Announcing the Winner of RFT's First-Ever Haiku Contest

We agonized. We sweated. We narrowly avoided fisticuffs.

But after ten minutes of particularly intense discussions, our judges panel has unanimously agreed on a winner for our very first haiku contest. The honors -- and the Cards' box seats -- go to regular commenter Douche McGee, who wowed our judges with his take on the Department of Conservation officials who attempt to capture prairie chickens in Kansas and bring them back to Missouri for sex.

As McGee's poem reads:

first week to snatch cocks
second week to get the hens
pimpin' ain't easy

Congrats to all the poets who gave it their best. Our judges panel was very impressed by the quality (and quantity) of entries.

And, for the record, a poem by "Thanks!" drew our second-place vote, which, sadly, does not come with Cards' tickets:

Politics play these chicks.
Cocks whip out their dicks.
Now, more birds in the sticks.

Now that's what we call poetry!