So Where Do You Get a Vuvuzela in This Town?

The rise of the vuvuzela has been nothing short of astonishing. Last week, nobody outside South Africa had even heard of the things. This week, they have spawned outrage and jokes and even iPhone apps. Next week, they may even be banned. What a trajectory!

Of course we all know the vuvuzela's popularity is due almost entirely to its name. Why else would anybody care about a plastic horn? You don't see that kind of love for its American cousin, the kazoo, do you?

But now the question remains: How can you get a vuvuzela in St. Louis -- soon, before the World Cup is over and they go out of fashion?

Riverfront Times' intrepid World Cup correspondent Keegan Hamilton, who has been bravely getting up at the ass-crack of dawn every morning to drink beer and cheer and blog about it over on Gut Check, reports seeing one at the Old Post Office downtown during the broadcast of the England-USA match last Saturday afternoon. That's it. Just that lone vuvuzela, provenance unknown.

There are a number of stores in the St. Louis area that sell African goods. Most of those goods turned out to be food and clothes, but there was the African International Store. I will spare you the suspense: He didn't have any vuvuzelas. (It's quite possible he didn't even know what a vuvuzela was.)

Did you know there are 105,000,000 Google hits for vuvuzela?

The website appears to be a general portal for vuvuzela purchasing. Sadly, the $7.99 vuvuzelas at the first two outlets, Big Soccer Shop and EuroSport, are on backorder and won't be available until the end of June, by which time the World Cup will be almost over and so will the vuvuzela's fifteen minutes of fame. But you can still get a $9.99 vuvuzela at and, if you're willing to pay $42.78 in shipping, you can have your vuvuzela as soon as tomorrow! (It does not, unfortunately, qualify for FREE Super Saver Shipping.)

It's also possible to get a sock for your vuvuzela for a mere 37.50 rand. (That's $4.94. A total bargain!)

Meanwhile, Cards Diaspora reports that Cardinals Chairman Bill DeWitt has announced that the his team will be the first in the MLB to hold Vuvuzela Night, which will take place (naturally) when the Cubs come to town in August.

"We understand that the Vuvuzela doesn't have the popularity of a magnetic schedule or hastily designed Ice Mountain poster... but there was a day that the MLB didn't have Dominican's either and that's worked out for the Cardinals" DeWitt said before taking a deep pull off his custom Cardinal Vuvuzela.

He added "Besides- we're the fucking Cardinals. You'll blow when we tell you to."