Ballpark Village: 10 People Following the Dress Code Who Should Get Kicked Out Anyway

Mar 28, 2014 at 12:00 pm

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Photos by Steve Truesdell

No one wants to see this. Go home.

Ballpark Village is finally here! It's real, it's happening, and you can even wear a jersey most of the time.

Daily RFT realizes we've been a little rough on Ballpark Village's late-night dress code lately. So this story isn't about the people who would get kicked out for wearing the wrong thing. It's about the people who should get kicked out for so many other reasons.

See also: Ballpark Village: Here's What Happens When You Violate Our Dress Code Here are the ten people who are following the dress code but still need to leave:

1. The Shocker Bros

Ballpark Village: 10 People Following the Dress Code Who Should Get Kicked Out Anyway

See that blonde lady on the left giving these guys serious side-eye? That's about how we feel. It's late, kids, time to go home.

2. The Happiest Blues Fans Ever

Wearing a hockey jersey is only allowed at seven Ballpark Village restaurants and bars with dress codes if it's on a game day. And since the St. Louis Blues whooped the Minnesota Wild Thursday night, this jersey is doubly allowed. We think these guys should go find a Blues bar and be with their own people. We're thinking south county?

3. The Juggler

Wearing a hat is only prohibited on the second floor of the Budweiser Brew House, which has three total floors. But it's hard to be impressed by juggling when a lady in assless chaps is riding the mechanical bull at the PBR bar. This guy should probably juggle his way back to the six-year-old's birthday party he came from.

See all the Riverfront Times' photos: Will These People Be Turned Away from Ballpark Village?

4. The Ladies' Man

This guy just looks too fly to be partying with all these youngsters in Cardinals sweatshirts. Plus, he can't wear his sick hat on the second floor of the Budweiser Brew House, and we think the hat really makes the outfit. So go find a bar that appreciates your sartorial smarts, sir.

5. The Newly Engaged Couple

Since these two aren't wearing jerseys, they're allowed anywhere in Ballpark Village after dark. But they look like all they really want to do is bone each other, and we support that. Go home and get busy, lovebirds.

Five more, on page two!