The Missouri Legislature Wants A Bigger Bang

click to enlarge Sometimes they're duds -- just like cheap firecrackers.
Sometimes they're duds -- just like cheap firecrackers.
Missouri legislators can drag their feet on health care and waste time with some stupid shit, but goddamn can they come together and make some laws when the cause is just. SB835 didn't get a lot of press this year, but both the Senate and the House were in agreement that this thing needed to become a law as soon as legislatively possible -- sooner, even. Faced with little time, the Senate voted 33-0 in favor of the bill; the House went 125-0 on its vote on the very last day of the legislative session. Then Governor Jay Nixon signed it with an emergency clause, meaning SB835 became a law as soon as he inked it.

What does SB835 do again?

SB835 updates Missouri fireworks laws to comply with federal regulations, legalizing some of the larger fireworks in our home state. But no, despite what you're hoping, it does not legalize M-80s, M-100s or even the awesome M-1000 for consumer use. It does let people with commercial licenses fire 16-inch shells, however, so civic fireworks displays might be bigger and louder than ever before.

There's a metaphor buried in there somewhere. Give our legislators an issue that impacts citizens lives and they squabble and bicker and get nothing done, but when it comes to making noisy patriotic displays noisier and more patriotic and they leap into action with admirable unity.