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  • Porn Again

    Running 15 minutes late, Marilyn Chambers bursts through the door of VIP with a smile that lights the store all the way to the latex section in back. “Good morning, everyone,” she says, sounding like Julie the cruise director, only with a raspier voice. “How are you all doing?”

    The place is tiny and filled with about a dozen men who scrunch closer together as an equal number rush in right behind Marilyn. Inside and out on the parking lot, they’ve been waiting to meet a pioneer who helped make porn OK for the masses, a woman who’s survived nearly 30 years in the business, much to her own amazement.

    She was 19 when she abandoned Marilyn Briggs to make Behind the Green Door, appropriating the name Chambers from a high-school classmate whose looks she admired. The 1972 movie, shot in 16mm, cost $60,000 and grossed $50 million, making it one of the best moneymakers in box-office history, a porn classic on a par with Deep Throat and Debbie Does Dallas. It didn’t matter that Chambers didn’t speak a single line. It didn’t matter that she was a sexual neophyte, so nervous she smoked a joint before her first scene, a lesbian seven-way. It didn’t matter that the projectionist mistakenly ran the third reel before the second at the San Francisco premiere.

    It did help a lot that Procter & Gamble at the same time coincidentally started selling laundry soap in a box featuring Marilyn cradling a newborn infant, the symbol of Ivory Snow — guaranteed pure. The company, which had shot the photo two years earlier, quickly pulled the box from shelves while Johnny Carson cracked jokes. Marilyn Chambers instantly became America’s nastiest girl next door. She longed for mainstream stardom but never quite made it, coming closest with a starring role in Rabid, an R-rated 1977 horror flick by legendary cult-film director David Cronenberg, whose first choice for the lead was Sissy Spacek. But Chambers, whose acting is certainly no worse than the performances in a typical TV sitcom, proved a natural-born porn queen. Ten years after Green Door, she hit it big again with Insatiable, a 1980 release that became one of the biggest sellers in the early days of video. The film helped establish anal sex as de rigueur in the modern porn production, and it remains her favorite performance. “I felt, probably, the most beautiful,” she says. “I was 28. I was healthy and gorgeous and had the world at my feet, and it showed.” She commanded $100,000 per picture, a fortune in an industry known for paying $1,000 per scene to actresses willing to be penetrated in all kinds of ways for all the world to see.

    Nowadays, she’s 49 and still working. She looks her age — long gone is the flat-chested Marilyn who seduced a nation with her wicked innocence. She no longer receives death threats and no longer travels with the two bodyguards who accompanied her everywhere back in the ’70s. Reviews of her latest two videos, part of a three-picture comeback deal, have been mixed. Some have been vicious. “Marilyn looks old and fat and tries to cover herself using the modified extended cummerbund method in all scenes but is unsuccessful in dispelling the idea that you might need a forklift to turn her over,” writes online porn critic Pat Riley in a review of Still Insatiable, released in 1999.

    The arrows wound. “It hurts so bad,” Chambers confesses. “They’re mocking you, telling you go put your clothes back on. I can’t allow that to happen. It’s stupid. But they’re right. Enough is enough. I’m tired. I’m tired of the bullshit. I don’t mean to sound so bitter. I’m getting too old. I felt like I should have never done the last movies I’ve done.” And so Edge Play, due for release this summer, will be her last film — she swears.

    The money is still good whether the cameras roll or not. Today, Chambers will make more in appearance fees with her clothes on than most X-rated actresses make for a 12-hour shoot. Old or not, Rubenesque or not, Marilyn still packs them in. Chaos briefly threatens as fans crowd the counter where she stands, attired in baggy ivory pants, white sandals and a loose blue shirt, mostly unbuttoned so as to highlight a baby-blue-and-white bustier that threatens to burst at any second. “We have to take it from one direction,” store owner Howard Richman says as he tells the crowd to form a line. “Anyone who would like a Polaroid, they’re $20, and Marilyn will autograph them for you. Who was in line first? I want to be fair to everyone.”

    Something is wrong — Marilyn calls Richman into a stockroom for a brief whispered conference. She insists on signing anything fans bring to her, whether they bought the item at VIP or not. Richman agrees but says his customers get to go first. And everyone gets a signed publicity photo for free. She comes back and proclaims, “I promise I will not leave until I sign anything.”

    First in line is Robert A. Cohn, editor and publisher of the St. Louis Jewish Light, who professes that he’s never been to this place before. Cohn has been reviewing movies more than 30 years and remembers when Green Door garnered serious attention from critics at the New York Times and Broadway produced a musical called Let My People Come that centered on a young woman who made her porn-star ambitions known in a song titled “Linda, Georgina, Marilyn and Me.” Cohn is here because he sees Chambers as part of a progression in cinematic history, along with Mae West, Marilyn Monroe, Bette Midler and Sharon Stone. “She’s clearly an important figure in the social history of the United States,” Cohn says. “Early in the women’s movement, the sexual empowerment of women was an important issue — not just reproductive rights but the whole idea that a woman was entitled to a healthy and exuberant sexuality. She was an important part of the sexual revolution in that she and others empowered women to have an exuberant and spontaneous and fully enjoyable sexuality. What Marilyn Monroe and Marilyn Chambers contributed was, you have these characteristics, you have these longings and these feelings. It’s just as much OK for you to act on it as anyone else.”

    Green Door wasn’t the first porn flick aimed at a mainstream audience, but it stands apart from Deep Throat and other early porn classics because of who Marilyn was, her picture on the soap box and a previous foray into the mainstream when she appeared with Barbra Streisand in The Owl and the Pussycat. “That she would be in a film of this kind was a tremendous breakthrough,” Cohn says. “It was unprecedented. There was this kind of sweet spot in time where films with very, very explicit sexuality might have, quote-unquote, gone mainstream. Marilyn thought it would happen.” Without films such as Green Door, the mainstream today would be a different place. “There never could have been a Basic Instinct or a Fatal Attraction or American Gigolo — which was a quality film with Richard Gere which had full frontal male nudity — with all that explicit sexuality had it not been for those films. They were necessary in their radical departure from the restrictions of the past to empower mainstream films to deal with sexuality.”

    Cohn tells Marilyn what an honor it is meet her and collects her autograph. One by one, the other men thank Marilyn for all those private moments. A fan who says he bought the first VCR sold in St. Louis confesses that he wore out two copies each of Green Door and Insatiable once he upgraded to a machine with fast-forward and rewind on the remote control. Insatiable is a constant topic. “That guy on the pool table …” a fan begins. Marilyn knows what’s coming next. “It’s not Tony Danza,” she answers before he can finish the question. “He has the same tattoo,” the fan exclaims. And he’s dead, Marilyn says, not mentioning his name and not able to recall whether it was AIDS, drugs, a combination of the two or something else entirely. “It’s unfortunate,” she says. “A lot of people can’t survive the business. They can’t.” She pauses. “They just can’t. It’s rough.”

    But the mood is generally light. A portable radio beside the cash register plays oldies — “Margaritaville,” “American Pie,” Sam and Dave singing “Soul Man,” a version Marilyn proclaims better than the Blues Brothers’. And she just loves to sing “Last Kiss” at karaoke (and she can sing, having recorded the soundtracks to at least two of her films). “Where did this song come from?” she asks as J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers croon, “Oh where oh where can my baby be?”

    Chambers pontificates about the glut of porn in America, tens of thousands of videos shot every year on the cheap. “It’s so amazing,” she says. “It’s become savoir-faire. There’s so much product. The problem is, no one makes very much money.” She gives her all with every Polaroid, embracing the fan with her left arm while crossing her left foot behind her right, where she touches just the tip of her sandal to the floor in a perfect glamour pose, even though the photo will only show her from the waist up. She defends her work when a fan asks why she started making X-rated pictures again after a 14-year layoff. “There’s a lot of people out there who want to see someone older with some fat on her who doesn’t have a lot of plastic surgery,” she explains. She worries that patrons at the Diamond Cabaret later that night will be disappointed that she’s only shaking hands and signing pictures. “I’m not performing,” she says. “Who wants to see an old broad perform?” Nor will she ever sign autographs in another adult bookstore after this trip. “This is the last store thing in my life,” she vows.


    Nearly five hours later, Marilyn is still going strong when she arrives at the Lemp Mansion for a formal dinner with 15 fans, each of whom has paid $69 for the privilege. She’s spent the afternoon signing autographs at two VIP stores, in between fighting ever-worsening Friday rush-hour traffic, but she’s had enough time to change into a long black sequined dress with just one button fastened in front.

    She looks marvelous, and the regular jacket-and-tie crowd gawks as she chats with fellow diners in the bar.

    She would like a ginger ale, but none is available. Perhaps she should have a beer, but that wouldn’t be ladylike, would it? Assured by everyone present that she may have anything she likes, she orders a Budweiser. “Bud Light?” the bartender asks. No, Bud, she says. She fishes out a Marlboro Medium while three men look through their pockets for lighters. She has heard all about this place, the rise and fall of the brewery that was once the largest in St. Louis and the litany of Lemps who killed themselves inside the mansion. She is, she says, a history buff and tells the group that her sister is an archaeologist.

    After 15 minutes in the bar, the group moves to the dining area, where Cohn starts things off with a toast to Marilyn, whom he calls the Grace Kelly of adult films. He has to leave early for a meeting but walks away impressed. “There was a poignancy about seeing her after all these years,” he says. “She was a lot like the character Amber Waves in the movie Boogie Nights, a kindly, somewhat matronly person who does sex work, basically. She was very much as I anticipated she would be: middle-class, basically conventional in all her demeanor. She’s gotten on with her life. She was clearly a mature and stable person. But there was clearly something unfulfilled when she looked back. That was what I found to be somewhat poignant about seeing her. It’s almost like Sunset Boulevard — ‘Ready for that close-up now, Mr. DeMille.’”

    Dinner starts awkwardly. The staff has arranged two tables in a private dining room, leaving five decidedly downcast fans to sit staring across a table at each other instead of Marilyn. This won’t do. After everyone has ordered — with all choosing prime rib over chicken — Marilyn summons the headwaiter. These tables must be rearranged so we can all sit together, she insists. The waiter protests mildly, cautioning that moving the tables together could take 30 minutes. That’s bullshit, and Marilyn knows it. Do your best, she tells him, all sweet and polite. Then she invites everyone out to the porch for some air. “We’re going to go get haunted,” she says with a devil-in-Miss Jones smile as she heads into the late-spring evening.

    With the exception of Marilyn’s stunning dress and John, there’s no sign that this group is anything out of the ordinary, perhaps just the hippest cousins and siblings escaping from a large family reunion to live it up for a few hours with a favorite aunt. Marilyn aside, there are three women here, one a VIP employee and the other two brought by significant others. John, who appears about 30 years old, is alone, unsmiling, keeping to himself. On the porch, he stays to one side, away from the crowd hovering around Marilyn, all the while watching from afar. He remains until the restaurant staff, after 10 minutes, announces that the room is ready. Then he sits at the foot of the table, where he can stare wordlessly at Marilyn — no way of knowing whether Travis Bickle or just another lonely guy in love is behind those eyes. His demeanor does not escape Marilyn’s attention. Midway through dinner, she asks whether he’s having a good time. His “uh-huh” response is barely decipherable, more grunt than words. Please, she begs, will you smile? He flashes the briefest of grins, then switches back to inscrutable, prompting a polite laugh from the group, which quickly moves to other subjects.

    Table talk drifts from porn to what-else-have-you-been-doing-lately. She rolls her eyes at the memory of John C. Holmes, on whom the character Dirk Diggler in Boogie Nights is loosely based. Holmes was an awful lay, too coked out to get wood, as they say in the biz, and a test of her patience as he struggled to finish. One scene took seven hours, she recalls. “I kept telling him, ‘C’mon, John, let’s go, hurry up, it’s time,’” she says. Holmes, who died of AIDS in 1988, is remembered today for the size of his penis, his appetite for cocaine and his acquittal on murder charges in a drug-ripoff-turned-bloodbath.

    Someone asks the inevitable: How realistic was Boogie Nights? Not at all, she answers. For one thing, she never considered crew members and fellow performers her friends away from the set. “I mean, hanging out with those people all the time, who’d want to do that?” she asks. Aha, the questioner says, just another example of porn stereotypes, Hollywood making up stories about everyone being on coke all the time. Marilyn stops him. “Most of us were,” she says. Marilyn, who acknowledged a drug problem more than a decade ago, today drives a Lexus with personalized license plates reading “LUV NA.”

    Marilyn doesn’t often do this kind of thing, at least, not anymore. She last made an autograph appearance about a year ago, in Portland, Ore. This two-day trip to St. Louis is a whirlwind tour. She must be back at her house, near Edwards Air Force Base in Southern California, on Sunday, Mother’s Day, which is also her daughter’s 10th birthday. Marilyn will give her daughter a camera. “She’s interested in being on the photographer side of the lens,” Marilyn says firmly. Early next week, she’ll fly to New York, where she is scheduled to tape a segment for the Learning Channel on — what else? — sex. Then there’s her radio show, which she’s been doing five days a week for about a year. So far, it’s in just a few markets — Dallas, Miami, San Diego — but she’s hoping to land a drive-time slot in Chicago soon. The show features astrology, psychics and call-in listeners, who mostly have questions about sex. “It’s not shock stuff,” she says. “It’s not trashy. We try to find different terminology for genitals. We talk about sex, but we don’t say ‘giving head’ or ‘giving blowjobs.’ We don’t have a lot of competition. I personally love radio. I don’t have to dress up.”

    After more than an hour at the table, Marilyn has barely touched her prime rib. She asks a waiter to box it up. Just before dessert arrives, Richman goes to his car and retrieves a grocery bag filled with Marilyn tapes — Green Door, Insatiable, Insatiable II, Still Insatiable, Dark Chambers — there’s plenty to go around, and at a 20 percent discount, no less. Money changes hands, and Marilyn autographs the video boxes, expertly rubbing away the protective wax with a finger to ensure that the “With Lust, Marilyn XXX” will last forever.When she finally rises to leave, everyone tags along beside and behind. She’s already late for a 9 p.m. appearance at the Diamond Cabaret, across the Mississippi River, but she has one last mission here.

    Out on the porch, Marilyn pulls John aside. Leaving the other diners to themselves on one end of the veranda, she and John share a moment together. They embrace passionately and kiss long, unhurriedly, as if at the end of a dream date. John adjusts his grip, pulling her closer. She leans against him. They hug, just standing there, gently swaying, kissing, looking into each other’s eyes, exchanging whispers. An awkward silence falls over the group, reluctant voyeurs who’ve already seen it all but aren’t quite ready for this. After several minutes, Marilyn and John, arm in arm, stroll to the parking lot, where they pose for a Polaroid, he standing behind and holding her with both arms wrapped around her waist, chin resting on her shoulder, prom-style.

    It’s time to go.

    John, ever stoic, walks to his car while the group says its goodbyes. All smiles, Marilyn keeps telling everyone what a wonderful time she had. “Next time,” she says, “why don’t we all just get together as friends?”


    It’s nearly 1 a.m., and nearly 12 hours of being Marilyn Chambers has taken its toll. She’s off in an hour, and she’s ready.

    No longer does she cross her feet for Polaroid after Polaroid with patrons at the Diamond Cabaret, which has hired Marilyn to help celebrate the opening of the topless club’s members-only room. Her dress is buttoned. She’s still on the clock, still a professional, still turns the world on with her smile, but the feet remain flat and the stints on an overstuffed couch grow longer and more frequent as the hours wear. She’s on her second pack of Marlboros now and lamenting what awaits her when she returns to her suite at the Sheraton. She’s tired, she says, but she knows she won’t go to sleep. She’ll just lie there.

    “It’s brutal,” she says. But it never shows. She chats easily with whoever walks up. She spends nearly 30 minutes sitting next to an earnest stranger, talking to him about women and relationships. Only near the end of the conversation does she start digging her fingers into her palms, completely unnoticed by the man, just inches away, who never takes his eyes off her face. Stand up, sit down, stand up, sit down — every few minutes, someone wants her for something. She never gets a chance to finish a Budweiser. I’ve-always-wanted-to-meet-you and could-you-sign-it-“Happy Birthday” and I’d-like-you-to-meet-a-good-friend-of-mine and how-about-if-you-sit-on-my-lap-for-a-picture? A woman in black leather boots and a tight skirt asks whether Marilyn knows so-and-so and invites her over to the house when she’s done here.

    She comes across as just plain folks. When someone panics over a missing bracelet, Marilyn is first to stand and look under her seat cushion. She requests a cigar but gets just a few puffs in before she’s whisked away yet again. “Is it uncouth to relight a cigar?” she asks when she finally returns. No one is quite sure, and if she’s dropping hints, no one jumps to buy her a new one. She gets a light, takes a few more puffs, then leaves it, forgotten, in an ashtray. A cop from a North County department waits patiently on a sofa for well over an hour — he’s willing to sip $6-a-bottle Bud Light until Marilyn has a chance to talk. Meanwhile, he saves her place on the couch and watches her purse. He’s got a miniature teddy bear and chocolate-covered strawberries waiting for her out in the car.

    “Coming here was very difficult for me,” she confesses as the evening winds down. “I thought, ‘Oh shit, I’ve had it with this stuff.’ I know that people expect something that maybe I can’t give anymore. But I will do anything for my fans.” She says you can ask her anything. The mind boggles: The long-ago live performances in San Francisco, where police say Marilyn serviced 20 patrons at a time (prosecutors, however, declined to press prostitution charges); the 10 years spent with husband/manager Chuck Traynor, who wouldn’t let her go to college or smoke cigarettes; the time Jack Nicholson and Art Garfunkel dangled a role in Goin’ South, then asked her for cocaine and wanted to know whether she really got off during Green Door, angering her to the point that she stormed out midway through the interview. One query seems obvious: How did you survive when so many didn’t? She pauses.

    “Sometimes I don’t know,” she says. “I think that having a child really made my life complete. It’s someone I can live for. None of my marriages worked out. I’m very honest, brutally, to a point. Most men can’t handle that. I don’t have a perception of a normal relationship — I’m not sure if anyone does.” Being a porn star makes relationships more difficult in at least one respect. “Telling you that you look great doesn’t mean anything,” she says.

    After three divorces, she says, she’s happy. “I love being alone,” she says. “I don’t have to answer to anybody. It’s my house and my life. I really have to get to work every day, and I never have in my life. I really need that stability in my life. I really love going to work.”

    Tomorrow, Marilyn will sit in yet another adult-novelty store, signing autographs and viewing old movies with fans, reminiscing about just what was happening behind the scenes while she screwed her brains out on cue. Tonight, she thanks the cop for the strawberries and insists that everyone try one. She gets to talking about the old days, when she figured she’d be able to cross over, especially after Midnight Cowboy and Last Tango in Paris won critical acclaim despite their X ratings. Nearby fans offer comfort. She can act, they insist. “But the scripts are awful,” she protests.

    She’s right, of course, but the way she flits her eyes, the sly smile at just the right moment, the tilt of her head — acting is more than just a script, she’s told, and she’s done the best she could with the material she was given. She looks up and smiles.

    “You’re sweet to say so,” she says. “You know what? I need another beer. I don’t want you to buy it — you’ve bought enough.”

    And Marilyn Chambers rises and walks, alone, to the bar.

  • The Last Dance

    Bishop DuBourg High School is quintessential South St. Louis. Subsidized by the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of St. Louis, it’s stricter than those wild public schools, more affordable than the elite single-sex academies, impervious to trends. DuBourg’s not known for anything in particular, yet it carries as much bloodline in its rolls as an Eastern-seaboard prep school: Slay kids go here as a matter of course, and this year’s student-council president, Kevin Butz, follows three brothers through — plus his uncle teaches there and his aunt used to and his grandmother works in the office, and his parents started dating there as sophomores.

    At DuBourg , security is rooted in family and tradition and knowing everybody in your world. Status is belonging to St. Gabe’s parish and living in St. Louis Hills (as opposed to a bedroom-stuffed gingerbread on the wrong side of Hampton Avenue). Fun is generally simple — a softball game, a backyard barbecue, a cruise to Ted Drewes — and it doesn’t change with the generations. Families stay for generations.

    And the planning of the prom is a fresh, giggly half-year process.


    Kent Hediger is nervous. A marketing teacher with the self-conscious, boyish charm of a young Bruce Boxleitner, he’s the senior coordinator this year — which puts him in charge of the senior prom. Veteran teachers regale him with past fiascos and walk away chortling. In late November, he bites the bullet, issuing an open invitation to work on the prom committee. Ice storms lead to the cancellation of the first two meetings, though, and by the time everybody returns to school in January, he’s pacing the halls, corralling the leader types. Shouldn’t they have a theme by now? “How about ‘Space Odyssey 2001’?”

    “Nothing beyond our atmosphere, Mr. Hediger,” Kevin drawls, and bubbly blonde Kelly Regan looks genuinely upset: “See, I’m thinking you guys are thinking that kind of stuff, and I’m thinking — something sweet. ‘Today’s dreams, tomorrow’s memories.’”

    Even Hediger groans.

    “Listen, I’m the first girl after three boys, and my mom’s already planning to go all out,” says Kelly. Her eyes soften. “I’m thinking something long and sparkly and elaborate. I like to dress for elegance and glamour.”

    “I’ve never had occasion to wear a tuxedo before,” Kevin says formally, then breaks down and admits that what he’s “wanted to wear forever is, you know the movie Big, the white-sequined tuxedo? I’ve looked everywhere.” Kelly is intrigued. “One of my brothers had Bugs Bunny on his vest,” she volunteers.

    “Nice,” says Kevin, drawing the word out.

    They talk about flowers, Kelly making sure Kevin knows what’s expected. “Oh, I’m great at flowers,” he assures her breezily. “Those ladies love you; they see you coming and break out the ribbon and say” — he adopts a trembly falsetto — “‘Oh, this will match perfectly!’ I usually just go with the wrist corsage, but someone told me it’s always smart to go with the wrist corsage and the bouquet. You know, ‘Prom’s special. Cost’s no option.’ Yes, it is.” A minute later he says, with a sort of awe, “I heard prom usually costs, like, $300.”

    “I wouldn’t say the sky’s the limit,” counters Kelly, “but I wouldn’t say I’m going to be really tight with it. My family’s always shopped for the best deals, but prom’s not the time for that.”

    Hediger, who has long since abandoned his agenda, listens while they talk about the prom’s dangers: Living all year in a state of suspended excitement, heaping all your fantasies on that one night, being really disappointed. Going wild afterward, throwing up on the party bus, getting thrown out of a hotel room, sliding half-drunk out of your canoe on a predawn float trip. “I don’t want anybody to die on prom night,” Kevin says with sudden vehemence.


    On Jan. 24, at the first official committee meeting, Hediger claims the moral high ground: There will be no mugs or wine glasses as prom mementos, because that encourages alcohol use. The music will be clean and tasteful. Dress, he’s not worried about: “Low-cut is very rare,” he says. “The seniors know what it means to be modest; they go to enough church activities.”

    The nine girls who have showed up to plan their prom shoot alert looks at each other, and class president Val Ricketts dares a smile. Val’s smart and funny, prettier than Emma Thompson, with a long neck and curly blond-brown hair and a horseback rider’s delicate, obvious bones. She’s nice to everybody but not saccharine; the undernote of irony endears her even to rebellious outsiders such as Chrissie Goia.

    Chrissie isn’t really friends with anybody else on the committee; whereas Val and the others came because “prom’s what everybody looks forward to,” Chrissie just hopes volunteering will help her get on the student-activities committee next year at Southeast Missouri State University. High school, she says, has been hell: “I think it’s because I’m from the county and there’s this stereotype here that county kids get everything they want. But I’ve stopped caring what anybody thinks.” Chrissie’s aunt and uncle and dad all went to DuBourg, but she doesn’t even fit in with them. Her family’s nearly all short and dark and Italian-loud; she’s slim and marble-skinned, with a white-blond ponytail, chunky platform shoes and urban attitude.

    When the other girls start suggesting themes, her eyes roll.

    “How about ‘Save the Best for Last,’ because it’s our last dance ever in high school and it’s the best thing you’re going to do?” offers banged, brown-haired Lauren Schulte, who looks like a tomboy one day and Audrey Hepburn the next. “When you think of high school, you will think of your prom.”

    “I’ve been dreaming of prom since I was in sixth grade,” Kelly agrees.

    Everybody does,” says another girl. “This is, like, right under my wedding.”

    They sent their Barbies to prom; watched prom scenes in teen movies; giggled at older sisters and brothers dressed up past recognition, departing in nervous ceremony. Now, finally, it’s their turn. Each harbors a slightly different scenario, but all want the night to be “special,” a break from ordinary time, a ticket that transports them somewhere more enchanted than a low beige-brick building on the corner of Hampton and Eichelberger.

    “I’m really stuck on gazebos,” admits Val, leafing through one of five fat pastel prom catalogs. “I want a gazebo so bad!” Lauren leans to look over her shoulder and quickly sticks a finger into the flipping pages: “This! What is this thing called?” She squints at the text. “A trellis. We could have our photos in front of a trellis with roses….”

    “‘Wish Upon a Star,’” somebody calls. “‘On the Edge of a Dream,’ because we are definitely on the edge of something!” counters Lauren. Then she has a brainstorm: “‘I Hope You Dance.’ Yes! The words it speaks are like lessons; it’s deep. Of course, how many people are really deep thinkers? But I still really like it. We could write that on the T-shirts: ‘When you get the choice to sit it out or dance’ — and then, in big type, ‘I hope you dance.’”

    There’s a murmur of agreement, even though, it’s noted, “not everybody likes country.”

    “What about ‘Unforgettable,’ because our prom’s unforgettable?” suggests Angie LeGrand, a redhead with curvy bangs, translucent fair skin and emotions just as transparent. “It’s a really cool song; I got it off Napster this morning.”

    “‘I Want to Be With You,’” someone proposes, and Angie’s face falls. “We are trying to stay away from lovey-dovey,” she points out, “for us poor single people who don’t have steady boyfriends.” They decide they can’t do “Oh What a Night,” either: “Teachers might be, like, ‘Oh, it’s a sexual song.’” Oddly enough, sex isn’t even in the room at these meetings: Prom’s romance is of a storybook sort, predating any particular boy. This thrill’s about having the door of the limo opened for you, not necking in the back seat.

    They rule out “Almost Paradise” because “it sounds like ‘Oh, this isn’t good enough?’” and “I Stayed Alive” because “it sounds like we clawed our way through high school eating rats.” Chrissie, seated down at the end of the long table, leans forward. “What I like about that one,” she says, “is, not everybody can say they were 100 percent happy with everything the whole time.” There’s a long silence, the first of the meeting. “But still,” Val says gently, “prom’s a happy time.”

    “What about ‘We Danced Anyway’?” suggests Lauren. “We are going to have grandchildren someday, and they are going to be getting ready for their prom, and here we’ll be, all shriveled up, and it’ll make us feel young again.”


    The committee presents a list of theme suggestions to the entire class (Val having reminded them, “People like to be asked”) and “I Hope You Dance” wins by 20 votes, with “Unforgettable” a close second. At the next Wednesday-afternoon meeting, a new issue burns: They all want graceful frosted-glass vases inscribed with the legend “Prom 2001,” but what memento should they order for the boys? No self-respecting DuBourg male’s gonna show up for one of these meetings and offer his opinion, so they’ll have to guess.

    The girls flip through the catalogs again. Would glasses be legal if they had candles stuck in them?

    “They won’t use candles anyway,” predicts Lauren.

    “My brother would,” says Angie. “He’s a huge pyro.”

    “Snow-globe picture frames?”

    Eventually they settle on customized “Prom 2001” Slinkys and make a note to inform Mr. Hediger.

    Now, the biggest question of all: whether to restore the prom-court tradition that’s making a comeback nationwide after decades of plain egalitarianism. “I’m starting to think no,” says Val, “because it’s supposed to be everybody’s special night, and it’s not fair to make it more special for somebody. Maybe we could buy cheap crowns and give them to all the girls — everybody’s a princess.”

    No way; it’d ruin people’s hair, the others say. They all (except Chrissie, who’s ready to gag) like the drama of royalty. Not king and queen, because that’s for homecoming — what about prince and princess? The class votes 97-39 in favor, so the committee decides to crown two sets of princes and princesses, avoiding a pure popularity contest (“Impossible,” mutters Chrissie) by letting the teachers make the initial nominations.

    Later that week, after combing South County Center, Kelly finds her elegant and glamorous dress — “long, light-pink, with a white glittery sheer overlay and spaghetti straps and the back kind of open.” Tiny Kim Hughes, who has a pale French-urchin look and an adorable lisp but could organize the Russian Army, goes all the way to Plaza Frontenac for hers, a coral strapless with sequins and a train and a little beaded shawl. “They send you a thank-you note,” she reports, “and they keep a log so nobody buys the same dress as another girl from their school.”

    All’s going well — except that now it’s spring, and Mr. Hediger, who’s really supposed to be at all the meetings, must coach on Wednesday afternoons. “No problem,” the girls say cheerfully. “We’ll meet at 7 a.m. on Fridays, before homeroom.”

    Hediger pales.


    It’s 6:45 a.m. on the first Friday in March, and the meeting room is locked. Chrissie’s outside, waiting in her car. Kim’s standing in the hall, flipping through Teen Prom, debating whether to buy halogen sandals that shine in rainbow colors. Becky Clark arrives wearing a light, shimmery lip gloss, her hair fresh. “I set my alarm for 4:30 so I’d have time to shower,” she explains, then confides in a rush that she hasn’t found a dress yet. “I went Thursday, but we really didn’t see too much, and I got bored. Besides, my mom wasn’t there, and I know she’ll be honest with me — she’ll say, ‘Oh, Becky, you’ve got a pooch there’ or ‘It makes your butt look big.’”

    This morning, they’re talking about the setting for their prom portraits: Last year’s toppled columns were a disaster. “It was supposed to look like the ruins of Rome,” says Val, “but people didn’t get it. They kept saying, ‘Why didn’t somebody pick these up before prom?’”

    OK, they’ll do French doors. Chrissie volunteers to check out the photographer’s backdrop, although in private she admits she’s still a little disgusted about “this king and queen, or prince and princess, or whatever. I’m totally against courts. Your prom should not be any more special to one person than the rest. They just want it because it’s cute.”

    At today’s meeting, the pressing worry is money: They’re contracted to The Cedars, the Slay-owned banquet hall adjacent to St. Raymond’s Maronite Church downtown, but the cheapest dinner, the buffet, is $28.20 per person, pushing the ticket cost to $40 apiece.

    “Don’t seniors usually have bake sales?” asks Lauren.

    “We can’t do it anymore because of hepatitis,” Kim reminds her.

    So they have to decide whether they can afford their favorite invitations, printed on sealed clear-plastic squares filled with glitter — and what about little table favors of bubble-blowers? “I think we are going a little overboard here,” Val says dryly. “Sticky stuff on the ground? I don’t think they’d like that at The Cedars.”

    Once again, they vote. The bubbles win overwhelmingly, but Val tries one more time: “So even if it comes to raising the price, you still want bubbles?” Nobody even bothers to answer. She sighs: “Bubbles it is.”

    They’re moving back and forth between girlhood and womanhood, fast as a weaver’s shuttle.


    Another 7 a.m. meeting, and Hediger manages to make it by 7:05. He bears good news: $28.20 was for a cash bar all night! Their buffet is only $22.

    He’s not enamored of the Slinky idea, though: “Whaddya think, that guys are just –” He stretches the sample Slinky wide, looking dubious. “Here, I’ll show you what I thought for guys. A simple frame –” he reaches for Anderson’s Prom and Party Catalog, then feels everybody’s eyes on him. “You really want the Slinkys?”

    Lauren sighs like a resigned wife: “Picture frames are fine.”

    Kelly comes in, swinging a bag of doughnut boxes. The girls slide them down the table slapshot, the aromas of chocolate and grease mingling with the scent of fruit-blossom shampoo. It’s time to plan table decorations: How about wreaths of purple flowers around hurricane lamps? Or votive candles floating in bowls with flower petals? And black tablecloths, they all agree, sprinkled with glittery star confetti.

    “Do we want fake flowers or real ones?” asks Kelly. “And who sets up the tables?”

    Turns out they do, that afternoon. “I know you guys get your hair done and your nails and your makeup and everything — takes five hours,” says Hediger, adding, “I don’t know why you guys do that; you guys look nice anyway. But I can’t go; I have to teach the underclassmen, so you will have to handle it.”

    They disperse, Becky muttering to herself, “I’ve got to find a date.”

    “If anybody cares, I still don’t have a date,” Chrissie announces almost cheerfully. “There’s a bunch of people who said they would go with me; I just have to narrow it down, depending on who’s not mad at me that week.”

    That evening, on the phone, she explains high school’s daily hell. “It’s the prejudgment of people,” she says. “They are uncomfortable with themselves. Or maybe they know I’m better than they are and they just don’t want to believe it.” She survives by escaping: “I like to just go for long drives or try to get away from people. And I love to dance. I plan to do nothing but go to dance clubs when I turn 18.

    “DuBourg’s very cliquish,” she resumes. “There’s the freaky people and the middle people and the preppy people, and you have all the jocks on top and all the other people seem to filter down a little bit below that, and none of those people can associate with anybody below them.

    “I really wanted to be on the committee because I figured I’d have a say in making it good,” she adds. “But that hasn’t happened too much, because of Mr. Hediger. He’s being very difficult.”


    Late March. Angie finds her dress, a white halter style with thin straps that crisscross in back and “that annoying poufy material from the waist down.” Now, she just needs a date. “There’s this guy at school I want to go with,” she confides, “and it’s nerve-racking. He’s kind of one of my good friends, and he’s the only one out of all my friends who doesn’t have a date, and so am I. All my friends are saying, ‘Ask Angie,’ but he’s being really stupid about it. He says he’s either going to go stag or just ask somebody the week before. But if he doesn’t ask me three weeks before, I’m just going to have to say something. My little brother told me to forget about Justin, because he doesn’t want me to be his fallback date. I guess I could ask this other guy who goes to St. Louis U. High, but….”

    But she really wants to go with Justin, and all the second-guessing, differing agendas and courtship games are driving her crazy. She’s worried about the limos, too: They only seat six, and a group of 22 friends is going together, plus some of the guys are threatening to invite friends from all-girl Nerinx Hall wherever they go afterward — which is rude. “They think we will never decide what to do,” explains Angie. “We tried to tell them that asking a bunch of girls from Nerinx isn’t exactly making plans for us!

    “I just hope it works out without a lot of hassle,” she finishes fervently. “I won’t have a good time unless all my friends are happy. We’re trying to avoid anything expensive, like renting a cabin for afterward, because some people are real low on cash. And I hope everybody’s hair goes well.”

    Val is dateless too, just less worried about it. Chrissie has decided to go with “my boyfriend — well, my ex-boyfriend. We were together for a year, and then we broke up, a little while ago.” Her parents, she says, don’t approve of him. They’re still friends, though? “I suppose you could call it that.” She sighs. “He’s always been very difficult.”


    Early April, and prom’s only a month away. Val has made sure the prom T-shirts and invitations are on order, but she’s a little distracted, because her mom has to have a hysterectomy. Just five months ago, the mother of Val’s good friend had a hysterectomy but died on the operating table when an aneurysm burst. Still, the freakiness of her friend’s loss is also obliquely reassuring: “If it happened to someone so close, it won’t happen to my mom,” Val tells her friends. “Lightning doesn’t strike twice.”

    Mrs. Ricketts goes through the surgery just fine. But the next morning, a blood clot migrates into her lungs. Val, the youngest in a close-knit family of four girls, gets the phone call at school: Her mother is dead.

    In seven days, she’s supposed to sing her heart out as Maria, the lead in the school production of The Sound of Music. The school cancels the Wednesday-night performance for her, but Thursday she goes onstage.

    The show’s a hit. Afterward, Val crashes. Lauren and Kelly take her out, but they don’t really talk about her mom. They figure she’s doing enough of that with her family. Besides, they don’t know what to say.

    When Val returns to school a few weeks later, an underclassman has stolen her parking space and she’s almost late and she gets a ticket parking on the street and “people want to be nice, so they’re all mushy and hugging me and asking, ‘How are you?’” she blurts. “You don’t want to say, ‘Great!’ but you can’t say, ‘Horrible,’ and make them feel bad, so you just brush it off, which makes them think you’re mad….”

    There’s the grief itself, the hole torn in her safe and happy family, the aching loneliness for her mom. Then there’s the strain of trying to protect everybody else from that grief, because it terrifies them.

    Reading what people write on the sympathy cards for Val, Chrissie decides, “It’s amazing to see how fake people are. ‘I’m here for you’ from people who never even hang out with her — don’t tell her that and then not be there.” Chrissie likes Val a great deal, but something more than the general hypocrisy is eating at her: “I hate to say this, but you already pretty much know she’s going to get it [prom court], because her mom died. We had a girl who got homecoming court last year, after her brother died in a car accident. I’m just sick of people winning stuff through pity and guilt and events beyond their control.

    “My dress is a $30 dress,” she says a few minutes later. “It’s this dark magenta-maroon color, and it’s a halter, and it comes up real high on the neck. My boyfriend said that was going to get on his nerves, and I said, ‘That’s too damn bad. I picked it out, and I look cute.’” She hesitates, again that actressy mix of spikiness and vulnerability. “It’s pointless spending a fortune for a dress you’re only going to wear one night, especially if you are not on prom court — although if I was part of the more cliquey, popular crowd, I probably would.”


    April 20, the last meeting before prom. Becky has found “a Snow White dress” with a lace-up black-velvet bodice and full white skirt — and a date to boot. Val arrives with a burst of energy, pale but trying hard. She throws herself into a chair, reaches into a paper bag and crunches on granola: “So what are we doing?”

    They run through the last-minute arrangements, Val heading off digressions with an impatient “Keep going, keep going.” Toward the end, Hediger gets soppy, telling them all how much they’ve helped him all four years and how, if he could pick the court, it would be all of them. Val smiles back, but her eyes are distant.

    Later she recalls, “The last dance I went to at DuBourg, my date ditched me! I thought that was the worst day of my life. It was actually my mom who told me, ‘If that’s the worst, you’ve got a pretty good life coming at you!’” She sighs. “What a naïve person I was then. And that was only three months ago.

    “This past year has been a blur,” she continues. “My mother’s death jolted everything into perspective. I used to be scared out of my mind to graduate high school, but now it’s such a big nothing. I’ve got life to worry about, not high school. And prom’s — just another thing.” She pauses, and her eyes get that distant look again. “I don’t think it’s going to be as magical as it would have been.”


    Friday, May 4. Prom night. The seniors have the day off — the girls traipsing from hair to nail to makeup appointments, the boys sleeping till 5 p.m. and then showering. Some show up in wingtips and white dinner jackets, some in swallowtail or three-quarter-length coats. Kevin chickens out: no white sequins.

    As for the prophesied modesty, there’s strapless and skintight and a backless, sideless black dress held on by straps as thin as leather shoelaces. “She doesn’t go here,” whispers math teacher Kathy Flood, watching eagle-eyed as the young woman walks, tall and tan and defiant, across the dance floor.

    Later, Flood brightens: According to The Cedars staff, DuBourg’s girls are quite modest compared with the students at Ursuline Academy and Nerinx Hall, who held their proms here last week. Everyone does look lovely, with their hair swept up on top of their heads and their dresses shimmering. One young man follows his date through the crowd, trying to figure out how to hold on to her — waist? hand? shoulder? — and how to slow-dance without stepping on her train. Girls tug nervously at the tops of their strapless gowns and give each other careful hugs, exclaiming with newfound social enthusiasm, “You look fabulous!”

    Angie shows up with neither of the prior contenders but a third young man named Jason. Stubborn Justin comes stag. Chrissie brings not the problematic ex-boyfriend but Tommy Chlebowski, a fresh-faced young man who keeps his hand chivalrously at her waist. Val’s with Charlie, a good friend since sophomore year, and she slips her shoes off in the photo line, relaxed in a way that’s only possible when you’re not with your dream date.

    The Cedars’ owner, Francis R. Slay (the mayor’s papa), stands outside, joking that he may just come to prom, too. The kids smile and keep walking. By 7:05 p.m., everyone’s seated at numbered tables, resigned to the eight-chair seating plan that first struck them as a cruel and arbitrary destroyer of friendships. The doors have officially closed (a reverse 7 p.m. curfew imposed to encourage promptness and safety). But at 7:10, a middle-aged man comes up behind Hediger’s chair and leans down to impart the bad news: “There are tardies.”

    Hediger frowns and rises. But by the time the salads are served, he’s back, his brow clear. “They tried to call,” he says, relieved that he could do, with a clean conscience, what he was going to do anyway, and let them in. The girls eat the mostaccioli and fried chicken just the way Kelly, at one of the early meetings, mimed: tiny careful bites, shoulders rounded in self-doubt and fear of spillage. Then, at a secret signal, chairs scrape and all the young women stand at once, funnel into the hallway and converge on the ladies’ room.

    Flood follows, smiles at the overheard exchanges (“Really, it’s not you — he’s just awkward“) and returns to the table. “One pack of cigarettes,” she murmurs to Hediger as she sits, “and stale smoke.”

    When the ballroom’s full again, the lights dim and triumphant music heralds the double coronation. Prince Chad Templin and Princess Lisa Kuntz walk up first, consciously slowing each step, as a teacher reads their bios into the microphone. A girl whispers loudly to her date, “He’s going to be a priest!” just as the teacher intones, “Prince Chad was recently accepted to Cardinal Glennon Seminary College by Archbishop Justin Rigali.” Applause bursts. Then the second couple start their stately processional: Prince Tim Damazyn and Princess Val Ricketts. More applause, heartfelt.

    As the royal couples begin to dance to the theme song, the teacher beckons, and everyone floods onto the dance floor to join them. Soon all of DuBourg’s seniors are swaying to “I Hope You Dance,” and, for a moment — no matter what they wore or whose arms they’re in — everything is perfect.

    Then the music speeds into “The Tootsie Roll,” and the energy explodes, as though whoever was holding the evening’s reins tight suddenly dropped them and kicked the pace to a gallop. Lauren, looking sweet in a pink dress that’s more sundressy than sleazy, takes the center with her longtime boyfriend, doing practiced spins and dips. Chrissie’s face loses all its pained eagerness and goes rapt as she whirls into and out of her date’s arms like a professional ballroom dancer. Halfway through the night, she gets kicked in the head while swing-dancing, takes an ibuprofen and goes back out on the dance floor.

    In the parking lot, the limos’ engines hum and the party-bus driver sits waiting, hunched with resignation. Some of the kids go to house parties — there’s a big one at Kevin’s house. Others rent hotel rooms or lakeside cabins. Nobody sleeps.

    The next day, they all agree prom was fun, a really good time. Nobody’s using words like once-in-a-lifetime anymore, though. The rite of passage complete, their minds have already flown to graduation and fall’s unprecedented freedom. Kelly is comparing the “packages” offered by William Jewell, where her mom went to college; the University of Tulsa, where her three brothers went; and Benedictine College. Chrissie wants to study business and then open a resort in Gulf Shores, Ala., where her grandparents live. Val’s heading for tiny Spring Hill College in Mobile, Ala., where she’ll play softball and study business, figure out “why people make money and how they are doing it.”

    They’ve crossed the line into adult society, where glitter and gazebos play a limited role and enchantment is always temporary.

    Realizing it is almost a relief.

  • Maybe in Memphis

    Wherever James Cooper Green Jr. goes in Caruthersville, his reputation precedes him. They know his name at the courthouse and at City Hall, at the liquor store and the café. In casual conversation, he tends to reminisce about the town’s violent past, when Caruthersville, Mo., was known as “Little Chicago.” He broaches the subject in the same way other people talk about the weather.

    At his prompting, a woman at the Tigers Hut Café recalls how a bullet flew through her bedroom window when she was a child. The county prosecutor, its intended target, lived next door. Later, a 73-year-old man who once worked for Green’s father recounts how he shot and killed a fellow with a .38-caliber pistol. The boys at a local package-liquor store brag about smuggling machine guns over the state line.

    They’re not lying so much as telling Green what he wants to hear. He revels in the old stories most residents would prefer to forget, tales of bygone days when Caruthersville was the capital of vice in the Missouri Bootheel, times when bootlegging, prostitution and illegal-gambling interests controlled Pemiscot County. It was not so long ago, really. The Climax bar and the Seawall whorehouse have been razed. But other haunts remain: the shady businesses, the former sites of murder and mayhem. Though he left here decades ago, no one knows these places better than Green. When he returns, as he often does, respectable members of the community — the elder lawyer, the current circuit judge, the retired newspaper publisher — shun him. His mere presence stirs apprehension, if not fear. Rumors shadow him: Green is a drug trafficker in Florida. Green is an FBI informant. Green is a Mafia associate.

    “They’re scared to death of me in this town,” he says. “They always wonder what I’m up to. They’ll tell you I belong to the mob. They’ll tell you I work for the federal government. They don’t know.” Green is an enigma. Reviled by many and trusted by few, he trades in uncertainty as if his life depends on it.

    For more than 20 years now, Green has maintained that he has knowledge of the plot to murder the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. He testified behind closed doors before the House Select Committee on Assassinations in 1978; the testimony has been sealed by law until 2029. In 1997, he told his story to Dexter King, son of the slain civil-rights leader, in a private meeting.

    The next time Green set out to tell this story, he ended up in jail. He was on his way to meet a senior producer for CBS News in Memphis on Feb. 25, 1998, when he and his wife were pulled over in their Dodge pickup by the Shelby County (Tenn.) Sheriff’s Department narcotics unit. Green had ostensibly come under suspicion because police were investigating whether a methamphetamine lab was being run at the hotel where he had spent the night. The narcotics squad found no drugs, but Green was held in police custody for three days before he was released. Because of the arrest, Green missed a scheduled interview with Dan Rather for 48 Hours.

    The news program, which preceded the 30th anniversary of the assassination, focused renewed attention — based on theories promulgated by the late James Earl Ray’s last attorney, William F. Pepper — on a possible conspiracy to kill King. At the time, Pepper was peddling his own conspiracy theory, based on the claims of Loyd Jowers, former owner of Jim’s Grill, who said he had paid a Memphis police officer to kill King at the behest of a local mob figure. Rather dismissed Green’s involvement in one sentence, telling viewers that Green’s prison record showed him to have been in custody on the day of the assassination.

    But Green says that his prison record is wrong and that his 1998 arrest and subsequent discrediting are part of a continuing government disinformation campaign promoting the late FBI director J. Edgar Hoover’s “lone gunman” theory. Claims by Green that he possesses what may have been the murder weapon and one of the getaway vehicles make his assertions seem all the more preposterous. Prosecutors from the Memphis district attorney’s office to the U.S. Justice Department label him a convicted felon and an unreliable source.

    Yet there are untold elements that lend some credibility to Green’s far-fetched story. Despite his criminal record, Green has served as a local law-enforcement official and a federal undercover agent for years. Police officers and sheriffs have provided him with reference letters. More telling are Green’s FBI files, which provide a partial chronicle of his life over the last 35 years and corroborate many details of his account.

    “I just wanted to tell the story and disappear,” Green says. He is sitting bare-chested at a table in Room 16 at Pic’s Motel on Truman Boulevard in Caruthersville. The motel once served as a location for illicit high-stakes poker games. It no longer holds that cachet. The room smells of mildew and cigarette smoke. Outside, a rusty window-unit air conditioner sits beside the door. Other household debris litters the parking lot.

    “I’m serious. I’ve got a place in Colorado,” he says. “They’d never find me. I got several IDs I can use that I’ve had for years that they don’t know about — Social Security cards, voting cards, everything. And they’re legal; they’re not fake. I know how to do it. It’s the oldest trick in the book, how to disappear.”

    Green pauses to light a Misty 120 menthol cigarette, takes a drag and then coughs. Of his three tattoos, two are of the jailhouse variety — a dove on one arm, a hawk on the other. The third has “Jim” inscribed above a crudely etched dagger piercing a heart.

    A half-empty fifth of Gilbey’s gin sits on one corner of the table, near a bottle of prescription painkillers. Green, 54, continues fantasizing about changing his name, changing his life, starting anew. “The only thing you can’t make disappear is your fingerprints,” he says. “There’s a way, but I wouldn’t go through it. Too much work. Acid and sanding. You have to go to a doctor in South America to get it done. I ain’t going through that. I done lived too long, anyway. That’s the reason I sleep with that.” As he speaks, Green reaches into his black overnight bag and pulls out a .45-caliber semiautomatic handgun.


    Green’s tale begins in the fall of 1964, when he moved to St. Louis with his first wife and their infant son. Green worked downtown at International Shoe. When he turned 18 in January 1965, he dutifully registered for the draft, listing his home address as 2138 Victor Ave. But with his marriage in trouble, he took off for Caruthersville in March. The next month, he and a friend hit the road in a 1959 Ford Fairlane and ended up in Laredo, Texas. After crossing the border, they bought bus tickets to Mexico City. Once they reached the capital, they got a room at the Bonampak Hotel.

    According to the official FBI account, the two young men ran out of money after going on a spree, then asked the U.S. Embassy to pay their fare home. The embassy denied the request and advised them to call their parents. FBI communiqués describe the pair as “smart aleck, hostile, generally uncooperative and uncommunicative.” During an interview with an embassy official, Green’s partner — his name has been blacked out in the FBI records — reportedly displayed a switchblade knife and repeatedly flicked it open. They were considered armed and dangerous. After being spurned at the U.S. Embassy, the two decided to see whether they’d get a better reception at the Soviet Embassy, according to FBI records.

    Green remembers it differently. He claims that he met a CIA contact, a Mexican lawyer, at the border. His contact, he says, arranged for the sale of his car and directed him to meet a man at the Monterrey bus station who would provide further instructions and travel money. Once directed to the hotel in Mexico City, Green called a number at the U.S. Embassy. At an appointed hour that evening, an English-speaking cab driver took Green and his friend to a side-street café, where an embassy attaché advised them on how to present themselves when they visited the Soviet Embassy the next day.

    One aspect of the saga is undisputed. The FBI memos indicate that Green and his companion visited the Soviet Embassy on two successive days. On their second visit, they formally defected to the Soviet Union. When the pair left the embassy, they were promptly arrested by the Mexican secret police and jailed. On April 21, 1965, Mexican authorities deported the two young men.

    The case generated a flurry of secret cables. FBI field offices in St. Louis and San Antonio were alerted after urgent messages were dispatched from the U.S. Embassy in Mexico City to the FBI director’s office in Washington, D.C. The Memphis and Kansas City FBI offices would later be brought into the investigation. At headquarters, the attempted defection was discussed in internal memos among high-ranking bureau officials. The internal security, domestic-intelligence and espionage sections were all apprised of the situation. Portions of this correspondence have been redacted for national-security reasons. Two of the internal memos are completely blacked out. Ultimately, after an agent interviewed Green in September 1965, the FBI director’s office concluded that Green’s “Mexican escapade [was] obviously a youthful prank” and expressed no further interest in pursuing the case.

    By that time, Green had enlisted in the Army and was stationed at Fort Leonard Wood. In November, he got drunk with some of his Army buddies and drove in a stolen car to St. Louis, where he was arrested. He was convicted of car theft in Oregon County, Mo., and sentenced to three years in prison. At the Missouri Penitentiary in Jefferson City, Green says, he crossed paths with James Earl Ray, an inmate who worked in the laundry. Green was transferred to the Algoa Correctional Center, also in Jefferson City, and, later, to a medium-security prison in Moberly. During at least part of his incarceration, Department of Corrections records indicate that Green worked as an undercover operative for a deputy sheriff in Oregon County. But Green doesn’t recall doing that. He was released in late August 1967 and immediately resumed his criminal activities.


    At Moberly, Green served time with Moe Mahanna, a Gaslight Square club owner who was doing six years on a manslaughter rap for beating an Indiana tourist to death outside his bar, the Living Room. Being locked up with Mahanna opened doors for Green when he got out, helping him gain acceptance among a cast of St. Louis criminal figures, including East Side boss Frank “Buster” Wortman and labor racketeer Louis D. Shoulders. Just 20 years old, the Caruthersville youth had already put together a sordid résumé. He was an ex-con. He had a network of mob contacts. At 6-foot-1 and 185 pounds, Green could be at once arrogant, rebellious and physically intimidating. But his immaturity also made him pliable. St. Louis’ criminal syndicate could use a man like Green.

    Within a month of being released from prison, Green says, he and his friend Butch Collier met with Shoulders at Whiskey A-Go-Go, across the street from Mahanna’s club in Gaslight Square. The nightclub had a reputation for being a hangout of felons and other notorious characters. As early as 1958, Shoulders himself had been subpoenaed by the Senate Rackets Committee. He later took over Laborers Local 42, and, by 1967, with the Vietnam War raging, he had gained control over hundreds of jobs at the Gateway Army Ammunition plant, a project plagued by millions of dollars in cost overruns.

    When Shoulders walked into Whiskey A-Go-Go, Green recognized the man who accompanied him. The man, known by Green only as “Paul,” had been introduced to him earlier at a downtown pool hall by Collier. Green says Paul was then in his mid- to late 30s, about 5-foot-10, with a dark complexion. He wore a suit with an open-collared shirt and no tie, spoke with a Northeastern accent and had red hair. Paul, Green says, appeared to be acquainted with the management at the go-go club and seemed to be talking business with several people at the bar.

    The meeting, Green says, was not a chance encounter. It had been set up by Lee J. “Jaybird” Gatewood, Caruthersville’s crime boss. Jaybird had been contacted by Wortman, who controlled organized crime in East St. Louis, Southern Illinois and Southeast Missouri. Green says Paul agreed to pay Green and Collier $4,500 to pick up a truckload of stolen Cadillacs from a railyard in St. Louis and drive to the Town and Country Motel in New Orleans, headquarters of New Orleans Mafia don Carlos Marcello. Green says he didn’t realize who Marcello was until years later. Back then, Green was merely a driver. His entire criminal career to date involved alcohol and fast cars: running whiskey to dry counties in nearby Tennessee, Alabama and Mississippi and going on a drunken spree in the Army in a stolen vehicle.

    In contrast to his past exploits, Green’s next job seemed almost tame. Wortman’s rackets included providing “insurance protection” to vending-machine operators, including Broadway Music in Caruthersville, then owned by Harold J. “Bo” Young. A portion of the untaxed cash receipts was regularly shipped north to St. Louis. Less than two weeks after he dropped off the hot cars in New Orleans, Green says, he delivered a payment to Wortman in St. Louis and then met Paul at the downtown pool hall, where they had lunch. Paul lauded him for his work and then reached into his jacket pocket and flashed an FBI badge.

    “I thought I was going back to jail,” Green says. Paul assured him he was not under arrest, but Green left in a panic and hightailed it back to the Climax bar in Caruthersville. Green found Jaybird in his usual position, perched on top of his safe in the bar. “I said, ‘Jaybird, do you know this motherfucker is a FBI agent?’” Green recalls. Jaybird, he says, laughed and asked him whether he had shit his pants. The older crook then tried to calm him down. “Look, we do things for them. They do things for us,” Green recalls Jaybird saying. “It works the same way it does with the sheriff. All you got to do is trust what he tells you.”

    Green says he agreed to cooperate with Paul but continued to feel uneasy about it. Not only was Paul an outsider, he had identified himself as a federal agent and was becoming more involved in calling the shots. Over the next several months, Green recalls, Paul visited Caruthersville three or four times. The meetings, which were always held in the backroom of the Climax, at different times included Jaybird, Young, Collier, Green, Pemiscot County Sheriff Clyde Orton and Buddy Cook, the town’s most prominent bootlegger. At one of these meetings, Green says, Paul instructed him to pick up three rifles from a Caruthersville pawnbroker. After retrieving the weapons, he stowed them in a shed behind his parents’ house, in a duffel bag holding his Army clothes.

    Meanwhile, Green’s personal life had taken another unforeseen turn. His second marriage lasted only a week. This time, he moved south to Memphis, where he shared an apartment with Joe R. Tipton Jr., a Caruthersville friend. In late December 1967, Green got drunk on his way back from St. Louis and picked up a hitchhiker, Edward Fatzsinger. Once they reached the Bootheel, they stopped at the Idle Hour tavern in Hayti, where Green’s estranged wife tended bar. After leaving in a fit of anger, Green spied a 1966 Chevy Caprice in the parking lot and decided to steal it. It wasn’t a strictly impulsive decision. He knew of a Memphis stock-car driver who might buy the car for its 350-cubic-inch engine. Two days later, Memphis police knocked on his door and arrested him for interstate transportation of a stolen vehicle, a federal charge.

    Under questioning by the FBI, Green offered to give up the names of other criminals, including corrupt law-enforcement officials, if the feds dropped charges. But the agents refused, and Green remained in the Shelby County, Tenn., jail until Feb. 15, 1968, when he was transferred to the Springfield, Mo., medical facility for federal prisoners because he was spitting up blood. Green contends he faked the symptoms by sucking on his gums. After being held for observation for a little over a month, Green says, he was sent back to Memphis.

    On his first night back in jail, Green says, the chief jailer escorted him across the street to the federal building to confer with Paul, who informed him that he would be released immediately. Before leaving, Paul warned him not to make any further statements to the police.

    It is impossible to verify Green’s version of events through federal-court records, because they were routinely expunged more than a decade ago. Contacted by telephone, a spokesman for the federal hospital says the limited information available shows Green stayed at the Springfield facility until April 9, 1968, five days after King was murdered. Not surprisingly, Green disputes the official record.

    By his account, he had returned to Caruthersville by the third week of March and was working for his father at a lumberyard. He began courting his third wife and took her to the Caruthersville High prom. He also attended another meeting in the backroom of the Climax bar. The assemblage included Paul, Jaybird, Young, Orton, Collier and Green. Paul passed around a photograph of James Earl Ray, saying Ray had threatened to snitch on everybody and had to be silenced. Paul ordered Green and Collier to rendezvous with him in Memphis on April 2.


    On the afternoon of April 2, 1968, Butch Collier and Jim Green checked into a motel in Southhaven, Miss. That evening, they patronized a nearby massage parlor and then went out drinking. Paul showed up at their room late the next night and dropped a package on the bed containing $5,000. He promised an equal amount once the hit was carried out. Paul told them Ray planned to rob a tavern on South Main Street. Two Memphis police officers had been contracted to kill him as he attempted to make his getaway. If the police missed, Green, who was to be stationed on a nearby rooftop, would shoot Ray instead.

    That evening, Collier and Green drove back to Caruthersville to retrieve the weapons. When they returned to Memphis, they took a room at a motel on Lamar Avenue, near the airport. The next night, Paul showed up and explained the plan in detail. Three identical vehicles would be involved in the plot. Ray’s white Ford Mustang and another owned by Tipton, Green’s roommate, would be parked near a rooming house, Bessie’s, where Ray had taken a room. A third white Mustang would be parked down the street, near the Arcade restaurant. In case of a mixup, the third automobile would be used as the getaway car. It would be equipped with a CB radio to monitor police calls, and false identification papers would be stowed in the glovebox. Green would be positioned on the roof of a cotton warehouse south of Jim’s Grill, on the opposite side of the street.

    After the briefing, Paul, Green and Collier drove to South Main to familiarize themselves with the area. It was cloudy, with a light mist falling, and doubts were beginning to creep into Green’s mind. “I really didn’t know if I could do it,” he says. “So I kept asking Butch what was he supposed to be doing, and he said, ‘All I know is, I’m going with Paul.’ The pair went back to their motel room and talked. As thunder and lightning flashed outside, Collier went off on a long, rambling screed about his segregationist views. The conversation struck Green as odd, given the circumstances, but he tacitly agreed with his friend’s racist rant, not knowing its portent. Green had no idea King had preached his last sermon at the Mason Temple that night. He says he didn’t even know King had returned to Memphis. Moreover, he didn’t care. “King didn’t mean no more to me than anybody else. Back then, a nigger was a nigger,” Green says. “You either talked that way or your own white people would run you out of town. You might not agree with it, but you still had to act like you were prejudiced. And I guess, at that time, I was, to a certain extent.”

    The next day, about noon, Collier and Green drove downtown to the King Cotton Hotel. Butch dressed, as usual, in a navy-blue peacoat and plaid shirt. As they were seated at a back table of a restaurant on the ground floor, Ray walked in, sat down at the counter and glanced in their direction before exiting. According to Ray’s own account, he noted two suspicious characters staring at him when he mistakenly wandered into Jim’s Belmont Café at 260 S. Main St. later that afternoon.

    About 3 p.m., Collier dropped Green off near the rear of the warehouse. After crossing the railroad tracks, Green scaled a ladder and positioned himself on the roof. From his vantage point, he had a clear view of Jim’s Grill and Bessie’s rooming house. Fifteen minutes later, he saw Collier and Paul pull up in Tipton’s Mustang and park a couple of spaces behind Ray’s identical vehicle. They got out and entered different doorways. At the same time, to the south, he saw the third Mustang draw to the curb in front of the Arcade. The driver was picked up by another well-dressed man in a dark Chevrolet sedan. Ray then exited the rooming house and entered Jim’s Grill, followed by Paul. At 3:30 p.m., Ray left and walked north on Main Street. A few minutes later, Paul came out, looked in Green’s direction and then re-entered the rooming house. Ray returned.

    Green remembers the sounds that day: the pigeons cooing and flapping their wings on the roof, the sound of the traffic below, river tows blowing their horns behind him. It was the slack time of year for the cotton industry, but at 4 p.m. some employees milled below him. Fearing he would be seen, Green moved to a more secluded rooftop, four doors south.

    “I laid on that fucking building almost two-and-half hours,” Green says. “I heard every bird. I heard every noise. I seen everything I could see. I thought every thought I could think. And the question has always been ‘Would I have done it?’ I don’t know.”

    As dusk approached, Green grew edgier. Then, at 5:55 p.m., he saw Ray step from the rooming house and jump into the Mustang. Something had gone amiss. Ray hadn’t robbed the grill. No cops had arrived. Green hesitated. Paul had told Green that Ray would head south on foot. Instead, Ray drove north. Green waited, thinking Ray might circle the block. Five minutes passed, and he thought he heard a backfire. Within moments, Collier appeared at the front of the building across the street, followed by Paul, who dropped a bundle in a nearby doorway. Green heard screams and saw people running from the nearby fire station. Collier and Paul got into Tipton’s Mustang, drove north and then made a U-turn. Collier dropped Paul off at the third Mustang, parked next to the Arcade, and then swung behind the warehouse to pick up Green. By this time, Green could hear sirens, and police were starting to arrive.

    With Green riding shotgun, Collier cut over Third Street to Lamar Avenue and headed west. After crossing the Mississippi River, he pulled under the Memphis-Arkansas Bridge and tossed two rifles into the river. The pair headed north on Highway 61. Collier had driven all the way to Osceola, Ark., a distance of about 45 miles, before Green noticed the third rifle, still in the backseat. They decided it was too late to ditch the gun. They would have to wait. The remainder of the trip, Green says, they didn’t talk much, but Collier kept repeating the same phrase to himself: “I killed that nigger, I killed that nigger.” After Collier dropped him off at his parents’ house, Green says, he left the rifle with a friend who lived in the neighborhood. By the time he got home, his father was watching the news. Green went into the kitchen, poured a glass of milk, grabbed a handful of cookies, came back to the living room and sat down. On the screen was the image of the rooming house on South Main in Memphis. The TV news reported that a sniper had fired a shot from a rear window of the building, fatally wounding King as he stood on the balcony of the Lorraine Motel. Green says he almost fell out of his chair. It was the first inkling that his Memphis trip had been tied to something more than knocking off a two-bit hood.

    Green borrowed his father’s car and sped to the Climax bar. On his arrival, Jaybird ushered him into the backroom. Green recalls Jaybird telling him that he had “fucked up by not killing Ray, and everybody [was] covering their tracks.” Green says Jaybird instructed him, if asked, to say he had been gambling all day at the Climax. Jaybird told Green to go home and lie low. Two days later, on April 6, Jaybird called Green to a meeting in the backroom. All the major players attended: Paul, Wortman, Shoulders, Young, Orton and Collier. All the persons named by Green, with the possible exception of Paul, are dead. Paul remains unidentified. This leaves no one to corroborate Green’s account of the meeting, which Green could not have attended if he was incarcerated in the prison hospital as his record indicates.

    During the alleged meeting, Green recalls, Paul referred indirectly to his superior. Paul said that his boss would go to any length necessary to shield himself from being implicated, Green says. Because Paul had earlier shown him FBI credentials, Green inferred that someone higher up in the bureau was involved. The contract on Ray remained in effect. Green and Collier were each issued a .38-caliber Brazilian-made Rossi pistol and told to stand by.


    Green’s account — a subplot within a larger conspiracy that has Ray set up as King’s assassin but then murdered by police or by Green — is incredible by any measure, so fantastic that the U.S. Justice Department has chosen to disregard it altogether. When the department issued its latest findings, last June, it didn’t even refer to Green. The department undertook the investigation to look into recent allegations regarding the assassination, including Jowers’ claims, after being asked by the King family. Essentially, the government has deemed Green an unreliable witness, if not a liar and a fraud. Barry Kowalski, the Justice Department lawyer who headed the investigation, refuses to comment publicly on Green’s allegations. An investigation conducted by the Shelby County District Attorney in 1998 also gave no credence to Green’s story.

    The version of events Green told the Riverfront Times has discrepancies as well. The inconsistencies relate mainly to locations and place names, errors that could be explained as lapses of memory on Green’s part. Less explicable are Green’s two mystery men: Collier and Paul. Collier appears to have used more than one name and is likely dead. His participation in the conspiracy cannot be confirmed, except through Green. As for Paul, there is no readily available way to verify whether he ever existed.

    Green’s only true believer is Lyndon Barsten, a Minneapolis-based conspiracy researcher. The two have teamed up and hit the conference and lecture circuit together. Barsten spends all his spare time delving into the King case. He considers it his search for the Holy Grail. To his credit, Barsten is responsible for obtaining Green’s FBI records through the Freedom of Information Act. “What Jim is saying makes perfect sense to me,” Barsten says. “There is documentation to back up what he has to say.”

    Barsten notes that the bureau’s records show that Eugene Medori, an FBI agent in Memphis, displayed a photo lineup to Ralph Carpenter, a clerk at the York Arms Co., on April 6. Ray had bought binoculars from Carpenter on the afternoon of April 4. At this time, the FBI had yet to identify Ray as a suspect. One of the mug shots was of Byron De La Beckwith, a white supremacist and a suspect in the 1963 murder of civil-rights leader Medgar Evers. (More than 30 years later, De La Beckwith would be convicted of the murder.) The agent also showed Carpenter a photograph of Green.

    “Now, why was I in a lineup with De La Beckwith?” asks Green. “I ain’t no killer. All of them boys are Klansmen. I’m just a car thief. What am I doing there? I’m in the lineup of the FBI, two days after King’s killing. What am I doing in that lineup — if I’m in jail?”

    Medori’s name also shows up on the witness list of Fatzsinger, Green’s co-defendant in the car-theft case. Solely on the basis of his Springfield medical record, Green is presumed to have been held without bail from his arrest in December 1967 until his sentencing on July 12, 1968.

    On May 15, however, the Memphis FBI office dispatched an urgent cable to its counterpart in St. Louis, requesting that James Cooper Green of Caruthersville be interviewed. The message refers to an earlier communication dated May 1, 1968, which identified Green as the inmate who may have been beaten for not paying for amphetamines purchased from Ray while the two were behind bars in Jeff City. The cable mentions that Green was “currently on bond following indictment … [in] Memphis.” Nevertheless, the date on the cable still does not contradict the Springfield record that shows Green to have been there until April 9.

    Other memos in the MURKIN file (“MURKIN” is the bureau’s code name for the King case) show the FBI focusing attention on Caruthersville and the Bootheel — after the bureau had identified Ray as the prime suspect on April 19.

    From May 15-20, 1968, for example, the St. Louis field office, in cooperation with local law-enforcement officials, canvassed individuals and businesses in the Bootheel that received phone calls placed from a Sinclair service station in Portageville, calls believed at the time to have a connection to the case. The FBI office in Chicago also searched for J.D. Dailey, a presumed associate of Ray’s who had recently moved from St. Louis to Portageville, Mo.

    “Why is the town of Caruthersville mentioned in all these documents?” asks Green. “Not just one FBI office, but four or five.”

    Caruthersville crops up in the MURKIN file again, more than a year after the assassination. By this time, Ray had pleaded guilty, then quickly recanted. Despite Ray’s renewed plea of innocence, his biographer, William Bradford Huie, cast him as the lone assassin in a 1968 Look magazine series. In the last article, Huie wrote that Ray stayed at a motel near Corinth, Miss., on April 2, 1968. This prompted FBI headquarters to order its field offices in Birmingham, Jackson and Memphis to investigate Ray’s whereabouts between March 29 and April 3. Motel registrations were scrutinized to determine whether anyone had accompanied or contacted Ray during this period. Headquarters advised the field offices not to divulge that their inquiries were related to Ray’s case. But after the Jackson FBI disseminated the motel-registration names to other branches across the country, headquarters did an about-face and halted the investigation:

    “In view of the fact that more than a year has passed since these persons stayed over night at Corinth, and since similar investigation of this type in this case has previously been unproductive, and since Huie has admitted that Ray frequently is untruthful in statements to him, and further since it is not believed that it is of any particular importance to establish whether or not James Earl Ray stayed over night at Corinth on 4/2/68, all offices will disregard the leads set out in Jackson airtel dated 5/7/69 unless specifically advised by the Bureau to cover same.”

    T

  • Show Me the Money

    Listen. Can you hear? Ellen Reasonover is sobbing today. Today, almost 20 months removed from the Chillicothe Correctional Center, almost 20 months removed from 16-and-a-half years in hell. Steven Goldman, are you listening? Dan Chapman, you? Ellen, she wants to know. Even as she attempts a valiant smile through those tears. Almost seems God never meant for her to cry. Gave her that smooth little-girl voice that can slither its way around a conversation so pleasantly and then, unobtrusively, slink right back out. Seems that voice was preordained to pull funnies, not explain tears in a tone so strained and worn.

    But it has. Explained so many tears. And so many times over. Tears of uncertainty.

    Of fear. Of anger. Of anguish. Of coping. Of remembrance.

    And now, today, almost 20 months removed from an existence where days and months collapsed into half-a-life’s languish too chilling to recall and too real to forget, those tears, those initial tears of uncertainty and fear, have come back to haunt her. Yes, she’s sprung now, but … now what? Now what? Today, 20 months removed, Ellen honestly doesn’t know.

    “Sometimes I wish they’d never let me out,” she says today. And again: “Sometimes I wish they’d never let me out.”


    Ellen doesn’t remember, though Steve Toney has told her plenty of times, but she and Steve — she then a convicted killer, Steve then a convicted rapist — rode the same bus during a 1983 journey from the St. Louis County Courts in Clayton to their respective state penitentiaries — Ellen to Renz Correctional Center in Cedar City, Steve to Jefferson City Correctional Center. All Ellen remembers from those daylong trips was being crammed in a hot bus with a bunch of sweaty men. Steve doesn’t remember much, either, but he does remember Ellen; he had been reading about her in the newspapers during his own court proceedings for rape and sodomy and recognized the young face that looked so out of place on that busload of crime-stained stories.

    Missouri has had at least two known cases of wrongful imprisonment in which the innocent were incarcerated for more than five years. Back in 1983, both victims were on that same bus, headed for prison, Steve says. Ellen would go on to serve more than 16 years of a life sentence after her conviction for the murder of a Dellwood gas-station attendant. Ellen’s conviction hinged on allegations that Goldman, then the prosecutor, now a circuit judge, failed to let the jury know about two secretly taped conversations in which Ellen denied killing the man and that Chapman, then a Dellwood policeman and now the police chief, dangled dollars for testimony against Ellen [Melinda Roth, “Burned,” RFT, June 30, 1999]. A federal-court ruling triggered her release on Aug. 3, 1999. As for Steve, he had to wait out almost 13 years on a rape conviction before DNA evidence disconnected him from the crime in July 1996.

    Now, five years later, Steve, like Ellen, has been busy just trying to get his life together. Steve would be the first to say he wasn’t a saint coming up. He had already served two-and-a-half years at Moberly — forgery, robbery, kidnapping — before the 1982 rape and sodomy of a 21-year-old Richmond Heights woman was pinned on him. Steve had been picked up on a bad-check case and, instead, found himself identified by the woman as her rapist. His alibi? He was asleep at his grandmother’s home. No chance. Next thing he knew, he’d been sentenced to two consecutive life sentences, with no parole until 2013. Then, 13 years later, a DNA test gave him back his life, and he was permitted back into society … no support … expected to get his life together. It was like abolishing slavery without reparations. Or keeping a fish out of the water too long before tossing it back.

    It hasn’t been easy for Steve. No, not by a long shot. Not as easy as it was for him back in the day on those basketball courts in Richmond Heights. That was easy. He’d take that ball in his hand, and he could swear by his mother that he didn’t have the thing on a string. Nobody’d believe him. Need a 45-degree bounce pass, on the run, down three quarters of the length of the court? No problem, one-handed or two? Need a now-you-see-it-now-you-don’t crossover and a pull-up 20-footer? It was money for Steve. He’d play pickup games with the likes of McKinley grad and future Celtics All-Star Jo Jo White. Shoot around with the St. Louis Hawks. He didn’t have the height, but his arms were unnaturally long. He was a point guard who would also be his team’s second-best rebounder. Steve would drop 20 a night for Brentwood High, no sweat, and smoke a cigarette after the game. It was that easy.

    But this, this is different. What’s easy about being five-and-a-half months behind on rent? About being behind on utilities? About using what little money you have in your pocket on public transportation? About being 54 and looking for that permanent job (Steve works 24 hours a week driving cars at a rental agency)? About depending on other people for survival — 20 dollars here, an extra 30 there?

    Ellen faces similar challenges. Her clothes don’t fit these days; they’re all too big. “I don’t care,” she says. “I don’t ever have any money to eat nothing.” She had an assembly-line job and an apartment, but then she was laid off. She lost the apartment. Rent was just too much. She has $35 in her legal-defense fund. She wants to take 20 out so she can fill up her gas tank. Maybe borrow 10 from her mother. Another 20 from her sister. Just something to get some food, maybe. She received a letter from New York City a few weeks ago. Enclosed was a contract to purchase her life story — movie rights, book rights, series rights, that sort of thing. More important, it held the potential for money. But Ellen hasn’t had time to really even read it, and, of course, she doesn’t have the money to take it to a lawyer. “I’ve been so stressed. I just, I don’t know …” her voice trails off. Ellen had been living with her daughter, Charmelle Bufford, when she had her own place. Now Charmelle stays with Ellen’s mother.

    And Ellen? Where does she stay? Sometimes at her mother’s. At her sister’s. At one of her girlfriend’s. But she doesn’t want to be a burden. She never wanted to be a burden. Sometimes she sleeps in her car.

    “It’s a very difficult road, especially when you’ve been in prison for a lot of years,” says James McCloskey, whose New Jersey-based Centurion Ministries helped free both Ellen and Steve.

    “It usually takes a good year, maybe two years, for them to find their place and get their feet on the ground and understand their environment and the world around them,” McCloskey says. “First of all, they have got to develop some sort of financial footing so they can ultimately lead self-reliant, independent and productive lives. Now, that requires employment, gainful employment that has some kind of upward mobility to it. That usually is hit-and-miss, and it takes a few tries to latch onto the right position. And there’s always psychological counseling that you should go through, because there’s a lot of anger in people, whether they admit it or not. A lot of them try to hide the anger and repress it because they believe, and I think rightfully so, that if they show their anger, then the people will start to believe, well, maybe the person did what he or she was in prison for.”

    Anger. Steve won’t show it; he never has been one to dwell on his misfortune. He doesn’t dwell on the friends he lost while in prison; he doesn’t dwell on the family he lost while in prison. How many times will people ask him whether he’s bitter? And how many times has he told them he’s not? Do they want him to be bitter? Well, he is, deep down. “Bitter? Yeah. Angry? Yeah. Mad? Yeah — as hell. See, I always believe. I’ve given out a long time ago. I just don’t have no more. I can go only so far, do so much; I can only pray and keep believing. I’ve given out a long time ago, but I just don’t give up. You, yourself, can only take so much. The strength comes from not giving up. With every difficulty comes relief.” So, bitter, yes, but usually he won’t say it.

    He’s a praying man, but he’s a proud man, says friend June Jeffries; he won’t admit the hurt. He’ll hide the scar. Look at him. Look at the way he walks — he’s always had that strutting gait. She remembers when he used to take her roller skating or to those block dances in Richmond Heights, where they would block the whole street off and just dance to Smokey Robinson, to the Supremes, to Sam Cooke, to Marvin Gaye. He had told her cousin way back then that June would be his friend one day … he’s a proud man. And this proud man will keep his emotions in check; instead of venting, he’ll pick up his copy of the Quran from his bedside stand and read “The Expansion.” The last two lines of the verse? So, verily, with every difficulty there is relief/Verily, with every difficulty there is relief.


    Like 35 other states, Missouri has no mechanism to compensate the wrongfully convicted. State Rep. Betty Thompson (D-University City), though, has sponsored a House bill that would do just that. Indemnification statutes are a legislative phenomenon so scarce that even some attorneys are oblivious. “Wow,” says Dan Gralike, deputy director of the Missouri Public Defender Commission, when briefed about the bill. “Is that some kind of award?” Closely tailored to resemble a New Jersey statute, the bill, which hasn’t made it to the House floor yet, proposes a cap of $20,000 or twice the victim’s preconviction salary for each year of wrongful imprisonment — a higher compensation cap than most, which swing from the federal limit of just $5,000, regardless of duration of incarceration, to New York’s unlimited-damages policy.

    Claimants must shift gears from the criminal to the civil arena in order to qualify under Thompson’s bill — that is, after proving reasonable doubt of guilt to earn emancipation, they must show “clear and convincing” evidence of innocence to qualify for any damage awards. The task would prove smoother for someone like Steve, who was unequivocally exonerated by DNA evidence, and thornier for Ellen, who won her freedom through the dramatic introduction of exculpatory evidence that cast doubt on her murder conviction. Because her bill was originally drafted with Ellen in mind, says Thompson, she may push to include Ellen’s name specifically in the bill’s final version to ensure her an award.

    On their release, both Steve and Ellen had the option of filing for civil damages, but, attorneys concede, the prospects for success are limited — the very reason Thompson’s bill is so crucial. The immunities provided to police, prosecutors and judges and a fault-premised civil-law structure team to make damage awards excruciatingly rare at best. “A lot of these people who that this has happened to, it isn’t any one person’s fault,” explains Adele Bernhard, associate law professor at Pace University in White Plains, N.Y., who tracks compensation legislation across the nation. “If somebody got raped and they all of a sudden saw you walking down the street, and they said, ‘Oh my God, that’s the person who did it,’ and if they were a credible person, and they tell that to the police, the police have a responsibility to arrest you.

    “And if the jury convicted you based on that person’s identification, there would be nothing wrong with the verdict; it just so happens that you didn’t do it. So, 18 years later, when they do the DNA test and they prove it wasn’t you and you were right all along, yes, the victim was wrong, but she just made a mistake. So, generally, unless the police have torn up police reports or hidden witnesses or suggested that people lied or tortured confessions out of people, then nobody’s done anything wrong. They’ve all gone along with the prosecution the way they normally would; it just happens to be the wrong person.”

    Indeed, Steve, a victim of mistaken identity, failed in his attempt to collect civil damages soon after his release. Ellen plans to announce her own civil suit, which she says will be filed later this month by New York attorney Barry Scheck. Scheck couldn’t be reached for comment.

    There have been some spots of civil success. An Illinois foursome known as the Ford Heights Four who spent a combined 65 years in prison collected a cool $36 million from Cook County two springs ago in a wrongful-prosecution lawsuit. Ellen and Steve, who knows what they’ll get, if anything? Thompson’s bill, Steve’s only realistic shot, isn’t exactly gaining legislative momentum, and Ellen, she can only wait and see what unfolds in the coming months. And until then? That’s the question.

    “I just wish I had money,” Ellen says, drying her eyes, “from the movie deal, from the lawsuit, from the bill, from something. Then maybe, maybe I’d get me an apartment. I just want enough to pay rent, electric, gas, phone bill, get enough to eat. That’s all.”

  • Pope John Paul II Came to St. Louis 20 Years Ago Saturday and Gave Us a Gift

    Pope John Paul II Came to St. Louis 20 Years Ago Saturday and Gave Us a Gift


    SARAH FENSKE

    So, this happened.

    Twenty years ago this Saturday, my husband gave Pope John Paul II a hockey stick. As any longtime St. Louisan could tell you, this isn’t quite as random as it sounds; it’s twenty years ago Saturday that the man born Karol Wojtyla came, improbably, to St. Louis.

    He was here just 31 hours, but the pope packed that day and a half full. He met President Bill Clinton at the airport, blessed patients from Cardinal Glennon, convinced Governor Mel Carnahan to spare a death-row inmate, presided over the largest mass ever held in the United States at Trans World Dome (now the Dome at America’s Center) and met Stan Musial and Rosa Parks. Oh, and he held a youth rally at Kiel Center (now Enterprise Center), speaking to 21,000 Catholic kids from all over the metro area.

    That’s when a quiet kid from DeSmet Jesuit High School got to give him a gift. My husband doesn’t play hockey; in fact, he’s never played hockey. The gift was less about affinity for the sport than the fact that the youth rally was in Kiel Center, and hockey is what generally happens there. But it still makes for a great photo.

    It’s one of the first things I noticed when I first visited my in-laws’ home in south county; there’s John, kneeling in front of the great pontiff, hockey stick in hand. Perhaps it’s one reason I knew I’d met a good one — someone had vetted this guy as a youngster and determined he wasn’t the type to knock the holy father upside the head. (Although really, John says, if anyone gave him a security check, he wasn’t aware of it. Back in the ’90s, no one thought high school boys were dangerous.) When the pope exited the stage, he apparently took his cane and made a gesture like he was shooting a hockey puck. No word on what had happened to the ceremonial stick.

    Today, when St. Louis has a population that’s smaller than Fresno and our decline is a perpetual topic of conversation, it’s almost impossible to imagine a pope visiting us. Maybe it felt like that then, too. By 1999, John Paul had already made trips to the U.S. to visit Boston, New York, Philadelphia, Chicago, and Washington, D.C., among many other U.S. cities across three previous trips. But that year, we became the center of the Catholic universe — and, in some ways, the world. President Clinton had to come here because this time the aging pontiff was making just one American stop. He came to visit us.

    In reality, John Paul’s visit was motivated in no small part by his esteem for St. Louis’ archbishop at the time, Justin Rigali, who had previously spent decades in Rome, working in elite positions for three popes. John Paul personally ordained Rigali as a bishop and would ultimately make him a cardinal. Upon arriving at Lambert Airport, he remarked that Rigali had “been close to me since I became Pope twenty years ago.”

    But even if the papal visit was as much to pay tribute to an old friend as to honor the city, it made no difference to the throngs of faithful who, if only for a day, could breath the same air as their spiritual father. It must have felt like a miracle, like being chosen by God. Mayor Clarence Harmon declared it “the most important two-day period in St. Louis history.”

    Even the RFT couldn’t get too snarky. Of the pope’s homily at the Dome, DJ Wilson and Wm. Stage wrote, “Wednesday was probably the first time the dome was filled and nobody booed.”

    My husband has never bragged about being on stage with the pope; if anything, he tends to duck and change the subject. It’s partly just how he is, but I suspect that it’s also that he felt uneasy being up there in front of 21,000 people. Who wouldn’t thrill to meeting one of the most influential leaders of the 20th century? And who wouldn’t have been paralyzingly nervous to do it as a high school student in front of thousands of other high school students?

    In fact, it wasn’t until I was talking to him the other night about this anniversary (and trying in vain, I’ll have you know, to get him to write this essay instead of me) that I learned the full story of what happened there on stage at the Kiel Center. It wasn’t just that John gave something to the pope; the pope gave something to John.

    And when, on a frigid night last November, when my water broke all over our nice hardwood floor and I screamed, “John! We have to get to the hospital now,” it turns out John was thinking about that moment with John Paul II. He may have forgotten his own cell phone — yes, dear reader, that happened — but he had the presence of mind to bring the rosary that the pope had given him that day twenty years ago in front of all those screaming fans.

    Vivienne was born that night not much more than an hour later. But even though the doctor didn’t quite make it to the delivery room in time, we did, rosary secretly tucked into my husband’s pocket.

    Today we have a very healthy, very happy two-month-old baby girl. It feels like a miracle. And for that, this daughter of a Lutheran preacher would like to thank the former pope.

    Sarah Fenske is the editor in chief of the Riverfront Times. Follow her on Twitter @sarahfenske or reach her by email at [email protected]

  • Playing Dr.

    Starting with a modest four members in 1995 and ballooning to an 11-piece at its most extravagant, Dr. Zhivegas currently consists of nine members:

    Frankie Muriel, lead singer and co-owner of Z (nightclub/restaurant on Locust Street): Some may know Muriel from his days fronting hair-metal band KINGOFTHEHILL, which made a stab at the big time with a major-label CD in 1991, right before Nirvana killed hair metal. Needless to say, the CD didn’t fly. His solo debut is in the final-mix stage, and he’s shopping it to the big labels. Muriel looks like a lead singer and acts like one, too. During the encore of a show at the Springfield, Mo., club Remington’s, a dozen ladies ended up dancing onstage. Just as the show was concluding, Muriel motioned to the perfectly named Joe Sturdy, Zhivegas roadie: “I thought he was telling me to get the people offstage,” says Sturdy. “But he was telling me to have the Cadillac waiting by the back door because he wanted to get back to the hotel directly from the stage. He never wants to hang around after the show.”

    Paul Chickey, drummer and co-owner of Z: Chickey, who serves as the band’s booker/de facto manager, is one of the four founding members of Dr. Zhivegas, which began as an offshoot of the alt-rock group Nerve. They started Zhivegas “as a lark,” he says. Chickey acknowledges the contempt with which the band is sometimes treated: “We call ourselves Whitey Cheeser,” he says. “We kind of wallow in it now. I don’t take it personal, because I know where I come from, and I know what I like, and I know what I want to play, and I feel good about myself. And I don’t feel like I have to prove myself to anybody. I came from a completely different background than Frank, more of a do-it-yourself, originals-right-off-the-bat punk-rock scene. Whatever it was that we [Nerve] wrote, whether it was shit or it was good, we were doing it ourselves, and we were convinced that we should pat ourselves on the back because of it.”

    Cubby Smith, bassist and road manager: According to nearly everyone in Zhivegas, Smith is the unsung hero, the hardest worker, the nicest guy. “Without Cub, there would be no Zhivegas,” they say. On days that Zhivegas is playing outside of town, it’s Smith who loads the gear, drives, unloads, deals with union guys, does all the bullshit work. In addition, up onstage, Smith simultaneously lays down fat bass lines and runs some of the lights with his foot. “To see people’s response when you go out and play a cover song,” he says, “man, I’ve seen people throw stuff, stand there all night and flip you off, spit at you, and you’re, like, ‘Why?’ It can be a big drag; it’ll definitely give you an edge.”

    Dee Dee James (a.k.a. Muggs), guitarist: James occasionally performs naked or debriefed in chaps. A former touring member of Color Me Badd, James is very cool and an amazing guitar player. He started his music career playing in cover bands in his teens; one of his early bands, Vision, actually gigged at drummer Chickey’s Chaminade prom in the mid-’80s. From there. he ended up as the touring guitarist for Color Me Badd. “I played with them for two years — they had that Sex You Up album.” He also spent, “like, three years” playing with Paula Abdul and hooked up with Bootsy Collins during his Color Me Badd stint. “One thing led to another,” says James, “and a lot of it [came] from me doing a lot with Bootsy. That’s how I ended up going to LA — moved out there and started working with [Ice] Cube and Snoop. I did a lot of guitars on those rap records out there — Dr. Dre, Friday soundtracks — all through Bootsy. They were calling him, ‘Hey, man, who’s that dude you got?’ That’s how I was able to make a living out there [in LA], and I lived there for six years. I did all these sessions.”

    Alonzo Lee, keyboardist: Lee is the former keyboardist for Reggae at Will. His production company, Classic Black, pumps out rap and R&B tracks and is starting to get national exposure by landing songs on major national releases, including forthcoming songs on albums by Young Dre and Krayzie Bone and Shane, plus incidental music on MTV Undressed. “I’m no crusader for cover bands,” Lee admits. “I’m all about originals. I know that’s the way to go to have any serious longevity, so I have respect for that. But in terms of what people like, and what’s working, if you look at numbers, basically people like cover bands. They like stuff you can dance to. It works, so I’m all for it. The whole point is to pack a room and get people out and checking you out. And if you do that, and you switch to originals, that’s even more of the ultimate goal. So I see it as a tool to do what you want to do. Also, with this caliber of musicianship, we go into a lot of jams, so we don’t exactly do it the same. So it’s not the true cover band — there’s a lot of flex in there.”

    Kasimu, trumpet player: A jazz-head and hip-hop producer, Kasimu is the navigator of the prison van, taking a turn behind the wheel when fellow horn player Lew Winer doesn’t feel like driving. Kasimu dresses sharp in vintage clothes — light-green mohair sweaters, old Dan-Jac winter coats. “I always had other jobs, like stocking groceries, renting cars,” he says. “I never made a conscious decision, like, ‘I want to be a musician.’ I’m just a musician. After I graduated from high school, I was going to go to cooking school, I was going to go to engineering school. And one night after work I came down, had my work clothes on, and I sat in, and that was it.” When he joined Dr. Zhivegas, Kasimu was stunned, especially given his jazz background, by the crowds the band draws: “I was, like, ‘Wow, man. There’s all these … ladies! I got fans!’ I mean, doing the jazz thing, you play all these little lounges to these older folks, people my parents’ age.”

    Lew Winer, saxophonist: At various times, Winer has played with Oliver Sain, Fresh City, Sky Bop Fly and Soul Reunion. “I actually get into the show stuff,” he says. “I don’t mind fooling around, being foolish. It used to be uncool to do all that. When you’re in other bands, jazz bands, you’re trying to be a purist. And that’s cool: I’m playing, and people are listening. But in this scene, people aren’t really listening that well, and mostly they’re just looking at a bunch of lights and noise, and it’s a different kind of stimulus that they react to.”

    Denise Atty, background vocalist (soprano): Denise is a born singer. “It’s all I do,” she says. “If I couldn’t sing, I wouldn’t be able to survive.” She’s also the matriarch of her family gospel group, A&B for Christ. Despite her love of singing, Atty occasionally hesitates when called on to perform her signature solo number, “I’m Every Woman.” “We crack up,” Muriel laughs. “She says, ‘I don’t want to do it tonight.’ She lobbied to not play it last night — she’s telling me that she’s not going to be able to do it, it doesn’t come out. And I’m, like, ‘Whatever. Even on half of a vocal cord, you could outsing anyone I’ve ever heard.’ She always tries to get out of doing it, and I’m, like, ‘Nope, put it in there anyway.’ And she wails.”

    Erminie Cannon, background vocalist (alto): More unassuming in her demeanor and presentation than Atty, Cannon has a sturdy voice, especially during “We Are Family.” She lights up when the two singers are dancing and, like Atty, seems to love being up onstage. During “Bad Girls,” Cannon sparkles when she’s singing the backing “beep-beep, yeah, beep-beep” parts. Asked whether she ever gets sick of being in Zhivegas, sick of singing the same songs, she expresses a kind of bafflement. “No,” she says. “I just love it.” She’s played in cover bands for most of her adult life: “Some of it was the same, but we didn’t do disco. We did new stuff every week, so whatever was hot at that time, that was what we played.” She also sings in alt-rock band Stir’s annual homage to Pink Floyd.

  • They’ve Got the Wrong Martyr

    Call me jaded, but the victimization of Antonio Richardson just isn’t working for me.

    Richardson is scheduled to be executed next Wednesday for his role in the horrific murder of Julie Kerry, who was raped and thrown off the old Chain of Rocks Bridge to her drowning death — along with her sister Robin — by Richardson and three other men in 1991. He was convicted in 1993 and lost all his appeals through last May, when the U.S. Supreme Court declined to take his case.

    Richardson is now 26, but his apparent claim to fame is that he was just 16 when he took part in the rape-murders. This, it turns out, has entitled him to international attention as a prospective “victim” of capital punishment.

    This week, Richardson’s lawyers are asking Gov. Bob Holden to commute his sentence to life without probation or parole, arguing that it’s barbaric to execute one so young. Joining the case are a host of idealistic advocates, from the Children’s Defense Fund to the American Society for Adolescent Psychiatry to the European Union.

    Previously, Amnesty International has carried the banner for victim Richardson. A group called the Missourians to Abolish the Death Penalty is actively in the fray, emphasizing not only Richardson’s erstwhile youth but the fact, argued by his public defender in court, that he was a former Special School District student with a borderline-retarded IQ of 70.

    In a perfect world, I suppose, all this goodwill and all these mitigating circumstances might result in a commutation for Richardson. Hell, given all the warm fuzzies being hurled, it’s surprising that they’re not demanding his full freedom.

    After all, if Richardson was such a helpless child at 16 — his attorney claims he was mentally the equivalent of a 7-year-old — and if he truly can’t be held responsible for his actions, then why should the state of Missouri imprison the poor soul, without chance for probation or parole, for the rest of his precious days? Perhaps he should just go free.

    That would be the case in a perfect world, wouldn’t it?

    Sadly for Richardson, he doesn’t live in a perfect world. He lives in the same imperfect one that Julie and Robin Kerry lived in on April 5, 1991, when they took their visiting cousin to the Chain of Rocks Bridge to show him a poem they had painted there two years ago. Julie was 20, Robin 19.

    For that crime, the two girls were raped — at Richardson’s suggestion, court records say — and pushed off the 70-foot-high bridge to their deaths. Their cousin, Thomas Cummins, was also forced to jump, but he survived and identified Richardson in court as the one who pushed the girls off.

    The Kerry girls received the death penalty from Richardson and his three associates, two of whom are on death row. The fourth and youngest defendant, then 15, pleaded guilty and turned state’s evidence in exchange for a life sentence.

    Understand that this isn’t like a lot of dicey capital-murder cases, filled with contradictions and circumstantial evidence and brutish police work. Indeed, there doesn’t seem to be any doubt at all, much less reasonable doubt, that Richardson and the others did the deeds.

    At one point or another, all of the defendants confessed to the crime. Richardson and two others recanted, but they were battered in court by the eyewitness testimony of Cummins and the fourth defendant, Daniel Winfrey. Police also found hard physical evidence — a flashlight and Cummins’ stolen watch — linking the defendants to the crime scene.

    Richardson and company weren’t aided by the parade of tearful witnesses attesting to the wonderful, caring nature of the Kerry sisters — this was one of the most emotionally charged murder cases ever tried in the St. Louis area — but it still can’t be argued plausibly that they were denied a fair trial. Indeed, there were three separate trials, with three juries, three guilty verdicts and three death sentences.

    So it’s not a case about getting the wrong guy, only about whether our society is disgraced by not drawing a distinction between its disposition of a 16-year-old rapist-murderer and an older, wiser rapist-murderer of, say, 18 or 21. Once again, I must be hardening, because I’m having trouble following the moral imperative of this distinction.

    If 16-year-olds are children incapable of understanding the consequences of their actions, why are they allowed to drive?

    No doubt the mental-retardation angle is a better one for Richardson’s army of sympathizers, and the Post reports that both legislative houses in Missouri have bills approved at the committee level that would exempt the retarded from the death penalty. But it’s not the law yet, and it definitely wasn’t the law in 1991 when the Kerry girls died at the hands of Richardson and the others.

    Is that fair to Richardson? Arguably not. But unless Holden chooses to usurp the Legislature’s role for this one case — and, likely, assure himself status as a one-term governor in the process — he has little choice but to allow the law to be enforced as it sits on the books.

    Besides, what’s really unfair to Richardson is an aspect of the story reported last week by Post columnist Bill McClellan, noting that Richardson apparently would not be facing the death penalty were it not for an anti-death-penalty activist. According to McClellan, the state offered a life sentence in exchange for a guilty plea, Richardson’s lawyers recommended it and he was ready to accept.

    After a jailhouse visit from a fellow from a group calling itself the Coalition for Justice, Richardson changed his mind, went to trial and received the death penalty, McClellan reported. In a perfect world, that doesn’t happen. People claiming to hold someone’s life precious don’t take chances with that life to make a larger political point.

    Then again, in a perfect world, Julie and Robin Kerry would be 30 and 29.

  • The Champ

    The village of Champ sits on a plot of land overlooking the busy interchange where Interstates 70 and 270 meet in a tangled web of concrete. It isn’t much. There’s a massive limestone quarry carved into the hillside, owned by Fred Weber Inc.; a sprawling set of buildings belonging to Grace Church; and, beyond a metal gate bearing a faded “No Trespassing” sign, four neatly kept ranch-style houses lining one side of a street. A fifth home is under construction.

    Champ is so small, in fact, that with just 14 residents, it ranks as the tiniest municipality in all of St. Louis County. There are no signs delineating its boundaries, no City Hall. And Champ’s five-member board of trustees, which governs the village, comprises half of the adult population.

    More than four decades ago, when Champ was officially incorporated, the village’s founder, Bill Bangert, pictured more. Much more. In his mind’s eye, he could imagine a massive 115,000-seat domed stadium that could accommodate virtually any sport — baseball, football, track and field, swimming and diving, basketball or hockey — and the largest of conventions. His vision included a huge restaurant with enough seats for 1,500 people, suspended nearly 400 feet in the air at the apex of the dome and accessed by moving sidewalks 600 feet long. His sports center would include a shopping mall with 2 million square feet of retail space and a 27,000-car underground parking garage that could be converted into a fallout shelter large enough to accommodate 600,000 people.

    This wouldn’t be just any stadium. “METRO,” as he called it, was meant to be an Olympic stadium, an $87 million behemoth grandiose enough to lure the Pan American Games and the Summer Olympics. As a former mayor of Berkeley who’d founded a successful road-building company, Bangert was an imposing man who figured anything was possible. This was a man who had literally dodged a bullet fired through his car window and once competed in a national shot-put competition at Madison Square Garden while blind in both eyes, finishing in second place. He figured he could overcome the odds with his planned municipality, which he hoped to pay for using an unusual bond-financing scheme. He eagerly promoted his grand plan, taking a scale model of his stadium to meetings with potential backers in Chicago, Washington, D.C., and even far-away Yugoslavia. “I can’t miss, absolutely,” Bangert said in 1959, the year the village of Champ was incorporated. “I believe construction will start this spring, that it will be in operation by 1962.”

    But the stadium Bangert envisioned was never built, and numerous obstacles meant that Bangert would never develop his 300-acre village or adjoining industrial park, either. His 4,800-square-foot home built in the village was foreclosed on, and he was forced to file for bankruptcy. In the late 1970s, his personal and professional life in shambles, Bangert moved west to California to get away from it all. But the village of Champ remained on the map.

    More than two decades passed before Bangert returned home to Missouri. He now lives in a comfortable frame home with a big front porch in rural Marthasville, more than 40 miles from Champ. And so much time has passed that his idea of a domed stadium is no longer futuristic; nor is his proposal to develop the vast floodplain, now called Riverport. Bangert, now 77, figures his timing was off. “They accused me of being 30 years ahead of my time, and they were just about right,” he says, chuckling. But Bangert isn’t sitting around reflecting on the past. He’s still throwing the shot put and the discus and winning medals across the country, and his mind continues to churn out unusual ideas, albeit on a smaller scale — from staging a “commemorative Olympics” in St. Louis in 2004 to displaying a long-forgotten religious painting at Busch Stadium.


    The seeds for Bill Bangert’s dream for the village of Champ were planted long before he took steps to incorporate the swath of farmland near the site of what was to be a major interchange of two highways. Athletics had long been important to Bangert, a man who stood 6-foot-5 and weighed 265 pounds then, and he dreamed of becoming the first athlete to compete in the Olympics in both boxing and track and field.

    Bangert played football and baseball at Berkeley High School and, later, at the University of Missouri, where he established a reputation as a top track-and-field competitor as well, winning the NCAA discus throw in 1944 and 1945. He was also an accomplished singer, a baritone who attended his final year of college, at Purdue University, on a glee-club scholarship. He later met his wife, a former Muny Opera singer, while both were soloists at Central Presbyterian Church in Clayton.

    Bangert continued to compete after college, holding the Amateur Athletic Union championship for the shot put in 1945 and 1946. He gained fame as a St. Louis Golden Gloves champion and hoped to qualify for the Olympics in boxing, but he lost in the semifinals of the Olympic Trials.

    Bangert’s family owned a successful road-building company and St. Louis County Transit Co. In 1947, he started Bill Bangert Construction Co. as a one-man hauling venture, but he would later go into business with his two brothers, including his twin, in Bangert Bros. Road Builders Inc. And he ventured into politics: Elected mayor of Berkeley in 1950, he served for more than six years. For Bangert, that time was punctuated by tremendous swings of fate.

    At age 28, Bangert lost sight in his left eye because of a disease that caused recurrent hemorrhaging in the microscopic blood vessels surrounding his retina, resulting in scar tissue that caused the retina to detach. The disease soon affected his right eye as well, resulting in total blindness. He feared he’d never see again, until surgery in the spring of 1952 miraculously restored vision in his right eye. Bangert was able to see his daughter, 16-month-old Sharon, for the first time since shortly after her birth.

    In 1954, Bangert decided to run for Congress as a Republican, promising the “singingest campaign you ever heard.” When he received a threatening note warning him to “lay off the labor men in this campaign,” it made the newspapers, though Bangert publicly dismissed the threat as the work of a crank. But two weeks later, in a bizarre incident, Bangert told Berkeley police that his car had been struck by a bullet as he was driving home around midnight, shortly after dropping off a babysitter. To this day, Bangert is unsure whether he was an intended target or the victim of an errant gunshot, but the .32-caliber bullet entered his left front window, hit a metal molding and ricocheted onto the seat. Splinters of glass from the window lodged in his left eye, requiring surgery. Luckily, Bangert says, his left eye was his blind eye.

    Bangert lost the race for Congress, but he wasn’t discouraged. He continued to serve as mayor of Berkeley until 1957, when he resigned after voters eliminated the mayor’s seat and opted for a council/manager form of government. In 1958, he left his job at Bangert Bros. and announced his plans for the village of Champ.


    Bangert had hatched a plan for what he described as a “controlled municipality.” Combining his interests in government, business and sports, he came up with his idea for the domed stadium at the intersection of what was then the Mark Twain Expressway and a proposed circumferential highway — what St. Louis now has in I-70 and I-270 — about five miles west of Lambert Airport.

    His idea was a novel one. He wanted to legally incorporate a small village of about 300 acres on undeveloped farmland, where the stadium would be built, and issue tax-exempt revenue bonds to finance construction of the stadium and a massive shopping mall. Rentals to businesses occupying the facilities would go to retiring the bonds, and the rent payments could be written off by the businesses as operating costs, resulting in a savings in federal income taxes.

    The municipality would provide no fire or police services and would have just a skeleton crew of residents, including Bangert and his family — just enough people to form an official municipal body to oversee the stadium and surrounding businesses. He hired an architect to draw up plans and brought a scale model to a meeting at the Chase Hotel of city and county business and government officials. He hoped to lure the 1964 Summer Olympics.

    Bangert built a large four-bedroom French colonial for his family, complete with a circular drive surrounding a removable aluminum flagpole. Bangert sometimes tossed the flagpole like a caber — he actually used it in several track meets. Naming the village was easy. He called it Champ. He explains: “Because of the connection to sports and athletics. It was the epitome of sports, so that’s why I chose it.” Perhaps coincidentally, perhaps not — depending on whom you ask — it was also the last name of one of Bangert’s early partners in the venture, Norman Champ, who served on the Berkeley Board of Aldermen when Bangert was mayor and was owner of Champ Spring Co. Champ the businessman bought 120 acres of what became Champ the village.

    “I went to the [Missouri] Legislature and asked to incorporate the village, and they did, and the [St. Louis] County Council did, too,” Bangert says. “It wasn’t easy. We really incorporated mainly to build the stadium, the enclosed stadium. At that time, all we had in St. Louis was Sportsman’s Park at Grand and Hebert in North St. Louis, and it was very obsolete.”

    “The idea caught on right away,” Bangert says, “a restaurant 350 feet up in the dome, surrounded by a shopping center. Back then, all we had were the beginnings of shopping centers. This was one big giant mall that would have been bigger than any mall in the United States, even today. We had a lot of people excited about it. The shopping was combined with the stadium, so someone who didn’t want to watch a football game could go shopping.”

    Back in 1959, when Champ was incorporated, then-County Supervisor James H.J. McNary called the project “a great thing for St. Louis County, its neighbors and the entire metropolitan area of St. Louis,” according to newspaper accounts. George Halas Jr., son of then-Chicago Bears owner George Halas, was among the celebrities who attended dedication ceremonies. “It’s a magnificent project and I hope it is built,” he told the St. Louis Globe-Democrat. “These huge stadiums must come eventually.” Representatives of five businesses declared their intentions to locate at the facilities once they were built. They included the president of the Chase Hotel and Edward and Donald Schnuck of Schnuck Markets.

    But not everyone was enthusiastic. Much of the opposition came from downtown St. Louis interests: “They thought it would relocate the center of gravity of St. Louis and disturb Downtown Inc., etc., and they weren’t going to have [a stadium] out in the county, that’s for sure.” Bangert says environmentalists also opposed development in the floodplain. And by the summer of 1959, Champ — with a population of 14 residents, half of them Bangert and his family — was dealt its first blow when Gov. James Blair vetoed a bill, approved by two-thirds of the Legislature, that would have allowed the village to issue $87.5 million in revenue bonds to build the stadium and shopping center. After that, things began to spiral downward.

    Bangert, and others, say his talk of a domed stadium in the county spurred downtown businessmen to pursue more vigorously the idea of an open-air stadium in downtown St. Louis (Busch Stadium opened in 1966). And because of that, Bangert began to shift his focus somewhat, pushing to create an industrial park on the floodplain next to Champ. But even those plans were dealt one setback after another. The County Council refused to allow the annexation of 3,100 acres in 1961 and suggested that Champ disincorporate because its plans for the stadium were not materializing. A grand jury was convened to look into whether steps should be taken to dissolve the village, and the next year, Thomas Eagleton, then the state’s attorney general, started legal proceedings to dissolve the village — a case that ended up before the Missouri Supreme Court twice.

    Eagleton says he can’t recall all the details, but he describes Bangert as a “real promoter who concocted all kinds of pipe dreams that I deemed to be unrealistic.”

    The Supreme Court later ruled that although the village was legally incorporated, it could not annex the 3,100 acres, finding that the village was “not equipped to supply any services to the annexed area.” But Bangert wouldn’t give up, and in 1965 and 1967, Champ attempted to annex about 1,000 acres. Bangert continued to cling to his dream, going to New York in 1967 to bid for the 1971 Pan American Games. In 1968, he competed in the Highland Games in Scotland. He made a run for lieutenant governor, filing as a Democrat, with a platform that included bringing the Olympic Games to Missouri in 1976 and promoting horse racing as a means of subsidizing the school system and reducing taxes. Once again, Bangert lost the race.

    In 1969, the Missouri Supreme Court again ruled against the annexations. The long court fights doomed Bangert’s efforts to develop Champ. “When the Supreme Court denied our annexation, what could I do with the land?” Bangert says. “I couldn’t sell it as industry. I couldn’t develop it. I couldn’t do anything with it.” And although the R.C. Can Co. relocated to Champ, no other industries followed. Bangert filed for bankruptcy in 1971, listing debts of $3.3 million. He lost his home, the French colonial where he and his wife raised their five daughters, and every bit of land he owned in Champ.

    Bangert acknowledges that his scheme was troubling to some. “In my case, it was the solo enterprise they objected to, so I was my own worst enemy,” he says. “They felt no one person should have control of 3,000 acres and develop it with public financing.” Still, he has no regrets: “I think I did all I could.”

    Norm Champ Jr., whose father bought 120 acres of what became Champ, describes Bangert’s plan as a “house of cards” built on other people’s money. He says his father got involved with Bangert when the family’s land, near Lambert Airport, was being taken for use by the expanding airport: “They kept taking our land away and our land away, and when they do that, you can reinvest, and we bought this land and sold it for a profit. [Bangert] came up with this proposition to create Champ, Mo., and to build a stadium and incorporate it into a city and invite the Olympics. We got involved,” Champ says, “because Champ is a more Olympic name than Bangert.”

    But it all fell apart. Bangert, Champ says, never had the money to exercise the options on the adjoining 1,500 acres and gave one landowner $30,000 in earnest money using a worthless check, telling him: “Don’t cash it — it will bounce.” In another instance, Champ says, Bangert “had this trench dug, and he was going to have a canal in from the river, and I said, ‘Bill, how did you afford to get this trench dug?’ and he said, ‘I gave him an option on the land,’ and I said, ‘Bill, you don’t own the land.’” (Bangert says he did write a $30,000 check to the landowner but says it wasn’t supposed to be cashed unless he exercised the option. As for the trench’s being paid for with an option, Bangert says, Champ “has got something mixed up.”)

    Champ says a combination of factors killed Bangert’s dream. “When the state declared it couldn’t be incorporated and the county fought this thing of building the buildings and having them be tax-free, it was just beat down,” he says. “There were too many people against it. It ended with Bill filing for bankruptcy. Bill’s fun, he’s interesting, he has great ideas. He’s a character out of this world. But I have a saying about a lot of people, especially in politics: If they tell me the sun’s going to come up tomorrow morning, I’m going to check, because, odds are, it won’t.”

    Champ does believe the stadium was a good idea. And he credits Bangert’s domed stadium with pushing downtown forces into action. “The timing was such [that] it really put Busch Stadium on the map. It really moved them to go ahead with Busch Stadium. It is what finally pushed them over the edge, and I give him credit for that.”

    For Bangert, the professional losses took a toll on his personal life and nearly ended his marriage. In the late 1970s, he headed west to California to get away from it all. “It was pretty tough,” he says. “After a while, a certain bitterness sets in. I felt if I were going to get on with my life, I had to get away from this whole thing and start over.” He moved to Anaheim, managed commercial properties and lived in the shadow of Disneyland.

    He continued to take part in shot-put and discus competitions, and he and his wife regularly sang together in Christian operas and, once, on Robert Schuller’s Hour of Power. He wrote a screenplay based on his life and his lifelong romance with his wife, figuring he might as well while he was so close to Hollywood. He pitched it to Disney.

    Bangert describes his story: “It was the idea of staging the Olympic Games; I was a national champion in track and field and boxing — that and the romantic angle of my wife and I and our singing together in opera. I think it carries forth a lot of romance,” he says. “It could make a very romantic story. I see a lot of junk on television today that has no storyline whatsoever. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out there is a lot of human interest in that.”

    Disney wasn’t interested.


    Over time, road-builder Fred Weber Inc. bought up much of the land in Champ and continued digging in what is now a massive limestone quarry. Champ remained a municipality — one of more than 90 incorporated small cities in St. Louis County — and though the village’s population has fluctuated over the years, today it stands at 14. It is still governed by a five-member board of trustees. Mary Kinsella, who has lived in Champ for 18 years, is the clerk. Her husband, Matthew, is the chairman. He works for Fred Weber, and they rent one of four homes in Champ, also owned by Fred Weber.

    “The thing about the village,” Kinsella says, “is, it’s like living in the country but being in the suburbs. We have deer, coyote, wild turkeys in October. It’s kind of removed from the city atmosphere, yet it’s right here at 70 and 270,” she says. “We still function as a village; we have a monthly meeting with the board of trustees, and business goes on as usual. We just keep plodding along.” After elections, Kinsella says, it isn’t unusual to get calls from the media inquiring about Champ’s 100 percent voter turnout. But with 10 voters, getting good turnout isn’t that hard, she says.

    Anyone driving by Champ might miss it in a blink. “How would you know you were in Champ?” Kinsella asks. “It doesn’t have any distinguishing factors that would say, ‘I just went through the village of Champ.’ There are no signs that say you are in the village of Champ. You wouldn’t know you were in something different,” she says. Kinsella, in fact, doesn’t even tell people she lives in Champ. “Goodness, no,” she says. “Then I have to explain it to people, and they just stare at me.”

    Most of Champ today is, quite literally, a hole in the ground, and what may be most remarkable is the massive development that has sprouted up around it, including the hotels and office buildings of Riverport, Riverport Amphitheatre and other Earth City development. As for Bangert, there’s nothing in the village he founded that honors him, but Kinsella says residents have heard of him: “I never met Bill Bangert, but I knew about him when I moved back up here; people in general know about him, from reading about it.” Out of curiosity, she says, “I looked up stuff in the Post from way back when.”

    Back in the late ’50s, many questioned the wisdom of Bangert’s idea of commercial and industrial development in that floodplain — yet that is precisely what occurred in the years after Bangert left. “They said I was 30 years ahead of my time, and it was about 30 years before it took off,” he says. “There is no way I could have held onto it that long, but if they’d left me alone, it would’ve taken off like a house on fire!” Bangert says his proposed form of financing for constructing new facilities — municipal bonds paid for by the leases of the business that occupy the facilities — resembles today’s tax-increment financing (TIF). “It’s all based on the same thing, that taxes generated from that project go to the city for a specific purpose, and that’s what they’re doing.” Bangert was among the region’s first advocates of urban sprawl — he proposed a massive shopping mall 20 minutes from downtown long before malls had sprouted on the suburban landscape, and his idea for a domed stadium preceded the country’s first, the Houston Astrodome.

    Because of his seemingly outlandish ideas, Bangert “wasn’t treated very nicely by the media,” says Carl Stifel, who was involved in some of the real-estate deals involving Champ. “He was ahead of his time in his ideas, but a lot of them were very, very good.”

    Former St. Louis County Executive Gene McNary remembers when Bangert ran against former County Supervisor Lawrence Roos. “I remember the debate, because Bill Bangert was quite a character. He had gone to the Scottish Highland Games and was some kind of he-man discus-thrower or shot-putter. I think he was exceptional, and he went away with a medal. I don’t know the whole story, but he was famous for that, and he talked about it in the debate — how he’d won all these medals and he was happy about it but he’d really be happier if he was elected county supervisor.” Bangert lost.

    But, McNary says, as crazy as some of Bangert’s ideas may have seemed decades ago, they don’t seem so crazy now: “It was so far off, and, yet, where is the village of Champ? That’s where Riverport is. Today there is an amphitheater there, and that’s where I was going to put a domed stadium in order to keep the football Cardinals in town. So Bill Bangert wasn’t so far off with his ideas, but he sure was pretty far ahead of his time.”


    After an absence of nearly 20 years from Missouri, Bangert and his wife, Rosemary, returned in 1997 to be closer to two of his five daughters, one of whom now lives down the street from him and another who lives in OFallon, Mo. At his home in Marthasville, he still works out for at least an hour every day, throwing a discus in the yard that his dog, Jake, fetches for him. He exercises on a treadmill, ski machine and stationary bike in his basement. More than three dozen medals hang on the wall — all of which Bangert won after he turned 70. He says it is athletics that has helped him get through his many defeats. “Competition has been an antidote for me to deal with all these problems,” he says. “I could come home and work out for an hour and get rid of all that tension. Athletics really saved my life.”

    He has kept busy competing in events across the country and in Canada, in senior and masters games, regularly finishing in first or second place. Rosemary was recently Mrs. Senior Missouri. Bangert takes some credit for it: “I was competing in an event in Columbia, and I heard about this contest, and I said, ‘Do you mind if I enter my wife?’ She was visiting my daughter in Florida, and I called her up on the phone and said, ‘I entered you in this contest for Mrs. Senior Missouri.’ She said, ‘Oh my goodness.’ She wasn’t too happy about it.” But Bangert notes that she took home the big trophy, now prominently displayed in his basement workout room. “I won my event, and she won hers.”

    In 1998, Bangert ran unsuccessfully as a U.S. Taxpayers Party candidate for Warren County presiding commissioner, saying he hoped to become the oldest elected official to win a world championship in the World Veterans Games. And he has continued to churn out ideas. One involved creating a 200-acre island at the confluence of the Missouri and Mississippi rivers with a massive fountain that could shoot a stream of water more than 1,000 feet in the air, a monument to the bicentennial of the 1804 Lewis and Clark expedition. “People come from all over to see things animated,” he says. “People are always interested in fountains and things like that.” The idea got him a story in the Post-Dispatch, but that’s about it.

    Bangert has also written letters with his idea for a “Commemorative Olympics” he would like to see staged at Washington University in 2004 in celebration of the centennial of the 1904 Olympics held in St. Louis. The games, he says, would be senior games but open to anyone in the world who wanted to compete. He figures the medals could be created to look like the medals won in 1904. Besides, he hopes to compete in those games. He’ll be 80 years old.

    The idea that has really captured Bangert’s fancy is one he believes could rectify a 97-year-old slight to a Polish artist who came to America in 1904 to show his work at the World’s Fair.

    Bangert learned about the artist, Jan Styka, about 10 years ago, while still living in California. He and his wife were invited to give a concert on the life of Christ, based on African-American folk songs, at the Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Glendale, Calif. They performed in front of a massive painting, called “The Crucifixion,” that was 195 feet long and 45 feet high.

    According to a history of the painting compiled by Forest Lawn, the painting took seven years to complete. Styka received an invitation to display that painting, and others, at the 1904 World Exposition in St. Louis. But when he arrived in New York, he was told there was no facility at the fair that could house a painting as large as “The Crucifixion.” He left the painting at a warehouse in New York and traveled on to St. Louis, where, on the last night of the fair, all of his canvases were destroyed in a fire. When he returned to New York, he learned customs officials had seized his huge painting for nonpayment of duty. He never saw the painting again.

    Years later, Hubert Eaton, who founded the Forest Lawn Memorial Parks in Southern California, heard about the painting and began searching for it. In 1944, one of Eaton’s representatives found it in a Chicago warehouse, wrapped around a 60-foot telephone pole. He bought it, brought the painting to California and built a special building to house it.

    Bangert believes St. Louis citizens should get a chance to see the painting. “Nobody knows of this,” he says. “It’s sort of a hidden venture, and the only reason it was not shown was it was too big to be seen, so it lay in a warehouse.” His idea involves creating a smaller replica painting measuring about 20 feet long that could be displayed at Busch Stadium in a 10-inch-deep lightbox with a pedestal describing the painting’s history. The painting’s actual dimensions could be marked off with some kind of tape so people could see just how big the actual painting is. “It could be done very cheaply,” he says, “and it would draw people downtown and from all over the world.” Bangert has written and spoken to representatives of St. Louis 2004 about his idea, but, so far, it hasn’t gone far.

    “I got a price on having the original [reproduced], and it was less than $10,000. It’s a pittance, and I suggested it to 2004 committee. I said I’d arrange to get financing for it, from athletes and such interested in such a thing, if only they would get permission from Busch Stadium to put it there. They’re going to tear it down anyway a year or two after 2004 anyway, if their plans go ahead.” But he hasn’t gotten much response from officials with 2004. “They said they wished me luck on it, and so forth.”

    Peter Sortino, president of St. Louis 2004, is unfamiliar with the details of Bangert’s idea but says the proposal sounds “very interesting.” As planning for a 2004 celebration moves forward, Sortino says, it will be given some consideration. “There are going to be a lot of people involved in the celebration — it’s much bigger than me considering it,” he says. “There are going to be a lot of ideas, and they have to be vetted to a certain degree. This is one idea that could possibly be something.”

    Displaying a replica of a long-forgotten religious painting is likely Bangert’s last grand idea. And this is a man full of unusual ideas. When he dies, for instance, he wants to be cremated and to have his remains put into the objects that represent the track-and-field events he’s competed in — such as a shot put — and given as “a memento” to his daughters.

    But of all his ideas, Champ remains his favorite. Every time he drives into St. Louis, Bangert says, he makes a point of cruising by the village. All that is left of his home is a driveway leading to a precipitous drop-off at the edge of the quarry. Still, Bangert views Champ as his greatest accomplishment.

    “It will always be there,” Bangert says. “They may have wiped me out, but they can’t wipe away the history of it. It’s there. I started it, and I don’t care who reaped all the profits — they can’t deny that it’s there.”

    And Bangert says he has no bitterness over the way things turned out. “There was a time when I felt an injustice in not necessarily sharing in the wealth it created but in sort of the propriety of seeing it through,” he says. “But I found out a long time ago, as an athlete, you have to lose before you can become a real champion. You have to experience losses. That was one of them. And, at 77 years old today, I don’t have any regrets at all. God has been very good to me.”

  • Gentry Trotter Gets Burned

    Gentry Trotter can take care of himself, and usually he can take care of the media, but these last few weeks, things haven’t worked out so well. He was one of the principals mentioned in a page 1 banner-headline article in the Sunday, Jan. 7, Post-Dispatch about the dysfunctional City Living Foundation. He made headlines later that week in regard to threats he allegedly made to KMOX (1120 AM), and then, as a result of all that hubbub, he lost his lucrative public-relations contract with Lambert International Airport.

    A lesser man would crawl off the canvas, retreating somewhere to lick his wounds. But not Gentry. He’s more than willing to strike back at this hamlet’s version of Radio Moscow and Pravda. Mr. Trotter thinks he’s been treated unfairly. He’s only begun to fight. Or sue.

    Trotter’s travail began as more stories percolated into print about the City Living Foundation, the nonprofit corporation formed in 1995, criticized in the media as early as 1999 for not doing anything and disbanded in September 2000. The defunct group was the topic of the most recent Carolyn Tuft-written Post-Dispatch opus, chronicling the long-ineffective history of the foundation, which received $272,000 in city funds but never produced any ads. Trotter received $19,588 of that amount. For starters, Trotter described Tuft’s piece as merely a rehash of previous stories. “It was a regurgitation,” Trotter says. “All it was was a chronology. They could have hired a librarian to type it up in chronological order.”

    A meeting with the Post-Dispatch editorial board that week didn’t help matters. Trotter and Ed Finkelstein — both City Living board members who also did public-relations consulting work for the foundation — sat down with the Post brain trust. According to Trotter, much of the time was spent with Finkelstein and Tuft, arguing, and little or no progress was made. “I felt like I was talking to the Politburo. I’m serious. I thought I was somewhere in old Russia or China now, some Politburo,” says Trotter. “The Post-Dispatch, the “Communist Gazette,’ they decide what’s good for you, who gets the castor oil and who gets the enema. That’s what they do. They make those decisions. In this case, it was “Hey, Gentry’s ass is up next.’”

    But after haggling over interpretations in the article, Trotter figured some perceptions did improve. “We went from being thieves to just being dumb. That’s progress. Dumb people don’t get indicted, just thieves,” he says.

    But things got worse on the airwaves. The story was a topic on KMOX; Morning Meeting hosts Charles Brennan and McGraw Milhaven talked up the story on two days, and Trotter called in to the show on Tuesday, Jan. 9. “So if you were driving down the street listening, you’d think, “That Gentry Trotter’s an asshole, he’s incompetent and he represents all these other people, too,” says Trotter. “I was nailed.” On Thursday, Jan. 11, Trotter and Finkelstein were guests.

    Trotter took offense at how Brennan handled the issue on the first day and called station manager Karen Carroll, who was on vacation. The voice-mail transcript of Trotter’s message to Carroll was read on Thursday’s show and repeated in Friday’s Post. The message included the sentence “I can’t put any money on the air now for the airport,” suggesting that as a result of the on-air discussion of the City Living story, Trotter would not buy KMOX airtime for the airport. Trotter claims this is nonsense because the airport didn’t have any ads on the station and didn’t plan to run any.

    “People pull advertising just for farting,” Trotter says. “Everybody knows in the industry if I were a white advertising agency, I could pick up the phone for whatever reason and cancel ads because it’s done every day with city money, federal money, government money, Mama’s money and anybody’s money. And I didn’t cancel any ads.”

    But by then, it was too late. Politics entered the picture when mayoral candidate and Aldermanic President Francis G. Slay demanded that the airport cancel Trotter’s contract. Slay accused Trotter of using his position with the airport to advance a personal agenda at KMOX. It probably didn’t help that Trotter is a campaign donor and supporter of Mayor Clarence Harmon. “All of a sudden, we got caught up in a political whirlwind. I can understand the whirlwind, but you don’t say somebody’s guilty and hang them without giving them a hearing. You owe people a hearing,” says Trotter, who learned of the cancellation of his airport contract through the media. “We’re asking the Airport Commission to hear our side. What they decided to do was based on what Slay said — “Hang ’em high, and hang ’em often.’”

    The morphing of the City Living fiasco into the dissolution of Trotter’s airport contract took place during the same week as the initial John Ashcroft attorney-general hearings. As a Republican fundraiser who defected from Ashcroft’s camp during the Ronnie White flap, Trotter was getting calls from both sides of the issue. The national media were on the phone, trying to mine data about Ashcroft. “This was going on while I was being lynched about the airport,” says Trotter. “I’m being screwed over by a bunch of Republicans and lynched by Democrats. Boy, what a week. That will drive you to someone like Ross Perot.”

    Trotter plans legal action against KMOX for tampering with his clients, and he’s asked for corrections and clarifications from the Post. He thinks airport director Leonard Griggs violated sunshine laws by calling Airport Commission members to lobby for Trotter’s dismissal, and he hopes to plead his case at the February Airport Commission meeting. Trotter vows to fight on.

    “Everything’s quiet now,” Trotter says. “You don’t hear anything about City Living now. Everybody’s hunky-dory, and the black man got screwed.”


    It’s Ralph Nader! It’s Clarence Darrow! No, it’s Rob Lee! Apparently Lee, whose consumer struggles with Bo Beuckman Ford [“Short Cuts,” RFT, Dec. 6, 2000] got him coverage on KMOV-TV (Channel 4) and two articles in the crusading weekly you are now reading, also has legal skills.

    Beuckman took Lee to court to get a restraining order to keep him from demonstrating in front of the Ford dealership, but the dealership’s expensive Thompson Coburn lawyer was no match for Lee, who defended himself. The court ruled in favor of Lee, allowing him to continue his picketing in front of the West County dealer as long as he stayed off his property and didn’t resort to allegations about Beuckman’s breaking any laws. Saying “BO RIPPED US OFF!” apparently is okeedokee.

  • See No Evil

    In a quiet South St. Louis neighborhood near Lindenwood Park, Denise Wolff rounded a corner and headed toward her tidy two-bedroom home on Bancroft Avenue. She was behind the wheel of her brand-new, loaded Chrysler Cirrus LX — fresh off the dealer’s lot just days earlier.

    As a card dealer at the President Casino on the Admiral, Denise usually worked the overnight shift from 8 p.m.-4 a.m., and on this warm summer morning, July 17, 1997, she’d clocked out at 4:09 a.m. She’d been in an unusually good mood. She chatted with a co-worker who drove her to the lot where she had parked under the Poplar Street Bridge, plucked off her car a note written by a man she’d been having an affair with and, still a bit giddy over the relationship, told her friend she had a “pocketful of them.” Denise then drove off. She stopped briefly at the drive-through of a Hardee’s on Hampton Avenue to pick up a breakfast sandwich. It was still dark outside, and as Denise neared her home, only the mercury-vapor street lights cast a faint glow on her surroundings.

    The 39-year-old mother of two was terrified of the South Side Rapist — a notorious serial rapist who wasn’t caught until late 1998 — so much so that she had had a motion-activated floodlight installed near her driveway. When she came home before dawn or after dusk, she would almost always pull her car straight into the garage. This Thursday morning, Denise did not. Instead, she got out of her car, walked down the driveway and — perhaps toward someone or something — across the sidewalk in her frontyard. She made it past only a few squares of concrete before a sudden burst of gunfire brought her crashing to the ground. The bullets pierced the garage door, the trim, the frame of a front window. They ripped through Denise’s legs and torso.

    The noise roused slumbering neighbors up and down Bancroft and on nearby Wenzlick and Prather avenues, many of whom peered out their windows and called 911. They reported the sound of gunshots, and most of them also described seeing a gray or silver conversion van driving away from the scene with its headlights off, heading east on Bancroft, then north on Wenzlick.

    Denise lay crumpled on the sidewalk, her body riddled with bullet wounds. Her pink Bic lighter and a pack of Salems were scattered around her, along with her keyring and a brown paper bag containing her uneaten Hardee’s breakfast. Clutched in her fingers were the handwritten notes from her lover, a married man who also worked at the casino.

    The first person to reach her was a neighbor, an off-duty police officer who awoke at 4:37 a.m. to the sound of gunfire — two controlled shots, then a rapid succession of 10 to 15 more. He found Denise lying facedown on the sidewalk, bleeding from numerous wounds. There wasn’t much he could do.

    A police officer dispatched to the scene was told Denise’s husband lived about 100 yards away in a house at the corner of Bancroft and Jamieson avenues. He knocked at the door, and Larry Wolff, a city plumbing inspector who’d been legally separated from Denise for seven years, quickly answered, wearing a pair of boxer shorts. He told the officer he hadn’t heard a thing.

    Paramedics arrived within minutes, and as they struggled to stabilize Denise’s condition, her husband stood in front of the ambulance. The police officers noted that his gaze seemed focused away from his wife, bleeding on the ground. Denise was transported, alone, to Barnes-Jewish Hospital. A doctor pronounced her dead at 5:41 a.m. The bullets had lacerated her kidney, colon, spleen, bowel and bladder, fractured several bones and caused massive bleeding.

    It was a sudden and violent death for a woman who had led a rather unassuming life. Even in those early hours of the investigation, however, all of the signs suggested Denise was targeted for death, not the victim of some chance shooting. “This was a purposeful, vicious crime,” St. Louis Police Capt. Dave Heath would later say, addressing the television cameras. “We are not looking at this to be a random act under any circumstances.” Outside Denise’s home on Bancroft, police officers and crime-scene technicians strung up yellow crime-scene tape and placed a brown paper silhouette of her body on her sidewalk. This was a homicide investigation, and the questions on their minds were obvious: Who killed Denise Wolff? And why?


    By all accounts, Denise was a devoted mother to her two girls, who were born 13 years apart in separate marriages. Jennie, who lived with Denise, was 10; Angie Erickson was married, with a 3-year-old son, and her belly was bulging with another child. Denise’s second grandchild was due at the end of September, and she couldn’t wait.

    As a single mom who’d been legally separated from her husband for years, Denise had gone to dealer’s school because it seemed like a fun way to make a decent living without investing huge amounts of time or money in training and education. She’d made her family and friends play cards every night when she was enrolled in dealer school, shuffling and shuffling until she got it just right. She was a night owl, so the first chance she got, she asked for the overnight shift. It also gave her more time to spend with Jennie. Denise stood about 5 feet 4 inches tall and weighed about 140 pounds. Of Lebanese descent, she had dark eyes and hair that she dyed a shade of red. She spent her nights working at the President Casino, earning more than $40,000 a year dealing cards at blackjack tables and spinning the roulette wheel. She loved the lights, the sounds, the slot machines, the people, the excitement of it all. “It’s like going to a party every night,” she’d say. Denise had worked on the Admiral about three years after first breaking into the business at the Casino Queen.

    When Denise wasn’t working, she was almost always with her family, whether she was bass fishing or playing bingo with her mother in Washington County near Potosi or taking her grandmother, who lived a block away from Denise, out for a day of shopping and French onion soup at Famous-Barr. She liked to putter around her gray frame home, making sure it was “just so,” tending to the zinnias in her garden or her multicolored rosebush, splashing around with the kids in her backyard pool. On her days off, she’d have pajama parties with Jennie — an evening of popcorn and movies, just the two of them huddled in front of the VCR. If Johnnie Brock’s had a new shipment of Beanie Babies in, Denise could be found waiting in line, because Jennie loved them. Every Christmas, she showered her daughters with gifts, racking up charges on her credit card no matter how tight the family finances. It was her favorite time of the year. She’d have the tree up and decorated the day after Thanksgiving, without fail. She favored holiday sweaters, much to her older daughter’s chagrin, especially a green one with a snowy landscape scene. She could be incredibly soft-hearted, and her generosity extended beyond her family. One year Denise took in a young girl and her mother who’d ended up at a Salvation Army shelter, buying the child a heap of presents that she could scarcely afford. When one of her friends, also a single mom, was struggling at Christmastime, Denise handed her one of her credit cards and instructed her to shop. “Pay me back whenever you can,” she told her.

    Denise’s birthday was creeping up on her — her 40th would have been in August — and she was dreading it. At the same time, though, family members had begun noticing a surge of confidence and optimism in Denise that they hadn’t seen before, or at least in a long time. At Angie’s urging, Denise got a different haircut, a more up-to-date style. She was going to a tanning booth occasionally, getting manicures, talking about the men at work who flirted with her, such as a St. Louis Blues hockey player who repeatedly asked her out. Denise was flattered by the attention. She was also proud of the career she had carved out for herself, and she cherished the rewards of her hard work, trading her old Ford Escort for the white 1997 Chrysler Cirrus complete with the gold trim package. In the car, Denise listened to the same kind of music as her daughters and kept up with the latest tunes. In July, she and Jennie went out and bought a Third Eye Blind CD with the song “Semi-Charmed Life.” “She used to say that was her life,” Angie recalls. “She’d say, “This is the life I live, a semi-charmed kind of life.’”

    It certainly hadn’t been an easy one.


    Denise grew up in South St. Louis the eldest of four daughters. Even as a child, Denise could be outspoken, hot-tempered and strong-willed. At 16, she insisted on moving out, dropping out of high school and marrying her high-school sweetheart. Her mother, Sandy Cantrell, described that time as Denise’s “hippie stage.” She was pregnant two months later and gave birth to Angie at 17. But the marriage was rocky, and Sandy says her daughter moved back home when she was pregnant. Denise and her husband gave it a second try when their daughter was 3 months old, but it didn’t last. The marriage ended in divorce.

    Denise married a second time when Angie was a toddler. But that marriage was also short-lived. It lasted about a year-and-a-half until Denise met, and fell in love with, Larry Wolff, who was a friend of her second husband’s. They married in 1983 at a ceremony at City Hall. The wedding made the television news. “I didn’t even know she was getting married; I tried to talk her out of it,” Sandy recalls, describing Larry, back then, as a man with long hair who wore chains and boots with big heels. “Denny says to me, “Mom, you ain’t gonna believe this, but watch Channel 4. We got married on TV.’ City Hall had just decided they were going to do small ceremonies, and they wanted to do a little advertisement of what they were doing,” Sandy says. “They had a cake and everything. It was bizarre.”

    That marriage was often rocky. Both Larry and Denise could be stubborn and hot-tempered, Sandy says, and when they had a big argument, the two would race to get home first and move all the furniture out of their house or apartment. Things seemed to settle down somewhat after a few years, and their daughter, whom they named Jennifer Sue, was born in 1987.

    By 1990, the couple had moved into a double-wide trailer in Robertsville, Mo., near Pacific, where Larry’s parents owned 3 acres. Denise felt isolated and bored there with no money and no car. Cathy Hatton, one of Denise’s younger sisters, says Larry would often stay at Cathy’s house in St. Louis, because he was working for the city as a plumbing inspector and had to have a city address, but often, when Denise called to speak to him, Larry wasn’t home, Cathy says. “He stopped buying groceries and paying the bills down there, and he wasn’t coming home,” she says. Denise’s older daughter, Angie, from her first marriage, also did not get along with Larry. Family members disagree on precisely what the final straw was, but eight months after moving to Roberts-ville, Denise called Cathy and told her to rent the biggest U-Haul she could find and help her move out of the trailer while Larry was at work. Cathy did.

    Soon, Denise filed a petition for divorce from Larry. But Larry persuaded her to settle for a legal separation instead, and she agreed.

    Within a few years, Denise bought the home on Bancroft with the help of her grandmother. Larry bought a house a short distance down the street, on Jamieson. Some of Denise’s friends and family members questioned the wisdom of such a move, particularly if Denise ever decided to go through with a divorce, but she told them she figured it was best for their daughter. “When he moved down the street, I said, “You’re nuts. What happens when you’re done with this guy and you want a boyfriend?’” Cathy recalls. “She said, “This is perfect. This way, he can keep Jennie.’” The arrangement seemed to work, at least for a while. Over the years, Denise struggled to make ends meet, working as a waitress at the downtown Radisson Hotel and the Missouri Athletic Club, going to cosmetology school but then deciding hairdressing did not pay enough, cleaning houses and, ultimately, attending dealer school. With their homes so close, Jennie could sleep over at Larry’s when Denise was working nights at the casino. The two maintained an unusual relationship, relatives says. Though they were separated, Larry sometimes slept over at Denise’s and, up until about a year before she died, they occasionally had sex. From time to time, he’d help with the bills, and he regularly cooked meals for the three of them. On holidays, they were together.

    In the six or seven months before Denise’s death, however, things began to change. Denise told her older daughter and her sisters how she was yearning for independence. She told her mother she was tired of having “no life” and needed to find herself a husband she could get along with. She talked about divorcing Larry. And in the few months before she died, she talked about her new lover.


    If Larry knew of any of the changes going on in Denise’s life, he certainly didn’t let police know in the hours after his wife’s murder. Larry told police he didn’t have a clue. He knew of no problems Denise was having; he had no idea why anyone would want to hurt her.

    Angie, Denise’s older daughter, was at Larry’s house, in the same room with him, when police questioned him. A detective asked her to step outside for a brief interview. Who could have done this to your mother? the officer asked. Angie, visibly shaken and crying, motioned with her head back toward Larry, who was inside the house. Her mom had been trying to divorce Larry, she said. They’d been fighting a lot. She’d been dating a man she worked with on the Admiral.

    Other witnesses provided additional tantalizing details. Detectives spoke with Scott Baird, a financial planner with the Travelers Group, who had been working with Denise on obtaining a debt-consolidation loan. He had met with her one week before she was killed; she had told him she was in financial trouble. She was in debt, with a new car and a house payment, and she had cosigned for her husband on his $9,000 car loan, but he hadn’t made payments in more than a year. She also told him she was planning to finalize a divorce from her husband. The loan was approved on July 16, but the financial planner hadn’t been able to reach Denise to give her the news.

    Some family members offered a variety of possible theories that did not point to Larry.

    Denise’s sister Cathy told detectives that Larry fixed Denise meals almost every day, helped her with bills and, even though Denise treated him badly at times, he stuck around and loved her. She said Larry had never shown any signs of violence and that it was Denise who had the short temper. She told police she suspected Denise’s “big mouth” might have had something to do with her murder.

    Another sister, Sue Doetzel, told detectives that although Larry and Denise were separated, she felt they loved each other. They had keys to each others’ homes and, when they were getting along, Denise would ask Larry to help around the house and ask him for money. When Denise was mad at Larry, Sue said, she would tell him she wanted a divorce, and though she had been telling Larry that for several years, she hadn’t actually made an attempt to get one. There was never any violence between the two, as far as she knew. Sue knew of her sister’s affair, and she asked Denise what she would do if Larry found out. “She said she was separated,” Sue recalled, “and it was her house and she could do what she wanted.”

    Sandy, Denise’s mother, says she had her suspicions about Larry, but she wasn’t ready to tell detectives. Instead, she spoke about the casino: Could it have been a disgruntled customer who lost money there? Could it have been related to a complaint her daughter filed against the casino with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission? Sandy told detectives that Denise had been demoted from supervisor to dealer, which meant a cut in pay. Denise’s father, Roy “Buck” Cantrell, told detectives the same thing. “He believes the murder was somehow tied to the boat,” a detective wrote in his report.

    Kandi Maier, a friend of Denise’s and her co-worker at the President, told detectives that Denise had been seeing a male co-worker, John DeBoer, at the casino for about three months and that he was Denise’s first boyfriend since she and Larry separated seven years earlier. Kandi said she had tried to get Denise to date before but that her friend always refused, telling her that her husband “would kill her if she dated another man,” according to police reports. Denise had begun complaining to Kandi that Larry seemed to be watching her every move, so much so that she had begun parking at the rear of her home and entering through the back door to avoid detection. She told Kandi she thought Larry knew of the affair; during a recent phone conversation, he walked in and demanded to know to whom she was talking. When she told him it was none of his business, according to police reports, he replied: “It’s either Kandi or John.”

    Another co-worker and friend, Joyce Jeraldine, told police that Denise told her she and Larry argued all the time, though he did not physically abuse her. On one occasion, Jeraldine said, Denise described how Larry put a gun to her head, then pulled the trigger. She told her friend Larry was doing it “just to scare her. The gun was empty.” She said Denise told her that if Larry learned of her relationship with John, he would “blow her fucking head off.” Denise was falling in love with John, she told Jeraldine, and about two weeks before the murder she had given him an ultimatum: Leave his wife or end the relationship. She said he told her he needed time to decide what to do. And recently, Jeraldine added, Denise’s attitude toward Larry had changed. She was bolder. She told Jeraldine: “Fuck him — I don’t care about what he thinks.” She said she wished Larry would find a woman and get on with his life.

    Detectives questioned John DeBoer, Denise’s lover, at length, and he was told he was a suspect in the murder. A former New Jersey police officer who was married with children, DeBoer told police that he had been seeing Denise for about six to eight weeks. During that time, DeBoer said, Denise had spoken at length about Larry and their marriage, how they once had a lot of good times but had grown apart. She told him she wanted a divorce from Larry, that she hadn’t loved him in years. She told him Larry lived across the street, which is why she always wanted DeBoer to come in the back door and park his car on Wenzlick. She told him that at times Larry had a violent temper and that he had once pointed a gun at her head.

    The night Denise died, DeBoer said, he got off work at 1:30 a.m., left a note — the latest of three he’d written her that evening — on her car and went home. He said he woke his wife, spoke to her around 4 a.m. and didn’t leave home after that — which his wife later confirmed. He was asked to take a polygraph, which police later told him he failed. DeBoer was surprised. DeBoer, who says he was upset and scared when he took the test, said he was telling the truth, and he denied killing Denise.

    Days later, DeBoer spoke to police again. He said he remembered another conversation with Denise, about a month earlier, in which she told him Larry had found her new birth-control pills. He was angry, she had said, and accused her of having an affair. DeBoer said Denise told him that she fabricated an explanation, claiming her doctor prescribed them to regulate her period. For about a week afterward, DeBoer said, Larry drove Denise to and from work.

    Through the early days of the investigation, Denise’s family, for the most part, stood by Larry. Denise’s mother and sisters were reluctant to say anything that might implicate him. They wanted to give Larry the benefit of the doubt.

    Over time, that would change.


    For police detectives trying to solve a homicide, time is often the enemy. The more time passes, the less likely it becomes that a murder case will ever be solved. In the case of Denise Wolff, police had no murder weapon. They were unable to find the van seen driving away from the crime scene. If there were any eyewitnesses to the crime, none had come forward.

    But such a violent shooting was an uncommon occurrence in the neighborhood near Lindenwood Park, and it was an area where many police officers lived with their own families. Numerous detectives canvassed and re-canvassed the area, searching for witnesses and hoping for a break. Detectives Ralph Campbell and Timothy Kaelin were among them.

    It was Sunday, July 20, 1997, three days after the murder. As Campbell and Kaelin began a re-canvass of the neighborhood, two other detectives told them that they’d gotten information from a tipster who suggested that they talk to a woman who was known to walk her dog between 4 and 5 a.m. in the area of the murder.

    The two detectives went to the apartment building at 3934 Jamieson, and Campbell and Kaelin began knocking on doors. There was no answer at apartment 2-South, but they could hear dogs barking inside. As they were leaving the building, a woman walked out of that apartment. She identified herself as Laurie Lynn Chirco. She acknowledged that she had walked her dog the morning of the murder, around 4 a.m., but denied hearing any gunshots. She said she had no other information.

    The two detectives weren’t satisfied. They asked her to come downtown to the police station. Reluctantly, she agreed. Inside Interview Room No. 2 downtown, she told detectives that she woke up around 3:50 or 3:55 a.m. Her dog was standing at the front door, wanting to go outside. She put on some clothes, put a leash on her dog and walked out to the front of the apartment building. When she left, she noticed the time on the digital clock in her living room was 4:07 a.m. She estimated she was outside for 5 or 10 minutes, then came in, made a glass of tea, turned off her alarm clock — set to go off at 5 a.m. — and left her apartment at 7 a.m. to go to work. Her 13-year-old daughter, asleep in the apartment the entire night, told Chirco she heard the air conditioner making a popping sound during the early-morning hours. Chirco again insisted she never heard any gunshots or police sirens.

    The detectives didn’t believe her. In their reports, they wrote that she exhibited “non-verbal communication signs” indicating that she knew more. She told detectives she was worried about the safety of her daughter, that she didn’t want to get involved. They say they told her that her identity could remain anonymous, that she would be afforded protection if she was a witness. They showed her five photos, including pictures of Larry Wolff and John DeBoer. They said she scanned the photos and stared at Larry’s, shaking her head back and forth as a tear streamed from her eye.

    Then her story began to change, the detectives wrote in their reports. She told them she hadn’t been truthful and that on the morning of the murder, she had actually walked her dog south on Jamieson, on the east side, toward Bancroft, and when she was two buildings south of her own, she saw a man standing at the northeast corner of Bancroft and Jamieson. She thought he matched the description of the South Side Rapist, and the man — white male, stocky build, wearing a T-shirt and blue jeans — began walking east on Bancroft, in the direction of Denise Wolff’s house. Chirco said she then turned around and headed home, reaching her apartment around 4:20 a.m.

    She told the detectives she believed the man she saw was Larry Wolff.


    If Laurie Chirco’s statement seemed like a big break in the case, that break would turn out to be rather tenuous, and it wouldn’t last for long. Something happened between the two detectives and Chirco inside Interview Room No. 2 — though precisely what happened may forever remain in dispute. So instead of cooperating with police after that day at the station, she hired a lawyer and filed a complaint with the police department’s Internal Affairs division, alleging she’d been mistreated by the officers. She then went on KTVI-TV (Channel 2) — identified as “Mary,” with her face slightly out of focus — to describe the detectives’ behavior and to publicly disavow witnessing the murder. She said detectives told her she was “playing with the big boys now,” and that they’d given her name to the prime suspect. She said she had decided to go on TV in case something happened to her.

    At the time, Chirco was a 33-year-old nurse case manager for a hospice. She lived in an apartment with her daughter, and in January 1997 she had married Marcello Chirco, a Sicilian immigrant who worked as a meatcutter at Schnucks. They did not live together. Police noted that Marcello Chirco owned a gray GMC full-size van with a silver stripe and a red Ford Escort, in addition to a Chinese SKS rifle — similar to the gun used in the Denise Wolff shooting. Several witnesses reported seeing a gray van the morning of the murder, and a couple of others reported seeing a small red car. Marcello Chirco agreed to a search of his van, and he turned over his gun for tests, according to police reports. He was questioned by police — though it is unclear whether he was ever seriously considered as a suspect — and at least one witness viewed his van and said it was not the same one he saw driving away from Denise’s home the morning of her death.

    In depositions taken more than a year after the murder, Chirco said she told the officers who showed up at her apartment building that day in July that she had seen nothing. When they didn’t believe her, one stood in the doorway of the building and told her, she said, “We can do it the easy way or we can do it the hard way.” Though she said she voluntarily agreed to go to the station, once there she continued to tell them she had seen nothing and asked to leave “more than 30 times.” When she asked to go to the bathroom, Chirco said, one of them handcuffed her wrist to a table.

    About two hours after she arrived, the interview became more and more contentious, Chirco said. Campbell, she said, told her he was getting fed up with her and that “I was no better than the person who pulled the trigger. That this woman had suffered, and that I was a bitch.” She said he also remarked that he “wondered what my priest would think of me.”

    Campbell left the room and returned with pictures of a woman at the morgue. Chirco recalled: “He said, “Take a good look at that.’ He said her legs looked like Swiss cheese and the photographer didn’t do her justice….” Chirco described a variety of good cop/bad cop tactics used by the officers. Soon, she said, they brought in a series of photographs of men.

    “I looked at them,” Chirco said, “and said that the man, well, at first I didn’t say anything. Then Detective Campbell started slamming his fist on the table … saying that I nonverbally identified somebody in the photographs.” Eventually Chirco told them the man in the first photograph — Larry — “looked like someone” she saw on the corner that morning while she was out with her dog.

    She had asked to leave again, but the detective, Chirco said, told her that her husband was “in bed with another woman right at that time.” Throughout the interview, Chirco said, she was subjected to a barrage of verbal abuse. She said the detective, at one point, threatened to pick up her daughter and put her in foster care. She had mentioned a prior miscarriage, she said, and the detective told her she must have been having so much sex that she caused it herself. At one point, she was accused of “screwing” Wolff. Throughout the ordeal, she said, she was not allowed to leave or use the telephone. When she insisted that the most she saw was a man on the corner, they were not satisfied: “When I told them that was all I saw, and that is all I told them that I saw at the time, then as time went on, it got worse. The longer I was there, the worse it got.”

    Chirco also insinuated that something physical occurred in the interview room. She described how one detective insisted she take off her jewelry, her wedding band, her belt. She asked why. She asked for a female officer. She was told to take it off now, Chirco said:

    “Campbell says: “Look at how quick she can get that belt off. She is used to taking her belt off and taking her pants down.” He mocked the baby she miscarried, Chirco said, and told her “I didn’t deserve a child.”

    After Chirco agreed to give a taped statement, she was released. It was 11 hours after she had first been brought to the police station. She complained about her treatment to Mayor Clarence Harmon. She filed a complaint with Internal Affairs — though in February 1998, Chirco was notified by mail that her complaint had been ruled “not sustained.”

    In the days and weeks after being questioned by police, Chirco said, she was repeatedly contacted by various police officers, asking her to meet with them, asking for more information. One, she said, told her she was “hindering prosecution” — a felony punishable by 10 years and a $10,000 fine. Another stuck his card under her door, told her of a reward, apologized for what the other officers had done. One, she said, told her police could take away her child and turn the girl over to the state until she cooperated. Chirco refused.

    In September, Chirco said, she got a call from a sergeant. She told him she thought she had been followed in her car by someone she believed to be Larry Wolff. She said he told her police couldn’t offer her any help: “If you can’t help us, we can’t help you.” She hung up on him. And not long after the murder, she moved out of her apartment on Jamieson.


    As police pushed forward with their investigation, the family of Denise Wolff struggled to deal with their grief — without much success. And their feelings toward Larry began to change.

    Sandy didn’t want to point a finger at Larry in the early hours of the investigation. “For the first couple of days, we tried to act like, you know, somebody else did it, till we knew. You can’t jump to conclusions,” Sandy says. “But after a couple of days, we knew. Everything that come out of his mouth was a lie. First he said he was sleeping so sound he didn’t hear anything, when people three blocks away heard it. First he said his dogs didn’t bark, then he said the dogs did bark, and he went out to see the dogs. Then he told my niece, “I heard it, but I just lay there in bed.’ Then he told someone he was under a window air conditioner, but he has central air — the air conditioner is on his sun porch. He wasn’t sleeping out there; he was in his bedroom.”

    She began replaying scenes in her mind, the way Larry acted strangely at a fish fry Larry and Denise attended at Sandy’s house the week before Denise’s death, and how he told her he wished Denise would drop this “talk about a divorce.” She began thinking about the way Larry could be possessive — how he raised two dogs from pups and, Sandy says, chose to kill them rather than give them away when he and Denise were moving from one rental property to another. “Someone said, “Why don’t you give those dogs away?’” Sandy says. “And he said, “They’re my dogs, and no one is going to have them but me.’ He took them out and beat them with a crowbar and a hammer,” she says.

  • The Accidental Politician

    The mayor faced an important and unexpected decision as the career of one of St. Louis’ most powerful elected officials came crashing down in the fall of 1995. Virvus Jones, the controversial and outspoken city comptroller, had pleaded guilty to two charges of federal tax fraud, and his resignation from office was imminent. Political insiders, many pulling for their own candidates, anxiously wondered who’d get the nod from Mayor Freeman Bosley Jr.

    On Oct. 11, 1995, Bosley gave his answer. Instead of a high-profile, seasoned politician like Jones, the mayor chose his soft-spoken budget director, a person who had never run for public office or registered high on anybody’s list of possibilities. All of a sudden, quiet, behind-the-scenes, uncontroversial Darlene Green held one St. Louis’ most important political jobs.

    The response from everybody, not just the politically connected, was a resounding “Darlene who?”

    Days after the announcement, Green met U.S. Rep. Bill Clay, Missouri’s senior member of Congress and long a player in hometown politics. Clay chuckles as he recalls the conversation with the new comptroller: “I said, “Who are you? Where did you come from?’ Nobody had heard of her.”

    Green, then 39, was such a stranger to both public speaking and the spotlight that after a week on the campaign trail, trekking to ward meetings, churches and neighborhood gatherings, she lost her voice. She showed up at a scheduled radio show anyway, unable to croak out even a few words. “I was talking more than I ever had in my life,” she says.

    Name recognition is no longer the problem it once was for Green, who in 1996 became the first woman elected to the comptroller’s post and who handily won re-election to a full term in 1997. For five years, Green has served as the city’s chief fiscal officer, a role that includes serving on the powerful Board of Estimate and Apportionment, where she’s the only member who isn’t a candidate for mayor in 2001.

    As comptroller, Green has built a reputation as an effective public official who gets praise for the city’s consistent credit-rating upgrades and budget surpluses. She’s politically prudent and has refused to take sides in the hot mayor’s race that has incumbent Clarence Harmon fending off a well-financed challenge from Aldermanic President Francis Slay. That neutrality reflects her cautious approach, which kept her from controversy while opening her to gentle charges of sometimes being too invisible and, well, just plain too nice.

    Because she clearly hasn’t garnered the sort of attention or grabbed the headlines her predecessor did, some still ask, “Darlene who?” As one alderman puts it: “She is totally below the radar screen.”

    That’s fine with Green. “My job is not about attention-getting,” she says. “It’s about getting the job done on behalf of the taxpayers. That’s all the attention I need, and that’s really the bottom line.”


    Darlene Green’s imposing desk at City Hall is covered with carefully arranged stacks of official documents. Between the books arranged on the giant credenza behind her, she has displayed photographs of her meetings with celebrities: Here’s Darlene Green with President Bill Clinton. Here she is with singer Patti LaBelle, lawyer Johnnie Cochran and Olympian Jackie Joyner-Kersee. The opportunity to rub shoulders with the powerful and famous reflects a life Green says she never envisioned for herself while growing up poor in the Pruitt-Igoe public-housing complex on the city’s North Side, the eldest of six children in a single-parent home.

    Back then, Green was a quiet, obedient child who aspired to a better life. She watched her mother struggle to raise a family while holding down two jobs — working both as a housekeeper in Clayton and Ladue and as an aide at a nursing home — and it left a lasting impression.

    To this day, Green remains amazed at her mother’s ability to keep their three-bedroom apartment white-glove tidy, what with everything else on her plate: “We would wake up in the morning, and if you can just imagine this for a moment, I’m waking up and she’s telling me to get ready for school, and I’m washing my face, and by the time I turn around, all the beds are made. Everything is crisp; a hot meal is on the table. The whole house is immaculate, and there is not a dirty piece of laundry in the house. That’s the way my mother was. It would drive us kids crazy, but that’s the way she was, every day.”

    Although Pruitt-Igoe later achieved notoriety as a symbol of the nation’s public-housing failures (the complex was dynamited in 1976), Green says she remembers a different place, where kids played jumprope and hide-and-seek in the shadows of the high-rises and the neighbors knew your name and made sure you were home before dark. Her world was limited to the blocks surrounding her home, the places she could walk to, and return from, in time to be in by dark: “Until I was 11 or 12, I didn’t know anything past Grand Avenue. I knew there was the Fox Theatre, and nothing past that.”

    Her mother’s heavy workload also meant that Green, as the eldest, learned responsibility at an early age. She watched her younger siblings while her mother was at work, a role Green says was hard because younger brothers and sisters are often loath to take orders from an older one. “I always knew that my mother didn’t go to work for fun,” she says, “that it was because she needed to have income to raise a family. I remember having to talk to my brothers and sisters about when we didn’t have enough money, to make them understand: “Don’t cry because we don’t have this. Don’t cry because Mama isn’t here. I know you don’t want me to be your mama, but let me take your head, lie on my shoulder. I’ll try to make it better for you.’ I remember those kinds of things.”

    As she relates the experience, Green’s composure suddenly gives way to tears. She apologizes as she grabs a tissue. “I apologize — I hadn’t thought about this in so long,” she says. “I never did this before.”

    Green was just a young child herself as she struggled with her leadership role. “I remember climbing on the shelf to get the sugar to make Kool-Aid, I was that little,” she says. “But they were littler than me, so, you know, that’s what I had to do, and it was OK — because when you are in a family, at least for me, that was my responsibility. I always remember that, being that I was the older one, doing the right thing. It was what my mother expected, and that’s how I was raised.”


    Barry Leibman, co-owner of Left Bank Books, remembers Green when she was a teenager attending Vashon High School. Back then, he taught at a program called Sophia House, a former residence at 23rd and Hebert streets that had been converted into school and study rooms for an after-school program started by the Jesuits at St. Louis University for boys from the city’s North Side. Four nights a week, for three hours each night, Green would show up to study, do her homework, receive lessons on such things as language skills and vocabulary-building. Leibman says the program drew high achievers and had a successful rate of placing students in the most competitive universities, including Harvard. It also sought to instill in the teens a sense of community service. “We did not want the students to just get an education and get out of the community,” Leibman says. “We wanted them to get an education and come back to help.”

    He recalls Green vividly: “She was very smart, very self-assured even at that age and very sweet, which, as a teenager, translates into an adult as a kind person, which she is. She kind of exhibited a lot of the really strong qualities that she exhibits as an adult.”

    One of the counselors at Sophia House was Virvus Jones. “It started out as an all-male prep that served kids who lived in the old Pruitt-Igoe project, and she was one of the first women to break the sex barrier. She had a quiet determination,” Jones says. “We had some people who expressed their confidence level a lot louder than Darlene — she was always kind of the quiet, soft-spoken person she is now, but very determined. She was very dedicated to getting and making a better life for herself.”

    Green says she treasured the time spent studying at Sophia House; because her siblings were now older, she could afford to sneak away the time for herself. “It was one of the first places girls could go,” she says, “I’d go home, do my chores, and then it was, like, “Can I go, can I go?’ And I went. One of my best girlfriends and I would go, and I would really study, believe it or not — that was fun to us,” she says.

    When it came time to choose a college, Green, who’d toured schools on the East Coast and attended a summer program at Phillips Academy in Andover, Mass., applied to Washington University and Boston University. She was accepted at both schools. She was headed for Boston. But her cautious nature led to some last-minute worries. Although she had a scholarship package including tuition and room and board, Green didn’t have the money to get to Boston, and even if she did, how would she ever afford to return home for visits? She wrote to Wash. U. officials, asking whether she could get financial aid to live on campus, and they said yes. She stayed in St. Louis.

    “Sometimes I have second thoughts and wish I had left, because it is good to have experiences outside your hometown,” she says. But she could live on campus, away from home, and Green says she figured she could manage better there. She majored in business administration with an eye toward working in the accounting field, and she had her first full-time job before she graduated, when an internship at Brown Shoe in Clayton turned into an offer of permanent full-time employment. She finished her studies at night and graduated in 1978.

    Green worked at Brown Shoe for three years, then did a stint as an auditor for the Missouri Public Service Commission in Jefferson City and, for five years, worked as an assistant comptroller at Columbia College in Columbia, Mo. In the mid-’80s, as her five-year marriage was ending (she declines to talk about her ex-husband), she returned to St. Louis and took a job working for the May Co., handling accounting for its shopping-centers division. Back in St. Louis, she ran into Freeman Bosley Jr., whom she had known in high school, though not well. He had been friends with her cousin and her ex-husband. In 1986, Bosley, then the city clerk, offered her a job as financial manager in his office. She accepted. After Bosley was elected mayor, Green followed him to City Hall, taking the job of budget director in 1993.


    If not for an unusual string of events, including a chance meeting at a wake, Green would not be comptroller today. Back in September 1995, Green got a call at home on a Sunday afternoon from Bosley’s secretary. The mayor wanted to meet with Green the next morning. She had no idea why: “He had never done that before, so I was, like, “What did I do?’ I contemplated the whole day what was wrong.” That evening, she read about Virvus Jones’ troubles in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch and figured Bosley might need her to do some work related to that. She wasn’t prepared for what happened at their meeting, when he began talking about making her the city’s next comptroller.

    Green says she was stunned, and as she listened politely, she quickly made up her mind to turn him down: “I sat back and relaxed, because I was, like, “No way!’ I was listening to him, being courteous, but when we finished the conversation, I said, “No, thank you, I can’t do this.’” She remembers the two of them exchanging puzzled grins as the meeting ended. “I figured he was thinking, “I just wasted my time.’ And I was thinking, “Yes, you did.’”

    That might have been the end of it. But the next day, as Green was attending a wake, she ran into Jackie Brock, an ordained minister and evangelist and wife of Cardinals star Lou Brock, whom Green had met before on social occasions. Brock motioned to her from across the room, then told Green she had been on her mind all day. A small television set in the funeral home was running a story on Jones’ problems, and Brock told Green: “You’re going to have his job.” She reached out for Green’s hands and asked Green to pray with her.

    The encounter so shook Green that she figured she had made a terrible mistake in declining Bosley’s offer. “I thought there was no way she could have known about this meeting I just had,” she says. “It was on my mind, but there is no way she could have known.” Green, a member of Antioch Baptist Church who considers herself a spiritual person, took the conversation as a sign. “If you are a spiritual person, you don’t want to miss your opportunity,” she says. “You want to be in the right place. That’s how I was feeling.” She called Bosley that night and told him she had changed her mind. But it was more than a month before he made his decision. Green says she had “goosebumps and rumblings in my stomach and was nervous for a good 30 days.” In early October, it became official: Green would be the next comptroller.

    At the time, speculation about who would get the nod centered on Circuit Clerk Mavis Thompson and Leslie F. Bond Jr., a lawyer and former head of the city election board. Bosley had made it clear that his choice would be an African-American, and Green’s name surfaced as a possible compromise candidate.

    Bosley says Green had done a good job for him in the clerk’s office, particularly in her handling of negative audits from state Auditor Margaret Kelly, who questioned what had happened to more than $1 million in funds from civil cases between 1986 and 1989. By 1993, Kelly said most of the problems had been corrected. Bosley says Green also performed well as budget director, submitting well-planned, detailed budgets.

    “In these types of situations, you try to get two things out of every decision,” he says, “a good administrative decision and a good political decision. When I started thinking about potential candidates, the politics had to give way to the administrative.”

    “She had no politics,” Bosley adds. “She was a political neophyte. But I knew no one could question my decision. She’s quiet and reserved, but she’s confident. And I don’t care what happens or what anyone says, but she knows finance and she knows money. She moves quietly and methodically and gets the job done.”


    Moving into such a public role was initially a stretch for the private Green, who had long felt comfortable in behind-the-scenes roles. “It is the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” she says. She viewed becoming a public official as a second job and sought out advice from other politicians. She methodically practiced her public speaking, read books, remembered old skills from a stint in a Toastmasters club, practiced in front of friends, learned that the cure for laryngitis involves cold liquids, not hot ones.

    “People who know me say there was a definite evolution from the time I first began until now,” Green says. “But I knew how to do hard work. There’s nothing wrong with hard work, and having a mother like I had, how could I not work hard?”

    During her first campaign, supporters initially worried that the public might view her as too nice or too timid.

    Darlene Davis, an accountant with TLC Next Generation who worked as deputy treasurer on both of Green’s campaigns, remembers those early campaign meetings, where some supporters pushed to “almost redefine her character” in an effort to address the niceness issue — and urged her to hire an image consultant: “Everyone was saying you have to do this and do that. Everyone was bombarding her with stuff like that and saying she needed to hire an image consultant.” Davis says Green politely refused. “She said, “I’m me; this is who I am and this is who I am going to be,” Davis recalls. “Forget all of the fluff — this is who she is. When voters see her and come to the conclusion that she is soft-spoken, it is because that is who she is, but she is extremely effective.”

    Davis says Green’s strongest trait is her consistency: “Over all the years I’ve known her, regardless of what position she is in, she is consistent. She has that sort of quiet, unassuming personality, but when it comes down to work having to be done, tough decisions having to be made, you might think she would be a pushover, but she knows her stuff. When it is time to be aggressive, she is aggressive to the point that she gets her point across and gets results accomplished, but in the end you are still left saying she is a humble, unassuming-type person. She doesn’t ruffle a whole lot of feathers, but she is effective.”

    But it hasn’t all been smooth sailing for Green. Early in her term, there were a couple of highly publicized blunders. In 1996, for instance, the Post-Dispatch reported that three felons were among the hosts of a campaign fundraiser in Kansas City; Green said she was unaware of their records. And in 1997, the Post-Dispatch sued to obtain the cell-phone records of eight current or former members of Bosley’s administration after Green refused to release the records. Those records, the Post-Dispatch reported, showed more than 11 hours’ worth of calls from Green’s two cell phones to her campaign staff. Green later reimbursed the city for the calls.

    But since then, Green’s tenure has, for the most part, been devoid of controversy or scandal. One alderman notes that with Bosley’s mayoral defeat in 1997, the departure of her benefactor has freed Green to be an independent voice in city government.

    She has taken on a prominent role in several key issues, including the future of the Kiel Opera House. Back in 1996, the Board of Aldermen directed Green to enforce the lease held by Kiel Partners — a group of mostly Civic Progress companies that raised money to build the new Kiel Center — and force the group to complete renovation of the Opera House. Green decided against suing Kiel Partners, which maintained that it had met its obligation by spending $2.5 million on the Opera House. She then appointed a task force to offer ideas on how Kiel could be restored; it recommended turning the building into a museum.

    Ed Golterman, founder of Kiel for Performing Arts Inc., an organization with the goal of reopening Kiel as a performing-arts venue, complains that Green’s task force included individuals affiliated with Grand Center Inc., which sees the Opera House as a potential threat to the Fox. “If you looked at the committee, it was pretty much stacked against reopening the Opera House as a theater,” he says. But even Golterman, who has since left the Kiel group, won’t pointedly fault Green: “I think her office consistently — let’s say the administration — consistently has ignored the economic and cultural value of Kiel Opera House and has absolutely melted to the pressure of Civic Progress lawyers.” He does say that Green’s office has seemed overly picky when proposals have come forward: “They seem to require an absolute perfect deal with all the money on the table.”

    Green says she decided not to sue the Kiel Partners because the city counselor’s office and lawyers with the St. Louis Development Corp. gave conflicting opinions on the city’s legal position: “I didn’t feel like I had strong legal backing, and I didn’t want to waste taxpayers’ money in court. I felt I could be more effective in bringing in community involvement to come up with a solution rather than going to court and spending money.”

    At one point, Green rejected a proposal from real-estate investor Sam Glasser, who had offered $1 million for the opera house. She says she would rather see the Opera House kept in a mothballed state until someone comes forward with enough money to ensure its restoration. Maintenance was required under the lease terms with Kiel Partners, and under the partnership’s successors, Bill and Nancy Laurie, who last year purchased Kiel Center and the hockey Blues. Green believes that ultimately, Kiel Opera House could be reopened as a blues and jazz museum but also as a performance venue.

    James Heidenry, treasurer of Kiel for Performing Arts, believes Green could have done more to see the opera house reopened. At the same time, he says, he is unwilling to criticize her: “I think what she’s trying to do is be very conservative and careful with the assets of the city, and I applaud her for it.”


    Green’s style in office has been a marked departure from that of her predecessor, who describes his own political style as more confrontational and contentious. Still, Virvus Jones gives Green a “pretty good grade.

    “What I think the comptroller is supposed to do is to ensure that the city’s accounts are being managed in accordance with the law, and I think she’s done a pretty good job. The city’s credit rating has consistently moved forward … which has reduced the cost of the city to borrow money.” Jones credits Green with striving to maintain her independence, citing her decision to resign from the board of ConnectCare in 1997 because she felt it conflicted with her watchdog role as the city’s chief fiscal officer.

    “I think sometimes people misinterpret her quietness and demeanor and may think she’s too soft on issues, and that may have to do with following me as comptroller. She probably has less vinegar in her blood,” Jones says. “People used to describe me as pretty cantankerous, contentious, but I had a different way of expressing my disagreement on issues than Darlene does.” She has developed a reputation as someone “who doesn’t get involved in public confrontations as much.”

    Green is also dealing with a different atmosphere than he did, Jones says, because he was the first African-American to serve as comptroller since John Bass lost his re-election bid in 1977 after serving a single term as comptroller. Jones was appointed to the position by former Mayor Vincent Schoemehl, and for a while, he was the only black on the Board of Estimation and Apportionment. Jones says that’s not an issue today, with Harmon and Green both on the board. And he says his battles may have paved the way for Green in some respects. He says he strived to improve the visibility of the office on the advice of former Comptroller and Mayor John Poelker, who felt the comptroller’s position “had lost stature in terms of being the fiscal watchdog of the city and had become a rubber stamp of the mayor’s office.”

    “What I set out to do, per Poelker’s advice and counsel, was to restore the confidence level,” Jones says. “By the time Darlene got there, a lot of that fight had been fought, with her help, too, as budget director.”

    Although Green is not considered as outspoken as Jones once was, she is not silent, either. In 1998, the mayor proposed a $113 million bond-issue package and property-tax increase to pay for improvements to the police and fire departments. Green went on record as saying the proposal was “bloated and simply too big” and withdrew her support from the plan. The mayor responded by scaling back the proposal to $65 million.

    Earlier this year, Green voiced her disapproval after Harmon attempted to award a potentially lucrative contract to handle a lawsuit by the city against the lead-paint industry to the John Frank law firm, a contributor to Harmon’s re-election campaign, without first seeking the approval of the E&A board.

    When the contract landed on her desk, Green called the mayor’s office to let him know she would not be signing it. “My office found the process had been skirted,” she says. “I sent it back, said, “Can’t do it,’ and they began the proper process.”

    The matter generated a great deal of controversy because Frank’s firm was criticized by Francis Slay as being less qualified than a competing law firm, which was rejected for the job by five-member city selection committee comprising representatives of Slay, Harmon and Green, plus two members of the city counselor’s office. The committee chose Frank’s firm, which proposed handling the suit for a 25 percent contingency fee, even though the rival law firm proposed charging just 18 percent if the case went to trial and 15 percent if the suit was settled beforehand. The committee did reduce the fee to Frank’s firm to 20 percent.

    At an E&A meeting in February, political wrangling continued between Harmon and Slay as Slay repeatedly spoke out about a less qualified firm’s being awarded the contract for a higher fee and proposed slashing the fee to 18/15 percent. Throughout the verbal sparring by Slay and Harmon, Green stayed silent. But when time came for a vote, she noted that she, too, had concerns that Frank’s firm was less qualified but, in the interest of expediency and in the interest of speeding up the likelihood of relief for lead-poisoned children, would approve the contract but with the reduced fee.

    She has made her opinion known on issues outside the E&A board as well. Green showed up last month as a crowd chanted outside the Schnucks store at Natural Bridge Avenue and Union Boulevard to protest the closing of two groceries in the city.

    “I thought it was important to go and important for the neighborhood people to let Schnucks know they were disappointed in how the store closings were handled, and also I felt they possibly were holding the neighborhood hostage by not only moving but planning not to allow the leases to be used by anyone else,” Green says.


    You have to stretch to find Green’s critics. One of the few people who has anything negative to say about Green is Z. Dwight Billingsly, a deputy comptroller under Jones who ran unsuccessfully against Green in 1997.

    “She hasn’t really done anything,” says Billingsly, a radio-talk-show host who is the Republican nominee in the race to represent for the 1st Congressional District. “Most of the things she takes credit for were things we put in — the city’s credit-rating upgrades were the result of Virvus Jones and Freeman Bosley passing two sales taxes. I believe the comptroller should be very outspoken with downtown revitalization, and you haven’t heard a word from her on that. And a taxpayer-financed stadium would be a project that would be absolutely stealing from the taxpayers, and I haven’t heard the comptroller say one word about taking tax revenue away from the city and giving it to sports-team owners.”

    Not so, says Green. Although she hasn’t staged a press conference on the steps of City Hall, Green says she let the stadium owners know early on she would not go for any plan that would involve diverting existing tax revenue generated by the stadium to building a new stadium. She will, however, consider earmarking any additional tax revenue for a new stadium if team owners can demonstrate that a new stadium would generate substantially more tax dollars.

    Another of her former election opponents has a different take on Green. Ald. James Shrewsbury (D-16th), who ran unsuccessfully against Green in 1996, says she’s done a “fairly good job.

    “She’s done two things I said I would do if elected comptroller. She’s doing more business with St. Louis firms than her predecessors did, so there are more dollars staying here. The number of complaints that aldermen and other elected officials receive about nonpayment of bills have dropped. Under Virvus Jones, a lot of suppliers were not getting paid. That problem seems to have subsided. There’s been very little in her performance that someone could criticize.”

    Ald. Lyda Krewson (D-28th), a certified public accountant who was considered by some to be a possible challenger to Green next year, says she has no interest in being comptroller and believes Green is doing fine. “It seems to me like she is always looking out to protect the assets of the citizens of St. Louis,” Krewson says. “She’s looked out for the credit rating and has protected it, and that is to her credit.” By its nature, Krewson says, the comptroller’s job is unlikely to generate much attention — unless something goes wrong: “Not many of us sit around talking about how great our accountant is unless they screw it up, and no one talks about how great our tax return is until they goof it up.”

    Green agrees that much of what she does, if she does it well, isn’t headline fodder. “I’m results-oriented. If there are issues that involve tax dollars, whether there is a savings, I go after that….” she says. “I’m the one who is going to be looking out for (taxpayers’) interest when it comes to building a stadium or a hotel.”

    As an example, Green notes that in 1998, the city’s letter of credit for the bonds on the convention-center project came up for renewal. Rather than renew the letter of credit, Green says, she wanted to check to see whether the city could instead qualify for insurance on those bonds. Because of its improved credit rating, the city did qualify for insurance, freeing up $15 million. Green agreed to allow part of that money, $5 million, to be used for remediation of the convention-center-hotel site.

    Green says she has insisted that developers stick to an original agreement to return $5 million to the city when the deal closes later this month — an amount she has earmarked for the ConnectCare program. And she has let Historic Restoration Inc. know that she will require a specific condition before the sale of the city-owned convention-center-hotel property, slated to close on Oct. 31. If the developer later sells the hotel to a new owner, she wants the city to see a $16 million slice of the profit. HRI is balking, but Green says she’ll stick to her guns: “I’ve said this is a deal-breaker. I’m not going to give up.”


    Right now, Green’s only ambition is to win reelection, and unlike the mayor, she’s drawn no major opponent. Harmon says it seems unlikely that she will. “What would they say? What were they going to market themselves as? I think she’s got a good record, and it’s going to be hard for anyone to stake some claim to the contrary,” Harmon says.

    Aldermanic President Francis Slay says Green has “assembled a great staff, and that’s to her credit. She and her staff have done a very good job on any financing matter.

    “I wouldn’t call her low-key,” he adds. “She lets you know her opinion and she’s not afraid to disagree, but at the same time she conducts herself in a professional manner and gets her point across without being unduly confrontational.”

    Some say Green ought to set her sights higher than just the comptroller’s office. Her political benefactor, Freeman Bosley Jr., is one of them: “I see her as a great candidate for statewide office one day.”

    Another is James Richardson, whose picture occupies a prominent place — not far from Bill Clinton’s — on Green’s office credenza. Richardson was Green’s high-school counselor at Vashon and a man Green credits with urging her on to college.

    Though he’s since retired to Massachusetts, Richardson keeps an eye on the St. Louis political scene through his subscription to the St. Louis American. His voice crackles with pride as he talks about Green, the quiet, serious student he counseled d

  • Anatomy of Desire

    She’s not unlike anyone working in the cubicle next to yours. She may be a data-entry person (which she is). Attractive, middle-aged, divorced (which she is as well) — you can imagine the details of her appearance any way you like: blonde, brunette, redhead. Shapely, plump, stout, thin — she won’t be described with specific details, because the risks to the life she has imaginatively, and determinedly, created are too great. Her family doesn’t know; her son doesn’t know. If her identity were revealed in these pages, she’d lose everything — that life she has constructed is delicately secured. So imagine her as you will — her business is fantasy, after all — but don’t make of her someone extreme, the mental picture that comes with the word “dominatrix.” She’s not who you would expect (“I’m not Elvira,” she says), just as the corporate CEO, the lawyer, the former NFL star sporting the Super Bowl ring — some of her clientele — are not the people you would expect to be into bondage, cross-dressing. You would not expect them to be the sort who would ask — no, beg — to be whipped, to be verbally humiliated, to be spanked, and then head home to their wives and children, feeling restored.

    Think of her, at least superficially, as a typical Midwesterner. She was born and educated in the city, raised in a large Catholic family, but don’t make any assumptions about abusive priests or sadistic nuns, or some perverse childhood interpretation of the wine and the chalice, the robes and the incense. She wasn’t that kind of Catholic girl. “Why do people want different things?” she asks, rhetorically. “Some can say, ‘Back in childhood such-and-such happened.’ There is nothing in childhood I could look at and say, ‘This is why I enjoy being in control so much.’”

    Adolescence, as with most people, was a time of exploration. The adolescent quest for meaning or significance shows itself outwardly in clothes, fads. A profile of youth culture in St. Louis in the late ’70s would include the fading-out of disco, the first punkers and hip kids catching the new wave. The more intimate discoveries aren’t so easily stereotyped.

    Her boyfriend was open to exploring different fetishes, she says: “We played with areas of bondage, sensuality, role-playing.” But, as with most people, those teenage years of adventure and daring became a memory. She grew into adulthood and did what adults do: married in her early 20s, gave birth to a son, lived a family life. “The marriage was completely vanilla,” she says, and adds, “and vanilla is good, too. Everything was fine; the marriage went its course. My desire for fetish didn’t have anything to do with my divorce.”

    With the dissolution of her marriage, once the pain subsided, she realized new possibilities, a world beyond the boundaries marriage had imposed. She remembered happier days, more free-spirited days, and those teenage forays into kink: “When I was married, and that wasn’t available, I didn’t actually miss it, but once marriage was over … ”

    Once marriage was over, about five years ago, she checked out the Internet. The desire for control — or, more crucially, the pleasure of control, which she had experienced since childhood — she found on the kinkier filaments of the Web.

    If people with fantasies for handcuffs and butt plugs, for wooden canes and leather paddles, for playing the role of slave or master — if they found themselves isolated and assumed themselves alone, abnormal, deviant in the seemingly kinkless Midwest, the Internet revolution was their invitation to reach out and flog someone, and right here in River City.

    She began discovering information, the kind of information she didn’t know existed. She uncovered a local chapter of a national organization, People Exchanging Power (PEP), a group that meets monthly at a hotel near I-270 for informal discussions. Coaxing herself to attend her first meeting was difficult, she says: “I didn’t have any idea what to expect. When I got there, I realized they were very friendly people, welcoming me.”

    There were about a dozen participants, mostly men. “Women tend to come with other men,” she says, “or they don’t come at all.” One couple led the group discussions. It could have been any civic organization gathering to share ideas about pertinent issues, drinking sodas, munching on vegetables and dip, wearing name tags — “Hi, my name is ….” For her, the surface banality of it all provided a jolt of recognition: “I wasn’t as abnormal as I thought I was.”

    She was understandably shy at her first PEP meeting (or ” PEP rally,” she jokes, “black-and-blue pompons”): “The first time, I just sat and didn’t talk about anything.” Books were discussed, some how-to info was provided — imagine a Tupperware party, except the fetish material of choice is leather rather than plastic.

    “As I got to know some of those people better, I was introduced to more private groups,” she recalls. People who met at PEP splintered into groups “to have more play, to have something more than a book club.” You can’t develop dexterity with a whip by reading a manual, she says. And then these groups became couples. “That’s where community starts,” she observes, “a community of like minds.”

    “Community” is a word that’s often used, but rarely with precision. She believes there is a BDSM (bondage/domination/ sadism/masochism) community in St. Louis: “We don’t have enough people into BDSM for a Yellow Pages. We don’t have restaurants. We don’t have our own bars. A jazz lover can go to a jazz club. I don’t see Fetish Night at the Galaxy as being an accurate view of the average BDSM participant.

    “Yet without those things, there are social groups, educating groups, play groups — people who have gotten to know each other, who have scenes with each other.” Perhaps the strongest bond they share is that, when they’re together, “we don’t have to live with this giant secret.”

    A noticeable change comes over people who have found something wholly their own, when a self that’s been locked away is released. You see it in people who have experienced religious conversion or spiritual illumination, people whose sexual identity has heretofore been closeted — you see in such people a new self, a self liberated through its own recognition. You see them newly confident, radiantly so.

    She realized that her desire for control could not only be fulfilled but that she had an instinct for domination. She was good at it — submissives she played with told her so. She felt she was good at it. “I can throw a single-tail whip with the best of them,” she brags, “but I can get the same effect by whispering in their ear at just the right time.”

    She began to explore the possibility of becoming a professional dominatrix, or “prodom” for short. A prodom who was involved in the local BDSM scene even before there was a scene “took me under her wing. We talked a lot. She recommended books, and she started including me in a few of her sessions, first letting me watch and then letting me participate.” She took on a moniker of her own — let’s call her Mistress Kali, because many prodoms take the name of “Mistress” or “Goddess” connected to a powerful female name, sometimes with a reference to myth. Mistress Kali’s tutor we’ll call Lady M.

    Lady M, Kali says, is recognized as a pioneer of the local scene: “She takes people into her life like members of a family. She makes friends and keeps them for years. She’s one of the most generous people I’ve ever met.

    “She’s one of the first women allowed in the gay men’s leather scene. She was the first one.” Mistress Kali says there has been a history of segregation between different outsider groups, between gays and straights, women and men. “Lady M allowed for different groups to cross.”

    Lady M also devoted herself, her knowledge and her body, to Mistress Kali for the novice’s tutelage. “Because Lady M’s been on both sides,” both submissive and dominant, Kali says, “she was able to tell me what the experience is like from both sides. I was able to practice on her. What I learned about myself was that I can push my own boundaries. The first time I ever threw a flogger on somebody’s shoulder, I thought I couldn’t possibly do this, but he responded with such happiness and such eagerness. The more I did it, the more he liked it.”

    Mistress Kali began to take on clients of her own, which meant gradually acquiring pieces of equipment and, just as important, costumes. “I love putting on a corset,” she says, “thigh-high boots. It’s different from my normal life. I love the feel of leather. It’s a powerful feeling.” She loves shoes with 6-inch heels, loves shoes in general. “I’ve been into shoes since puberty,” she confesses, and she has at least 75 pairs tucked away in closets — not quite Imelda status but still a significant personal inventory.

    The timing of her entry into the profession proved fortuitous. She quickly tired of hauling her various apparatus and costumes to motel rooms. Then Lady M chose to go into semiretirement and sold Mistress Kali her “dungeon” for a flat fee. “My dungeon is a renovated loft downtown — very quiet, very clean, very subtle. No one’s in there except my clients and me.”

    The décor of a dungeon is as individual as the people who use it. Kali figures there are about five prodoms with dungeons working regularly in St. Louis. She knows of at least 10 private dungeons: “For some people, it’s just putting hooks on the wall; for some, it’s getting a spanking bench. Some people have full setups in their basements.”

    What goes on in those spaces is as full of variety as the human imagination can contain. The St. Louis scene motto, one promoted by the BDSM group Leather and Lace, one that appears in Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission (a kind of primer for the novice), sets the requirements of “safe, sane, consensual.”

    “If you don’t have all three things, you shouldn’t be playing,” says Mistress Kali. “All scenes are negotiated beforehand. Limits and guidelines are discussed. ‘Safe’ words are established — words a submissive can use to stop a scene at any time.” For example, a word such as “stop” or “don’t” might actually serve to intensify a scene, so words outside the context of torture are employed.

    “As you explore this loving exchange,” she notes, “you start to learn their needs, their reactions, to the point you don’t even need a safe word anymore.”

    A phrase often voiced in the BDSM community is “It’s about pleasure, not pain,” but Mistress Kali finds this to be more jargon than real observation. “For some people, pain is pleasure. Everyone has a different fantasy, and motivations are all different. I’ve seen people who are true masochists, who can take an extraordinary amount of pain — and moan with pain — but they may not understand verbal humiliation at all. A person who wants to worship a woman’s feet cannot understand why anyone else would want to be tied up.

    “BDSM is not always about sex,” she adds. “It’s about fetish. It’s about fulfillment. It’s about pleasure.”

    And it’s about transformation and release, Kali says: “I see that in my work. I see that in people who walk in — lawyers in three-piece suits who have been in high-pressure, high-powered jobs, all they want is an hour of escape. They don’t want to make a decision for the next hour — that is relaxation, that is a vacation. I see people who want to be cross-dressed, who feel like a different person, who feel comfortable and natural, who have women’s names, who have fantasized about that — and that’s where they’re comfortable.

    “For most people, it’s a way of expressing themselves. It’s a huge relief. Most of my male clients who are happily married men, they just have to have a void filled in life. They feel they can’t go to their wife, or they’ve brought it up in subtle ways and been rejected.” Or they don’t want these interactions with their spouse, don’t want this to be part of their everyday intimacies.

    A reciprocal relationship exists between dominant and submissive. She wants control; he wants no responsibilities. She wants to rule; he wants to surrender. There are submissives who so desire to escape the pressures of adulthood that their dominants diaper them like infants.

    Mistress Kali doesn’t involve herself in infantilism, but she participates in the stripping away of a personality, then aids in reconstructing that veneer before the client heads out the door: “It’s funny, because it’s tiring but exhilarating, too. I put out a lot of emotional energy, as does my client, or anyone. It’s a lot of intense communicating between two people.”

    When the session is over, she says, there “should be a cooling-down session, just reconnecting.” After an especially profound scene, where role-playing has “taken them completely away from who they are, I slowly bring them back to, say, Eddie Silva, writer, making contact physically, and send them out the door.”

    She talks about these forms of intimacy with great candor, sitting in a St. Louis Bread Co. as others come and go from their tables, talking about other things. There’s the impression she’s testing how explicit she can be — the interview process its own exploration of boundaries between two people. She offers an invitation to explore her dungeon at a later date. Then, after talking about everyday matters, the various positives and negatives of a writer’s vocation, she asks, “Do you ever wish someone would just tell you what to do so you didn’t have to make so many choices?

    “That’s what all of my clients want.”

    The people directing the downtown-loft-restoration boom don’t have this sort of space in mind.

    In a building in the heart of the city, up the elevator and down an empty corridor, Kali unlocks the door to her dungeon. She’s been in ahead of time, arranging the setting for full effect, lighting white candles on two black-iron candelabra. Just as she has described it, the wide room is subtle, clean and spare, yet at the same time warm. The lighting is soft, full of shadows. The most remarkable object in the room is a wooden throne, covered with symmetrically patterned spikes. The sharp points are actually pencil stubs, she reveals, pulling one out of its hole — 1,200 pencils altogether. The throne is custom-built — as is most of her equipment — the design “based on a torture chair I found in a medieval book. It’s functional, but I don’t use it. It’s a piece of art.”

    The walls are exposed brick; ventilation pipes are visible on the ceiling. The floor is carpeted in a thick brown weave. The stereo is tuned to Classic 99.

    There’s an antique wooden altar, engraved with the words “In Remembrance of Me.” There are a couple of framed prints: one with a white-faced, masked figure, the word “Reality” written beneath the image; the other, a print labeled “Bizarre No. 10,” features a woman with orange-red hair, gagged, a look of fear or anticipation — or both — on her face.

    Across one wall is a row of long, thin mirrors, and shards of mirror. A firm leather chair with a slender back sits alone in the room. The St. Andrew’s cross hasn’t been set up yet. Hanging from the ceiling is an ominous metal hook to a 1-ton hoist.

    Mistress Kali sits on the bondage table, a solidly constructed piece of custom-built furniture, specially designed to hold an array of binding equipment — handcuffs, ropes.

    Wooden stocks, strangely appealing in a purely aesthetic sense, stolidly take up one part of the room. There’s a spanking bench. Tools of the trade hang from a wall — paddles, whips, canes, clothespins, clamps, a German gas mask, something that looks like salad tongs.

    In one corner of the dungeon is a dog cage, with a cushion on top where a person can sit.

    “Bad dogs go in there,” she notes.

    “This reflects me,” she says of her private workspace/playpen. “I’m comfortable in this room. I don’t want fake stones painted on the walls. It’s just what I’m comfortable with.” Regarding the warmth of the space, she says, “It’s been my experience that there are a lot of prodoms who feel they need to be mean and cold to be effective. I don’t believe that. Maybe that is reflected in the environment.”

    Sitting beside her on the bondage table is a white box, opened to reveal five metal objects, each tapered to a sharp point. These are talons that fit onto the fingers and thumb, made of hammered nickel.

    “One of the things I like is the tactile sense,” she says, slipping the talons on her fingers. “Imagine being blindfolded and feeling this on your bare back,” the warmth of the flesh of her hand and then the cold, threatening metal. “I have a lot of toys, very tactile things.” She says she first saw talons in use at a private play party. She got the phone number of the novelty store in New York where they came from and called immediately: “Send me some of those. I must have them!” She laughs at her mock exuberance.

    A criticism of BDSM culture — other than the standard judgment that its participants are just sick — is that these are pathetic people, so desensitized that they need to go to extremes to experience any sensation. Yet as Mistress Kali describes the “tactile sense” she explores, there’s the impression of a sensualist attuned to the illogical pleasures of the body. She handles a paddle — leather on one side, fur on the other — and describes how she’ll spank a bare bottom until it’s pink and highly sensate, then rub the fur across it.

    “Clothespins are one of the basics of SM,” she says, “on genitals or nipples or anywhere on the skin.” Lock a clothespin on flesh, leave it for some time and then remove it — the blood rushes back, she says, “and it really hurts.”

    She talks about the cross-dressers, whom she adores: “For the most part they haven’t shared this with anyone, their desire to do this. I find two main reasons that men want to dress as women: It feels good to wear silk panties; also, humiliation — to be treated as a bad girl, as a slut.

    “The cross-dresser who wants to feel the silk panties, and spend time and money on his wardrobe, buying his own wig and falsies …. I enjoy the first time a man has mascara put on him, heavy on the eyelids; put lipstick on and it’s slippery on the lips. That’s sensation.

    “It’s the opposite of being desensitized, from where you don’t feel anything to becoming ultrasensitive. It’s like becoming more alive.

    If there were a BDSM lobby, she’d be an influential advocate: “I think I’m doing a service for my clients. I did a lot of introspection before I started doing this professionally. If I was somehow preying on another person’s weakness, I couldn’t sleep at night. I still ask this question (of myself) occasionally, and if I found I was taking advantage of someone, I’d stop doing it.”

    Although the idea of giving the boot to some CEOs and lawyers might be inviting to a lot of people who would otherwise never consider themselves to be into BDSM, Mistress Kali says class distinctions aren’t part of her work: “I have a variety of clients, from blue-collar to corporate. They all get treated the same. They all get my same sneer and haughty attitude. ‘On the floor, you slave!’” she bellows good-naturedly.

    She won’t play the role of a Nazi, though, and with one client, the issue of race became problematic: “I played with a young black man one time, a submissive I met with other people. I had a hard time whipping him. He desperately wanted it, and I couldn’t do it.”

    She has a list of don’ts: no blood, no feces or urine, no permanent scarring, no kissing, no sex. She gives prospective clients a questionnaire on which they indicate their level of interest, zero through five (zero means no interest, five means intense interest), in various activities: affectionate discipline, cock-and-ball torture, face-slapping, humiliation, pony training, smothering, spreader bars, and so on. She’s learned to avoid “someone who’s looking for sex, or someone who has an interest in everything — everything from binding to genital torture to affectionate discipline. Nobody wants it all.”

    She charges $250 an hour. “Clients vary,” she says, “about a half-dozen regulars who come for at least one session every six weeks.” She may see no one for a week, then on another week schedule four sessions. She no longer advertises in the RFT “because there are too many fruitcakes.” There’s an exclusive journal for serious devotees, the Domination Directory International, in which she places the occasional ad.

    The legality of her practice, she says “is debatable.” Prostitution is defined in Missouri as one person providing sexual gratification, with body or an object, to another person for money. “I don’t have sex here. I tell them no sex, no kissing, no hand jobs.” Yet, she admits, “If somebody called the vice squad — I don’t want to think about it. I’d just have to be arrested, have the place dismantled. The worst thing is, my son would find out about this.”

    What occurs during a session varies, depending on the relationship between dominant and submissive. Kali isn’t interested in ritual; she prefers surprise, improvisation, all with a tinge of menace. She prepares herself with a few leg stretches, music. Then, she says, “I’ll get into full costume — the makeup, the clothes — that transforms me mentally into really being ready. I start inventing a scene I want to create, especially if it’s a repeat client and I know him.” With a new client, it’s more a matter of spontaneity, she says. “I like the sense of improvisation, the sense of the unknown.”

    Her clients are men, although in personal play she enjoys women, too: “They’re very responsive.” It’s Kali’s theory that fewer women pay for play because “a man can’t go up to a woman and say, ‘I want to be spanked.’ Women don’t have to pay for kink — it’s too readily available.”

    If Kali’s meeting with a new client, she says, “I have his questionnaire all ready. I don’t like people coming off the street. I want someone to think about it for several days. When they come in, I have them remove all their clothes and put them on a chair in the corner. I meet them in full fetish attire,” so the client is immediately alerted to the fact that he is moving into a very separate theater from the one he performs in daily.

    “I sit with him at my feet, and I put a collar on him. I tell him the rules of the dungeon — no sex. Another rule is my safe word, and they can use it at any time to stop a scene. They have the power to stop it.

    “I go over the questionnaire. I might have specific questions about what is on it and what’s not on it.

    “When here, they refer to me as ‘Mistress.’ They are to speak loudly and clearly. By this time I’ve probably taken them by the collar and paraded them in a big circle, just to help get them in the mindset of being on the floor, naked at my feet. I might have them stomp around on all fours.”

    She’s sure to probe into any medical conditions ahead of time: Are the client’s knees strong? How’s the lower back? The heart? What medications does he take? If there were ever an emergency, she says, “I’d drag them out in the alley and then call 911.”

    Depending on a client’s physical capacities, Kali says, “I may get on their back and have them take me for a horsy ride. I may pull the hair on the back of their head. I slowly dehumanize them. With a new client I would start out very slowly. I might play with some of these things” — she gestures toward an antique travel chest with drawers containing dildos, vibrators, plastic wrap “and other playful items.” She might choose to wear leather gloves. She might force the client to “keep knees and ankles apart, which makes them very vulnerable.

    “Most guys are very visual,” she continues. “Their eyes will follow me around. I’ll take a blindfold: ‘It’s very rude to stare. I’ll put this blindfold on you.’

    “It’s such an individual thing — putting on wrist cuffs and ankle cuffs. I can help someone get into that very submissive state. I don’t do much rope bondage. I enjoy it because it’s very beautiful, but (the clients) are time-sensitive. I have to respect that there’s only so much time they can stay.” Sometimes she’ll recognize there’s only 15 minutes to go, and if the client doesn’t have to be anyplace soon, she’ll tell them, “I’m not finished with you yet.” Then they’re off the clock and on Kali’s time.

    She explains the various implements on her wall display, which features a variety of riding crops and her two favorite whips. Whipping isn’t an activity you can learn in a continuing-ed course. She started “with a man from Chicago who was submissive to me. He gave me my first whip and taught me how to use it. It’s really just a matter of practice.

    “I can draw it across your skin like a butterfly kiss.”

    There’s a leather horse’s bridle for “part of the dehumanization.” She finds these things on travels to larger cities at weekend events, buying from specialty vendors. She shows off a new mink glove with metallic claws hidden in the fur.

    The safety shears are for emergencies. To “cut through anything, to be able to get undone very quickly,” is important. She picks up a metallic object called a Japanese clover clamp, which attaches to the flesh — the nipples, say — and, when pulled, tightens and clasps more firmly.

    There’s a plastic spatula for “scraping off wax.” The salad tongs, or what look like salad tongs, are for “testicle torture.”

    In a basket are spools of veterinary wrap, used to restrain limbs. Kali says it won’t pull hair yet it clings to the skin: “It’s really great. It’s good stuff.”

    The room next door is spare — she uses it for changing — but she’s considering setting up a medical table in there: “I get calls for that. It’s a big fantasy, I want to tell you.” In such scenes, Kali would literally play doctor to the bound, frightened, aroused patient.

    The allure of the exotic paraphernalia can distract from understanding of their purpose, Kali cautions. “There’s so much more to picking up a paddle and spanking someone’s bottom with it,” she says. “I think if people don’t know that, then they don’t understand the communication that goes on between a submissive and a dominant.

    “It’s filling an emotional void. It’s all about emotion to me. Giving up control and allowing yourself to be vulnerable is a very difficult thing to do. To be able to just surrender to another person is refreshing — that’s not a good word — restorative.”

    Her life wouldn’t be very different, she imagines, if she didn’t have to keep her fetish behind closed doors: “I don’t think I would be a different person. I would still be very private, because that’s just who I am. I would have the same friends.” She doesn’t necessarily long for the openness she might enjoy in New York City or the Bay Area.

    She wishes, sometimes, that she could call her sister and tell her how psyched she felt after three days in New York attending whip seminars, or about that former NFL player, who arrived in “6-inch stripper shoes” and a bad wig and then threw a fit because he forgot to put his pocketbook in his purse.

    She’d like to brag about her skills as a businesswoman and about how clients who have tried other prodoms have come back to her, “but I can’t take that chance. So I let my family imagine that I’m an extremely dull person.”

    But she isn’t alone. There are local organizations such as PEP, Leather and Lace, FLOG. The novelty shop Barbdwyr supplies implements and custom-made apparel — and a discreet backdoor through which to enter and exit. A weekend event, Beat Me in St. Louis, is held each spring, filling a local hotel with some 400 participants from Kansas City, Omaha, Chicago and Detroit, as well as country folks from the rural Midwest. For the holidays, Spanksgiving’s coming up.

    Even in conservative St. Louis, people find ways to overcome the stigmas and perceptions: that they are sick, pathetic, the perverse offspring of abusive parents.

    Before she became Mistress Kali, there were years of married life, raising a child, full immersion in the American mainstream.

    But the fantasies of control, the teenage experimentation — those returned to her consciousness like an invitation to a new life.

    “Desire,” she discovered, “doesn’t go away.”