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Summer in St. Louis: Have an Adventure 

Page 5 of 45

You choose to stuff your face with leftover Imo's (tasty!) and head to Forest Park to bomb the streets around Art Hill on your skateboard.

Bad move. The park is packed, and Art Hill has more traffic than you might see all summer. Stressed-out county moms in their minivans are all desperately angling for that last free curbside spot. As you skate, you're hit by a Ford Expedition trying to back in while three kids in the back fight over an iPad.

You tumble over the vehicle and into the street, where you're hit by a Chrysler Pacifica, with yet more kids squawking in the back seat. And just as you stagger to your feet, a literal nightmare screeches before you: A Chevy Traverse with Illinois plates and a Joy FM sticker. There's no way you can survive this encounter. You stumble to your knees and beg God to forgive you your sins, because your life is over.

Better luck next time. Try again by restarting on page 1.

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July 29, 2020

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