only offering. This dedication to the form means the bake shop can offer just about any variety under the sun, though its original is hard to beat.

    Yolklore

    Before opening Yolklore (8958 Watson Road, Crestwood; 314-270-8538), Mary Boehne cut her teeth as the pastry chef for the Four Seasons Hotel St. Louis. It’s no wonder, then, that alongside her wonderful breakfast and lunch fare are some of the area’s most incredible pastries, including her outstanding version of the St. Louis classic.

    Missouri Baking Company

    True to the coffee-cake nature of the form, Missouri Baking Company’s (2027 Edwards Street, 314-773-6566) traditional rendition of the St. Louis classic takes on a decidedly Italian flair thanks to the bakery’s addition of almond paste. It’s a subtle tweak that results in a transcendent taste.

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  • Complaints About Victor Goines Preceded Jazz St. Louis Conflict

    Complaints About Victor Goines Preceded Jazz St. Louis Conflict

    Cedric Ellsworth

    Jazz St. Louis named Victor Goines its new president and CEO last year.

    Not long after the RFT published an article detailing allegations from employees and volunteers about troubles at Jazz St. Louis under new president and CEO Victor Goines, former students of Goines reached out with a common response: sounds familiar.

    They say the stories about Goines exploding in anger at Jazz St. Louis’ Young Friends Board — and other incidents that had some local staff members and volunteers alarmed — echoed their experiences.

    His former Northwestern students say Goines alternated between being absent and micromanaging, often subjecting students to angry outbursts. A Juilliard graduate reports a hostile environment where another instructor would warn her away when Goines was in a foul mood.

    Goines, 61, is an accomplished musician who has played with Wynton Marsalis since childhood. He served as artistic director of Juilliard Jazz, which he’d helped found, from 2000 to 2007 and as the director of jazz studies at Northwestern University from 2007 until last July.

    In both cases, Goines’ former students report that his departure followed groups of students reporting concerns about his behavior to administrators.

    “When you meet him, initially, he’s always very cordial, very nice, very personable, approachable, but the minute you get in deep with him in terms of in a professional setting for a long term or an education setting with students, that’s when things turn really, really negative,” says Erica von Kleist, a Juilliard graduate who has played at the Jazz at Lincoln Center Orchestra and is an instructor at the Manhattan School of Music.

    When asked to comment on allegations about Goines’ tenure, Northwestern Director of Media Relations Hilary Hurd Anyaso said via email on May 3, “[W]e do not comment on personnel matters.” In April, Juilliard Director of Communications Allegra Thoresen directed the RFT to an article detailing Goines’ plans to focus on his music. Thoresen indicated today that the school did not have further comment.

    In response to a detailed list of questions, Jazz St. Louis Board Chair Bill Higley issued a statement in support of Goines, writing: “As part of the search process that led us to hire Victor, the Board sought input from colleagues who know him well, including during his time as a tenured professor at Northwestern. We received overwhelmingly positive reports demonstrating not just Victor’s qualifications but his commitment to our values of diversity and inclusion.”


    The arts are rife with cliches of tough and sometimes harsh directors and teachers who turn out peerless musicians. Goines — and many of his supporters — seemed to place himself in that category.

    “I would talk to some people about his behavior, and they would just be like, ‘Oh, yeah, that’s just the way he does things.’ And certainly some of the older generation of players were like, ‘Yeah, but, you know, he gets results, and that’s the way that he’s decided to do things,” says Mikey Ahearn, a second-year graduate student at Northwestern. “He had this whole joke about, ‘This is why the boss has to be an asshole.’”

    Higley has a similar idea, writing in a statement that Goines has a “more direct leadership style” that will “necessitate a period of adjustment.”

    But did Goines’ behavior get results? Five of his former students say no, and Northwestern teacher evaluations shared with the RFT seem to back them up.

    The problems with the Northwestern jazz program began with Goines’ absences. His students report he spent a significant amount of time away on tour, which caused logistical problems — even as he insisted on having all decision-making power.

    “He was away for most of rehearsals,” a former student says. “He would try to micromanage the logistics of everything via email or phone, and it just wasn’t really working.”

    Von Kleist says that pattern dates back to Juilliard. “Not only was he not overseeing the functionality of the program because he was there intermittently, when he was there, if there was any confusion or anything wasn’t going right, he would be angry at the students,” she says. “He’d be angry at us, and he would let us know how awful we were.”

    Goines would sometimes fall asleep in rehearsal after returning from touring, which could lead to tension. One student says Goines had “outbursts” from time to time, especially when “overworked and sleep deprived” but that “as long as he felt like he was on the moral high ground, then it was OK.”

    “I’ve had lessons where he’s falling asleep because he is tired from touring,” a different student says. “Then I’ve had lessons where I just never had a shot of it being a good lesson because he was pissed off going into it.”

    Northwestern teaching evaluations shared with the RFT show similar sentiments. “[P]rof Goines is rarely present – when he is, he’s in a flurry trying to fix and adjust things, only to disappear again as quickly as he came,” one wrote after the spring 2022 semester. Another wrote that Goines “was absent the majority of the quarter and would sometimes doze off or leave unexplainedly [sic] when he was present.”

    Goines’ Northwestern students also take issue with the jazz program he designed. They say the curriculum was not differentiated enough from the classical music program and did not include a jazz theory sequence. (Northwestern did not respond to an email last week asking for comment on those complaints.)

    Students were also frustrated by the hurry-up-and-wait push-pull caused by his absences.

    “We didn’t know what we were playing until like two weeks before the show,” one student says. “We’d have three rehearsals a week that, at that time, were not managed well because Goines was absent. And we were just sitting there kind of twiddling our thumbs playing different songs until eventually we had like crunch time, and all of a sudden he decided our setlist and then he got angry at us for not knowing the music.”

    The teacher evaluations, which are public to everyone at Northwestern, reflect these statements. Students from the winter 2021 semester said, “This quarter was — in general — a failure.” “NUJO made jazz not fun for me.” “[T]ough environment in rehearsals.”

    From spring 2021: “poor directorial management,” “Consistently disorganized. We are treated by Mr. Goines like children and are frequently made examples of and talked down to in a demeaning and unhelpful manner.” “Woefully underwhelmed by jazz orchestra.” “Everything that went wrong with the winter quarter has happened again.”

    The trend continued in spring 2022, though there are fewer overall: “Oh man, what to say that hasn’t already been said. I think we should take a second look at how we are handling this class’s instruction. Structure is lacking.”


    What’s the difference between talk that’s tough and abusive?

    Von Kleist says that Goines was “punitive in his demeanor” toward students at Juilliard, that he’d open rehearsals by saying things like, “You are the most disrespectful students I’ve ever had.” She continues, “He would say things like, ‘You were the most ungrateful, immature people, young people I’ve ever worked with.’” Even so, she says he was angry but calm, and she only witnessed him raising his voice a few times.

    It was different at Northwestern. The students there say Goines semi-regularly yelled at them in rehearsal or over the phone and that he’d make threats in the heat of the moment.

    “He would bully us; he was incredibly emotionally abusive to a lot of us and would throw a tantrum when he’d been away on tour for three, four months and then came back and couldn’t micromanage everything,” Ahearn says. “He’d get into shouting matches with us for no apparent reason other than to just assert some kind of dominance.”

    An undergraduate said Goines would use the Socratic method with his students and then get frustrated if they didn’t furnish the correct answer, describing how Goines’ temper would flare, and he’d raise his voice. “It would just kind of be sudden and unexpected.”

    The student describes an incident in rehearsal, saying Goines liked to close the door and have what he called a “come to Jesus” moment. Once, when displeased with a recent concert performance, Goines told the students that they weren’t motivated and not practicing enough. The student made a suggestion about submitting videos of practice and Goines said that was too strict and boxed in, going so far as to compare it to slavery.

    “I was like, ‘Whoa,’” the jazz student recalls, saying that they replied that Goines’ statement was an over-exaggeration and a fallacy. “Then [Goines] said, ‘You don’t have to contribute to the conversation.’”

    During the discussion, the student says Goines raised his voice and laughed in the student’s face. “It was demeaning,” the jazz student says. “… He got extremely defensive, like, ‘What are you saying? I’m part of the problem?’”

    A third student describes how Goines went up to a student in rehearsal and started “aggressively clapping in his face,” and told the room, “If you guys don’t play well, ‘I’ll be Whiplash” — referencing the 2014 movie about an abusive music instructor.

    “It’s just an absurd comment to make for anybody to model any of their teaching off of that movie,” the student says, noting that Goines was never physical with them.

    Goines’ temper, Ahearn says, often came up when someone questioned him. “He would start off speaking kind of naturally. And then you’d suggest an alternative or maybe question a bit further. And he’d go nuts.”

    Von Kleist says that Goines’ temper was so known that her private instructor, the late Joe Temperley, would warn her if Goines was in a bad mood. “He would call me and say, ‘Hey, you might want to avoid Victor because he’s just on a rampage,’” she says.

    Ahearn, who is non-binary and had used a move from London to Chicago to study jazz and “live a little more authentically,” says initially Goines was supportive and OK with them wearing dresses during performances. Yet, “the more I spoke to him about it,” the more Goines seemed to misgender Ahearn.

    When Ahearn brought up these issues with Goines, Goines asked if Ahearn had considered it might be difficult for others.

    “And had I considered that maybe, you know, I don’t have to wake up every morning and pick up a gun and fight in Ukraine?’” Ahearn recalls. “I said, ‘Well, I do have to risk my life because every time I walk out the door, I might not come back. The only choice I’m making here is whether to live authentically or not.”


    Several students who spoke with the RFT about Goines had either considered dropping out of the program or actually had.

    “I think the environment was such that people found it easier to quit and not say anything rather than face any potential repercussion,” Ahearn says.

    Two of the undergrad students who spoke with the RFT left the jazz program. One dropped the major but picked it up again after hearing Goines was gone.

    “I thought about coming back,” a third student says. “This is something quite sad — or was quite sad to me and now I’m OK with — I think my interest in pursuing music professionally is gone. I don’t know if I can fully say that Goines took it out of me.”

    Von Kleist says that she cried in the bathroom after rehearsal almost daily and that she couldn’t listen to a jazz record for five years after graduating. “They were so soured for me, they gave me such a pit in my stomach because I associated school with them,” she says. “… He really nearly killed my love of this music.”

    About a year after she graduated in 2004, Von Kleist says she declined to take part in a group of jazz students who’d gone to make a formal complaint about Goines to then-President Joseph W. Polisi because she was “so traumatized that I can’t even be in that building.” But she is sure the meeting happened.

    Reached by phone on Tuesday, Polisi said that he couldn’t recall the incident and that he can’t comment on it.

    Ahearn says that it was difficult to say anything about Goines because he is a famous, well-connected musician and because he’d alternate between generosity and verbal abuse.

    “No one would believe us,” Ahearn says. “Like we’d go out maybe after a concert, and he would treat all his friends to this wonderful meal, and they would think he was so friendly. And so wonderful.”

    Then, in another moment, he’d lose his temper at the students.

    “[Goines] threatened people with not not having a future in the program because of not knowing one simple thing or you’d get phone calls about how you were really fucking up and then a phone call later, asking you how your life was going and him telling you to just treat him as another guy when he just kind of ruined your entire self esteem,” Ahearn says.

    Ahearn never reported Goines’ behavior to Northwestern. But the other three students say that they did and that a group of other students did as well.

    “[The assistant dean’s] response was always, ‘Yeah, we’ve heard this before,’” one student says.


    How Goines came to leave Northwestern and how he ended up at Jazz St. Louis is not clear.

    In an interview with the RFT last August, Goines said that he’d retired from Northwestern because “it’s a good time to hand the football off to somebody else.” At that time, Goines said he was aware of the opening at Jazz St. Louis but that he didn’t apply for it immediately.

    “However, in the past month or two, some information was coming to me that made me reconsider and look at it through a different lens,” Goines told the RFT.

    Ahearn says that they and others didn’t hear about Goines’ departure at the end of the semester. Instead, in a letter dated August 25, Dean Toni-Marie Montgomery announced that Goines had left and that an interim director had been appointed.

    “I am writing to share the news that Professor Victor Goines has resigned, effective July 31, from his positions as a member of the faculty in the Bienen School of Music and as Director of the Jazz Studies Program. We are grateful to Professor Goines for his contributions during his 14-year tenure in the Bienen School of Music,” Montgomery writes.

    Then the Northwestern students saw that Goines had landed at Jazz St. Louis — and, as weeks turned to months, read that some jazz supporters here were having similar experiences.

    “It was interesting seeing the parallels,” one Northwestern student notes, later saying, “I just wanted to make aware that this is a pattern about Mr. Goines.”

    This story has been updated.

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