Say Goodbye to These Annoying Things About St. Louis Summer


It's hot. We're hot. You're hot. The humidity is making it way hotter. Can anyone turn the AC on? Will we get a flash flood that makes it cooler out but ruins our home in the next four hours? There's just so much that goes into summer in St. Louis that is downright annoying — and has potential to threaten our lives. Instead of being sad the long days are behind us, we should look forward to things we won't miss about summer in St. Louis.
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The amplified smell of rotting garbage in alleyways.
RYAN KRULL

The amplified smell of rotting garbage in alleyways.
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The rowdy drunkards on float trips who blast country music and clog rivers.

The rowdy drunkards on float trips who blast country music and clog rivers.
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The stifling humidity.

The stifling humidity.
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The relentless mosquitoes and coming back in with at least four bites that will itch until at least next summer.
Photo courtesy of Flickr / @turkletom

The relentless mosquitoes and coming back in with at least four bites that will itch until at least next summer.
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Feeling compelled to seize the summer by claiming a patio table when it's actually 110 degrees, there's no shade in sight and everyone is secretly longing for a cool fall happy hour indoors.
Holden Hindes

Feeling compelled to seize the summer by claiming a patio table when it's actually 110 degrees, there's no shade in sight and everyone is secretly longing for a cool fall happy hour indoors.
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Getting into your car and finding it’s a 200 degree oven.
Photo courtesy of Flickr / @dharger9475

Getting into your car and finding it’s a 200 degree oven.
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Traffic backed up for miles outside the Zoo every single weekend.

Traffic backed up for miles outside the Zoo every single weekend.
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Lack of parking downtown during events or Cardinals games.
Bonus point: Being the pedestrian walking miles in the heat to attend an event or game because every parking garage is full.
Reuben Hemmer

Lack of parking downtown during events or Cardinals games.

Bonus point: Being the pedestrian walking miles in the heat to attend an event or game because every parking garage is full.
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Wild youths running rampant downtown and stirring trouble.
Screengrab via Facebook

Wild youths running rampant downtown and stirring trouble.
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Torrential rains flooding vulnerable neighborhoods.

Torrential rains flooding vulnerable neighborhoods.
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The inability to root for any team besides the Rams during football's off-season.
STEVE TRUESDELL

The inability to root for any team besides the Rams during football's off-season.
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Shivering through the Arctic blasts of your office/restaurant/movie theater A/C in your summer duds (when else are you supposed to wear them?)
Photo courtesy of Flickr / @jopoe

Shivering through the Arctic blasts of your office/restaurant/movie theater A/C in your summer duds (when else are you supposed to wear them?)
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Sunburns after a day at Hurricane Harbor.
Photo courtesy of Flickr / @jirka_matousek

Sunburns after a day at Hurricane Harbor.
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Sweating with a crowd of strangers at Hollywood Casino Amphitheater.
Screengrab via Google Maps

Sweating with a crowd of strangers at Hollywood Casino Amphitheater.
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Trying to arrange your work schedule around day camps that don't start til 9 a.m. and end at 3 p.m. and don't offer aftercare. Finally, the kids are back in school!
Photo courtesy of Flickr / @camppinewood

Trying to arrange your work schedule around day camps that don't start til 9 a.m. and end at 3 p.m. and don't offer aftercare. Finally, the kids are back in school!
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Trying to arrange your work schedule so you can cover an endless series of your coworkers' vacations.

Trying to arrange your work schedule so you can cover an endless series of your coworkers' vacations.
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Dodging all those big construction projects right when you're trying to take a road trip (orange barrel hell).
Lindsay Toler

Dodging all those big construction projects right when you're trying to take a road trip (orange barrel hell).
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Long-ass lines at Ted Drewes and Clementine's.
Photo courtesy of Flickr / WordOfMouth.

Long-ass lines at Ted Drewes and Clementine's.
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The burning desire to go to the Tower Grove Farmers Market, but finding you can’t summon the energy on a Saturday morning to get there before it closes at 12:30 p.m.
Courtesy Tower Grove Farmers' Market

The burning desire to go to the Tower Grove Farmers Market, but finding you can’t summon the energy on a Saturday morning to get there before it closes at 12:30 p.m.
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Your neighbors setting off fireworks weeks after the 4th of July.

Your neighbors setting off fireworks weeks after the 4th of July.
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