You're going to South by Southwest, right? Or you're already there? One of those things is bound to be true. Well, we here at RFT Music have got some advice for you, and we've managed to format it all into the style of commandments, because one of our favorite things to do is pretend we're angry gods. Or something like that.
For Christ's sake, don't break any of these commandments this year.
So, here they are, the 50 Commandments of SXSW 2013.
See Also: -The 20 Most Overused Terms In SXSW Band Bios
1. Thou shalt not make the mistake of not worshiping the god Doritos.
See the 1st Commandment.
2. Thou shalt not forget you're never getting into Stubb's BBQ.
3. Thou shalt not forget to loudly say "my herpes are roaring" in the middle of a packed show.
4. Thou shalt not forget to forget deodorant, you wouldn't want to smell good.
5. Thou shalt not shout "the dragons are coming" in the middle of Sixth Street unless you're certain they are.
6. Thou shalt not hesitate to tell the guy next to you the traffic is terrible, he probably doesn't know.
7. Thou shalt not fail to respect the Best Wurst carts on Sixth, or the Jesus will strike you down.
8. Thou shalt not fight it: just fall asleep on the curb in front of Pete's Dueling Piano Bar.
9. Thou shalt not forget to ask the homeless: ARE YOU WIFI READY??? (This is a joke about how someone made a homeless person a fucking WIFI necklace to wear.)
10. Thou shalt not let the police tell you you can't build a pillow fort across the street from the Fader Fort.
