Tag: Music News & Interviews

St. Louis rock band Story of the Year, one of the most well-known locally based acts of the 2000s, has cut ties with bassist Philip “Moon Valjean” Sneed.

The news comes via Sneed’s Instagram account. In a lengthy post, Sneed claims to have learned through the band’s management that he was out. “To be clear, this was not mutual or voluntary on my part,” he writes.

“This isn’t what I’ll choose to remember though,” he continues. “What I will choose to remember, and keep near to my heart, is the FIFTEEN years of sacrifice, dedication, loyalty, fun and hard work that were given to this band and the incredible amount of PEOPLE, experiences, bands, crew, relationships, education and love that was given back to us throughout this amazing ride.”

Story of the Year has confirmed the news though its Twitter account:

@StoryoftheYear is announcing the departure of guitarist/bassist Philip “Moon” Sneed today. He will be dedicating more time to Greek Fire, Goldfinger, and The Rizzuto Show on KPNT, 105.7 The Point. The band wishes Moon well on all of his future endeavors.

— Story of the Year (@StoryoftheYear) March 27, 2018

Sneed had been a member of the group nearly since its inception, joining as rhythm guitarist in 2003 and performing on the group’s breakout album, Page Avenue. He’s performed on every one of the band’s albums, in fact, switching around over the years between guitar, keyboards and bass.

The news comes less than two weeks after Story of the Year announced the return of founding member Adam “the Skull” Russell, who left the group in 2014. This means the band is, so far, still operating as a four-piece, as it has been since Russell initially departed. As of now, all four members of the group are founding members.

Story of the Year is gearing up for an Australian tour in May, in support of its latest album, December’s Wolves. Sneed, meanwhile, joined Goldfinger in 2016, playing lead guitar on July’s The Knife. He also fronts local act Greek Fire and is a radio personality/producer on the Point’s (105.7 FM) morning radio show.

Read Sneed’s full statement below:

It’s with a broken heart that I confirm that Story Of The Year has decided to move on as a band without me. Shortly after performing for two back to back sold out shows I learned, through management, that the band had chosen to do so. To be clear, this was not mutual or voluntary on my part.  This isn’t what I’ll choose to remember though. What I will choose to remember, and keep near to my heart, is the FIFTEEN years of sacrifice, dedication, loyalty, fun and hard work that were given to this band and the incredible amount of PEOPLE, experiences, bands, crew, relationships, education and love that was given back to us throughout this amazing ride.  What I was able to do in my youth is nothing short of an undeserved gift and miracle given to me by each and every fan, friend and supporter of our band over these 15 years. I will forever be in the debt to my fans across the planet!  I now know dozens of personalities, hundreds of names and thousands of people’s faces on a personal level that continue to be a very real and important part of my life and who I am. You all know who you are and my love for you. Do I wish things were different?  Of course. But I will not allow this or anything to sour my now or my future and what is in my control. I wish this could go on forever. I certainly wish it didn’t end like this but I will continue to strive for growth in all of the new chapters of my life. Moving forward, I’ll continue to put my family first and pour my passion and love for music into my other projects. I am living many of my dreams and enjoy being a part of the #1 morning radio show/podcast The @RizzShow on 105.7 The Point. We are also preparing the release of a new @GreekFire record and I’m touring our new @GoldfingerMusic record ‘The Knife’! Life is good. I love you all, across the globe, and I hope to see each one of you soon. In the immortal words of Dr. Peter Venkman… “See you on the other side, Ray.” Moon

A post shared by Moon Valjean (@hereliesmoon) on Mar 27, 2018 at 4:01pm PDT

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Vatterott College, a for-profit career training institute with locations set up all around the Midwest, has removed rapper Nelly’s name from its St. Louis-based music production program, the Ex’treme Institute.

The move comes just one week after an announcement that many of Vatterott’s campuses — including the Ex’treme Institute — are being sold to the Alabama-based Education Corporation of America, the Post-Dispatch reports.

The Ex’treme Institute by Nelly, as it used to be called, was founded in 2011, with the rapper front-and-center, serving as its public face. (The program’s initials “E.I.” happen to comprise the full title of one of the biggest hits off Nelly’s breakout album, 2000’s Country Grammar.)

The decision to part ways was a mutual one.”Nelly and our staff now agree that it is time for the name to change so that students better understand the type of programs the school offers,” Vatterott President Rene Crosswhite says.

While it is true that the program offers much more than training in rap and hip-hop — Nelly himself said at its opening that “hip-hop is just what I do. It doesn’t have to be what you do” — the name change also comes at a time when Nelly, real name Cornell Haynes Jr., is being sued for sexual assault and defamation, leading to some speculation that the college could be deliberately distancing itself from the rapper.

Nelly’s publicist, Juliette Harris, tells RFT that the two matters are unrelated. “This was in the works before any of that happened,” she says, pointing out that the rape charges against Nelly were dropped by prosecutors. She says a change at the top of Vatterott’s leadership was the catalyst for the split.

“The woman that was the former CEO was the reason that Nelly formulated that situation, and she has moved on,” Harris says. “So therefore it was just the best decision for him to move on as well. It was a mutual decision to dissolve the partnership.”

The school will continue training students in music business, production and recording as, simply, the Ex’treme Institute.

As drummer Ted Moll remembers it, when St. Louis band MU330 was at the height of its traveling life, trombone player Gerry Lundquist was in charge of making the mixtapes — he’d put together a fresh set of fifteen or so every time the band headed out of town. Even with that many, a two-month tour meant that those cassettes got plenty of play, the songs burning into the memory banks of all who were in that van, creating a shared vocabulary in the process.

“Now that we’re back on the road,” Moll says, “we almost have our own language, an MU330 band-speak. It’s a combination of the different media we were listening to. Gerry’s tapes were a mix of subversive country from the ’50s, surf, punk — just lots of weird stuff. There were so many favorite lyrics that we just ended up picking up. When we’re relating to each other, speaking to each other, a lot of times it’s through lines from different songs. It all has its own meaning to us and it’s a language that relates to just us. If someone listens in, they’d have no idea what we’re talking about.”

What’s most notable, of course, is that MU330 is back in the game at all, after a stretch of inaction that Moll figures lasted “about two to three years — probably the longest we’d ever gone without playing together.” But now, after a rush of activity at the end of 2015 and into 2016, the band (Moll, Lundquist, his fellow trombone player Rob Bell, bassist Chris Diebold and guitarist/vocalist Dan Potthast) is back, albeit taking on a much less ambitious schedule than in the days when it was a touring machine.

This year, the long-running group has gone out on the road with old friends — first came some dates with Mustard Plug, then a trio with Streetlight Manifesto. From June 15 to 19, the band is heading to the Bay Area for a few sold-out shows in support of the twentieth anniversary of its label, Asian Man Records. And then there’s talk of at least a show or two in St. Louis and Chicago this fall, again tied to anniversaries.

While not parsing out specifics, Moll says, “There were definitely some dark periods where people were going through some issues. It got to the point where some of us didn’t want to deal with it anymore. And we didn’t play for some time.

“But, for whatever reason, it worked out,” he continues. “Whether it was tenacity or understanding or patience or lack of wanting to give it up. I’m sure we were like every band, especially one where there are some big personalities. Definitely there were times where it was a possibility, a real possibility, that we wouldn’t play again. But the fact that we’re where we are today and still friends and relatively healthy people is amazing.”

Though the ska-punk band is not closed to the idea of new music emerging, for now its members have been focusing on making fans happy with the sets that they were playing when their last album, Ultra Panic, was new in stores in 2002. So far, they say, so good.

“I’m kind of in shock,” says Bell, who stays active in the local scene with Suzie Cue and the Wackness. “I’d thought people had forgotten about us. I feel humbled and amazed at how the crowds have appeared and that they still dig us. It makes me want to play more.”

Everything in this round of touring has come organically, Moll says.

“We were offered sets by our friends in Mustard Plug,” he remembers. “There’d be a couple of shows, and we wanted to play them. But Gerry’s health had been a problem for a couple of years. And opening shows is a nice, safe way to test the waters. You can play 30 minutes and see if it’s something you can do. We didn’t want to have an official St. Louis show at first for that very reason, ’cause you’re committing to an hour or a 75-minute show. And if Gerry couldn’t do it, we didn’t want to make the commitment.

“But it worked,” he continues. “Gerry’s so strong. He did great, powered through the whole thing. Our secret show in December was a no-pressure gig, without any real obligation other than to do a few songs and see if we could pull it off.”

That unannounced (but hotly rumored) show took place at a packed Foam, where Potthast was scheduled as a solo act. With word of special plans getting out late, Potthast played some songs, then the band joined for some more. It was a fun homecoming that neatly showed the strength of the ties that still bind the five players.

Potthast, long since relocated to Santa Cruz, California, has been touring solo, with a band (the Bricks) and as side player in recent times. Within the past year, the amiable songwriter has toured the U.S. and Australia; the fact he’s just played dates in Tasmania, Moll says, “is pretty amazing.” The remaining members of the group have wildly differing musical lives, but all four of them still live in St. Louis.

Because of their unusual arrangement, the band’s kicked into a more serious practice schedule of late, even without Potthast on hand.

“Lately, we’ve been rehearsing every weekend” before shows, Moll says. “We were really well-rehearsed for that last set of shows. In the past, doing one or two shows a year, we had the muscle memory — but it’s a matter of getting those muscles back in shape. Especially Chris. I don’t know how he does it; he has to play so fast.”

Bell agrees that the energy the group puts into shows (now an energy being exerted some twenty years after those “psycho ska” songs were written) is a challenge.

“MU330 is the hardest band I’ve ever played in,” he says. “Having to play those songs is quite challenging. Not once, when I’m playing these, does it seem easy.”

Discussing the band’s early days as an opener, Moll suggests that the group has come full circle. In those days they were out to win a crowd over — one there to see the headliner. In opening for Streetlight Manifesto, a group with a hardcore, cult-like following, they again had to win over folks who have never seen them, including a lot of younger fans who struggled to wrap their heads around the fact that the group started gigging in 1989. It was sort of like those old days, blasting mixtapes in the van on the way from town to town.

“That was cool, going back in time and being on tour, selling yourself,” Moll says. “It was like being on tour with the Toasters that first time. Playing to these ska fans, who were only there for the Toasters. It was similar, but this time we’re not trying to find our musical voice. At this point, we’re bringing the complete package.”

Foxing, the St. Louis-based band that hit the big time with its fall release, Dealer, is grappling with questions about a member’s past sexual conduct.

That’s not unusual in and of itself — allegations of wrongdoing in musicians’ private lives are as old as popular music (even Frank Sinatra faced criminal charges back in 1938, for no less than “seduction”). But what is unusual is the band’s response to it: a lengthy, and extremely detailed, open letter on its website not only responds to the allegations, but also includes band leader Josh Coll’s original email response to an anonymous emailer — a response Coll is now calling “sarcastic” and  “snide” and also apologizing for.

According to the band’s statement, the controversy began in 2012 with an incident involving member Ricky Sampson, then 17. Sampson writes that after dinner with a group of friends, he started “messing around” with a girl he was into in his car. That, he writes, “led to my taking off my pants and taking out my penis; she reciprocated for a moment but shortly after she stopped, looked at the clock on my dashboard, and told me she was going to be late for her curfew; I reluctantly obliged and took her home.”

See also: From St. Louis, Foxing Is Taking Over the World

Sampson writes that he continued to text with the girl; it was only a few weeks later, after she’d gotten back together with an ex, that she told Sampson his actions had made her “uncomfortable.”

After that, though, they continued to hang out. So when he later heard that she was still troubled by the incident, he writes, “I was surprised but also figured that someone was mistaken or just hadn’t heard that we had already talked about it. I heard about it right after she had just left my house after watching a movie, so I immediately contacted her and asked her if she would clarify it for people, but she didn’t feel comfortable saying anything. I felt embarrassed and ashamed of myself; a juvenile act had really affected someone I cared for.”

In Foxing’s telling, that’s about all there is to the story — but somehow, the band says, the allegations have gotten increasingly ugly. Over time, the band writes, the incident “has amounted to Ricky now being accused of sexually assaulting a girl he was at one time seeing; some are going as far as calling him a rapist.”

As the band writes,

When we first heard of the story, over three years ago, neither of those terms were attached to it, but the way of the world and the telephone game has created such a behemoth that has gone so far away from the original source. We take these secondhand statements just as seriously as when it was initially brought to our attention and the words and the language were of a completely different nature.

First off we would like to share with you the events; we would prefer to give you as much information as we have on this. Our hope is not to squash, but rather to share a view and open a dialogue. Secondly, this story is his side of the truth and with that we hope that the account is not viewed as, or in any way used as silencing behavior—if you choose to believe his account, please refrain from lashing out at those who do not; it only creates an environment wherein those affected by abuse fear coming forward.

Lastly, we have attempted to reach out to the other party involved in order to allow her to approve this statement and no we will not be naming her, so please respect her anonymity unless she desires to break it on her own accord.

When Coll initially got an anonymous email questioning the band about the incident, he acknowledges, he reacted badly.

He writes,

It is not a valid excuse to say I was on the wrong side of the bed, that I was depressed, that I was tired of writing long emails about the situation, or that I was put off by their attitude before we started emailing—none of that matters. I acted unfavorably and presented that information in a way that made it appear that I didn’t take his inquiries seriously. When I learned that there was an email chain circling, my first thought was ‘God, I hope it wasn’t with that kid that I was really rude to.’ I know that given the loftiness of everything stated above, this is probably such a small blip, but I just wanted to apologize to anyone who read my personal correspondence and was put off by the way I conducted myself.

You can read Coll’s original email exchange with “Anonymous“; the band’s later statement is online here.

In its statement, the band seems intent on showing how seriously they are taking the allegation, even as they suggest it has been badly mischaracterized.

To some this may seem overdue, all we can say is that from our end we believed this was a private matter and the only two individuals involved didn’t want it to be broadcasted. If there is anything we haven’t handled properly in this situation, we are committed to righting our actions and adjusting our behavior in order to make anyone and everyone feel safe.

We know that a lot of our fans are younger and we hope that our experience can serve as a lesson on how not to act. We encourage you to do your own research, I’m sure there are places where this is being talked about—we found a thread on Reddit, which we have linked below. We will be donating a portion of our profits from our current tour to RAINN (https://rainn.org).

We’ve reached out to Sampson. We’ll update this story if we hear back.

In the mean time, feedback on the band’s Facebook page has been strongly positive. “The handling of this situation is a Feminist’s dream. Thank you for refusing to propagate a culture of sexual animosity, and thank you for understanding the emotions and thoughts of the woman involved,” one fan wrote.

Added another, “It takes a lot of maturity to own up to something like that.  Keep your head up guys. The bad publicity will soon fade out.”

We welcome tips and feedback. Email the author at [email protected]

The Ferguson rapper known as Swagg Huncho was killed on Sunday. He was a member of the group 3 Problems, the most vital hip-hop act in St. Louis. “I was looking for him all yesterday,” his groupmate Lil Tay told me on Monday. “We called all the jails, and we finally called the morgue.”

See also: Rapper Swagg Huncho of 3 Problems Shot Dead in St. Louis

Swagg’s real name was James Johnson, Jr. He wouldn’t tell me it at first, so deep was his paranoia, the same one that caused him to drive around rental cars, so people wouldn’t recognize him in the streets. He had reason to be fearful. One of his best friends, Eugene Stubblefield, was killed in January, his body dumped at an abandoned loading dock.

Swagg’s murder also comes on the heels of the September killing of City Stylez, another promising local rapper, who was a bit older and a mentor to 3 Problems. City Stylez left behind five kids and a mountain of bills for his mother.

About the only way to escape death for this distressed demographic, it seems, is through prison, where you’ll find the third member of 3 Problems. His name is Terrell “Rello” Brown Jr., and he’s serving ten years for second degree murder.

The Post-Dispatch’s account of Swagg’s death noted he’s “at least the 186th murder in St. Louis so far this year.” These deaths are so common they’re not even statistics, they’re approximate statistics. But there was nothing anonymous about Swagg. He was strikingly attractive, exuding a bad boy charisma, the kind of guy you whose good graces you wanted to be in. He had a star quality, and 3 Problems had real momentum, with hundreds of thousands of YouTube views for many of their videos. Their most recent mixtape, A Problem Story, was more like a polished debut, and made my top five albums of this year. Their follow-up, Free Rello, was scheduled to come out on Swagg’s nineteenth birthday — his golden birthday, in fact, December 19. Hopefully that will still happen.

See also: Rap Group 3 Problems Could Be St. Louis’ Next Breakout Act. Here Are Their Best Videos

Swagg wasn’t the great musical talent in 3 Problems – that was Lil Tay, who lived and breathed hip-hop. But Swagg was the leader of the group, the one who guided interviews and helped craft their image. (He also wrote many of their lyrics.) He had lots of fans. People asked him and Lil Tay to take pictures at the Michael Brown protests last year. Girls were after him, as were many others with sketchy intentions, convinced his relative local fame meant he had money and favors to dispense.

Across his right forearm, his tattoo read “Loyalty First,” and he tried to stick with those he knew, both for personal safety and because of his deep love for his friends and family, which often amounted to one and the same. He had two young daughters. His groupmates were his first cousins (their mothers are sisters in their 30s), and Stubblefield’s mom was Swagg’s mother’s best friend.

You can hear my conversation with Swagg and Lil Tay about the departed Stubblefield in the video below. We spoke in February at the loading dock where his body was found. They called Stubblefield a “brother” and, though he wasn’t actually in the group, a “problem,” which was a compliment. Note the tattoos to honor him across their jugulars, and how, at the :30 mark, Swagg breaks out of the conversation and into a profane rhyme, about trust. The compelling yet sinister rap sums him up in a nutshell, hinting both at his talent and his darkness.

But he could be funny and warm too. He invited me to smoke weed shortly after we first met, after we had lunch at the restaurant of his choice. (Hooter’s – I declined). At the Mel Carnahan courthouse downtown for Rello’s sentencing, he slipped his hand up inside a vending machine to steal a bag of Red Hot Riplets for his cousin.

Certainly, he didn’t always live within the law. He was arrested in late October, charged with drug possession and resisting arrest. And he was always very clear to emphasize just how real the group’s songs were. But though the tracks played up the group’s street bona fides and their ruthlessness, they also portrayed a pair of struggling kids trapped in a horrible situation. As their characters explain on “Come Around,” they rob folks not because they get a thrill, but because they’re broke. They slang dope because no one’s hiring.

It was easy to imagine that, with the group’s burgeoning fame, Swagg would be able to transition into an above-board life. After the Rolling Stone story, the guys got some good clips, and were making decent money doing guest verses on tracks from other local rappers. They put on shows, filmed videos, and their fan base was blooming. Their close associate LA4SS was even closer to breaking out, and his success would have only boosted theirs.

But the idea that you can leave your past behind is probably a fantasy. I don’t pretend to know what Swagg was doing late at night, running around the city. And there may be those who knew him as a menace, rather than a target.

But ultimately he’s like those approximately 186 others – a victim. Of poverty, of hopelessness, of a reckless gun control policy, of nobody giving a fuck. He did his best to survive within the system he was born into. Any idiot commenters who believe he got what he deserved (based on his lyrics) should realize that he just wanted what we all want: A little money in his pockets, a little shine. He showed off his guns because he didn’t want to be attacked.

Thankfully he left behind a body of work. With a little exploration, it will tell you not just his story, but help you understand better an entire generation of young black men from North St. Louis County. That’s his legacy, and it’s more than most of us accomplish by our nineteenth birthdays.

As of press time, there have been no arrests made in the killing of Swagg Huncho, nor in the January murder of his friend Eugene Stubblefield.

From art to automobiles, electronics to fashion, U.S. culture is full of Japanese exports. As the scores of Japanese cultural exports now popular in the U.S. have taken hold, Americans have assigned each to one of two broad categories in our cultural hierarchy. To put it in terms of Lawrence Levine’s (antiquated) dichotomy, there are those few which American audiences consider decidedly “highbrow” — Kurosawa films and sushi, for instance — and then there are the droves relegated to a place alongside McDonald’s and Spam as signifiers of baseness and vulgarity — in other words, the “lowbrow.”

In that second category, in company with the likes of Power Rangers, instant ramen, and Most Extreme Elimination Challenge, is the now-ubiquitous pastime of karaoke. Since its introduction to U.S. audiences sometime in the early 1980s, karaoke (which literally translates to “empty orchestra,” referring the vocal-less recordings with which participants sing) has become a cultural phenomenon of its own in drinking establishments all over the U.S.

For those of you who just can’t resist the urge to give the crowd your best Whitney Houston after a few drinks, here are the bars that’ll help you quench your thirst for karaoke, no matter what night of the week.

See also: Five St. Louis Karaoke Bars in Five Days: The Diary of a Sing-Along Addict

Monday:

You’re only one day into the work week, but hey, that’s no excuse not to go out and give those pipes a workout. If you’ve got a song inside that just needs to get out, you’ve got three options in town for Monday night karaoke. South City karaoke fiends can head out to Cotter’s Sports Bar (4610 South Kingshighway Boulevard; 314-351-5058). If Dogtown or Clifton Heights is where you reside, you can hit up Mike Talayna’s Juke Box Restaurant (1115 Hampton Avenue; 314-647-7600). Or, if you happen to be a bit further west, Double D Lounge (1740 South Brentwood Boulevard; 314-961-5646) has got you covered when it comes to Monday night karaoke in the Maplewood/Richmond Heights/Brentwood area.

Tuesday:

Tuesday nights add one to the list of potential karaoke crime scenes. In addition to Mike Talayna’s and the Double D Lounge, Just John (4112 Manchester Avenue; 314-371-1333) brings karaoke to the Grove, and the Crack Fox (1114 Olive Street; 314-621-6900) ensures that Downtown doesn’t miss out on its share of botched lyrics and questionable renditions.

Wednesday:

As hump-day arrives, the Double D Lounge and Mike Talayna’s prove themselves as St. Louis’s standard-bearers of St. Louis’s karaoke culture. Joining them for some mid-week mangling of your favorite songs are Bevo Mill’s Luna Lounge (4561 Gravois Avenue; 314-481-5862), and another night of clumsy crooning on in Southtown at Cotter’s.

Thursday:

On Thursday nights, Double D Lounge on Brentwood and Mike Talayna’s on Hampton both host their fourth weekly night of karaoke, while Just John on Manchester goes in for their second and final karaoke night of the week. Soulard also gets a little karaoke love on Thursday nights thanks to Carson’s Sports Bar (1712 South Ninth Street; 314-436-2707).

Friday:

Unsurprisingly, the options for karaoke and cocktails open up significantly once the weekend arrives. In addition to another night of bungled belting at Luna Lounge, Mike Talayna’s, Double D Lounge, Carson’s Sports Bar and Cotter’s Sports Bar, a couple weekend warriors of karaoke join the fray. The RFT’s 2011 pick for “Best Karaoke,” the One-Nite Stand (2800 Ohio Avenue; 314-766-0996) hosts its first of two weekly karaoke nights at their divey location at Gravois and Ohio, as does the popular Central West End hang, Tom’s Bar and Grill (20 South Euclid Avenue; 314-367-4900).

Saturday:

Saturday nights are likewise rife with opportunities for sauced singing all around town. The One-Nite Stand and Tom’s each host their second and final karaoke night of the week, while Carson’s, Double D Lounge, and Cotter’s all wrap up a longer week of karaoke with some Saturday night celebration.

Sunday:

The week’s end has arrived, but if you still haven’t gotten your fill of amateurs intoning their favorite tunes, you’ll have to head to the one remaining karaoke night of the week, at the delightfully weird Mike Talayna’s Juke Box Restaurant on Hampton.

And the Winners Are:

When it comes to karaoke, everyone’s a winner, but when it comes to bringing karaoke to St. Louis’s vibrant amateur vocalists, there are two clear winners. Hosting karaoke every single night of the week, Mike Talayna’s Juke Box Restaurant (Mike Talayna’s Juke Box Restaurant (1115 Hampton Avenue; 314-647-7600) is a sure-shot for karaoke pretty much whenever the desire hits. Coming in at a close second is Brentwood’s Double D Lounge (1740 South Brentwood Boulevard; 314-961-5646), which offers karaoke Monday-Saturday, but takes a sonic Sabbath on Sunday, if only to rest up for more on Monday night.

The newest statistics out of psychology studies report that one percent of the general population are psychopaths. With numbers that high, you probably know a psychopath, have dated a psychopath or are actually a psychopath yourself.

Psychopathy is “traditionally defined as a personality disorder characterized by enduring antisocial behavior, diminished empathy and remorse, and disinhibited and bold behavior.”

Psychopaths (and sociopaths) fall under the diagnostic umbrella of “antisocial personality disorder.” Traits of those with antisocial personality disorders vary: They are not all serial killers and criminals. A psychopath is just as likely to be an accountant as he/she is to be a Ted Bundy-type.

Using a combination of the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), Robert D. Hare’s famous Psychopathy Checklist (PCL-R) and various psychology articles, we’ve made a list of the traits of a psychopath. We posit that they might apply to international pop star Taylor Swift.

See also: Taylor Swift Is Destroying America

Why? Well, Taylor Swift exhibits a multitude of behaviors that are in line with a diagnosis of psychopathy. She’s the most ambitious blonde since our lady Madonna, and like Madonna she’s turned herself into a holier-than-thou media monster hell-bent on presenting perfection. This rubs many observers the wrong way. Basically, tons of people think that she’s become the music industry version of Anne Hathaway: attractive, talented, hard-working and helplessly annoying.

We have a special interest in Swift and psychology, so here we examine the traits of the psychopath and explore how they might relate to Taylor Swift.

Psychopaths exhibit glib or superficial charm and often have disarming personalities.
Taylor Swift wants everyone to feel like they are her best friend. Just try to be in a room with her without Swift offering to pose for a selfie with you. She seems perpetually “on” in a way that is unnatural and Robin Williams-like. With a constant media spotlight on her life, even her bad days seem Truman Show manufactured. She charms everyone from babies to the elderly with ease and looks like a Barbie while she does it. Creepy.

Psychopaths learn to mimic and display false emotion to hide their lack of empathy and genuine human connections.
She does this so much. Just click this link.

Psychopaths are often wildly successful.
Even Swift’s seemingly altruistic moves are self-profit motivated. Last year she published an essay in the Wall Street Journal about the value of artists and their work. Just a few months later she pulled her entire catalog from Spotify. The executives at Spotify publicly begged for her to come back, but T-Swizz wasn’t having it. So what happened after that? Her latest album, 1989, hit record sales numbers. She sold 1.28 million copies during the first week alone. Why? Because kids actually paid for it instead of just streaming it. The psycho is a genius.

Psychopaths are highly adaptable and often extremely intelligent.
Just this week Ryan Adams released an album that exclusively features track-by-track cover versions of Swift’s latest album, but done in the style of the Smiths. Taylor Smiths? Bet she had to look up the Manchester mopes. Seriously, do you think that Taylor Swift has ever spent even one night sitting all dour in her bedroom and listening to the Smiths or the maudlin music of the university station? No way. But guess whose music is available on Spotify? Ryan “MySpace Hair” Adams. That means that Swift is still getting a check from Spotify and other streaming services. Clever girl.

Psychopaths can easily influence or manipulate others.
A few months ago Ms. Swift wrote yet another note and convinced one of the most powerful corporations in the world to change its streaming policy in favor of “young songwriters” and cash-poor indie artists. Apple knows better than to question Queen T and they acquiesced immediately.

Psychopaths appear to be much more humble than the average person.
Despite being one of the most successful pop stars ever, Taylor Swift constantly portrays herself as a victim, a nerd or as the underdog. (See “You Belong With Me” video and lyrics.) This is a move that makes psychopaths seem less threatening so that they can actually become more powerful. Swift has been pushing this platform since the very beginning of her career, expressing in interviews that her classmates hated her, boys hate her, other performers hate her. All of that might be true (and maybe many are just a bit jealous) but if they view her poorly it’s not because she’s a nerdy victim. She’s been a powerhouse for almost a decade and she is absolutely, in no possible way an underdog. Don’t let her trick you into thinking otherwise.

Psychopaths disregard laws, believing that rules don’t apply to them.
If you or I tried to perform at Rockefeller Plaza, we’d promptly be arrested. Taylor Swift doesn’t care. She just brings in her whole stage and causes a serious disturbance. She probably didn’t even get a ticket.

Psychopaths have many short-term relationships.
Slut-shaming young women is bogus, so let’s just skip this one. You’ve probably already drawn your own conclusions on this topic, anyway.

Psychopaths have behavioral problems during childhood.
Swift’s family relocated to Nashville when she was fourteen so that she could pursue her dream of becoming a country star. But what if her family hadn’t gone for this plan? Can you imagine the intensity of a teenage Tay-Tay tantrum? Yikes.

Psychopaths have a tendency to display violent behavior.
Watch the “Blank Space” video.

Psychopaths are pathological liars and enjoy the thrill that comes from fooling people.
That video for “Blank Space” is actually Taylor Swift coming out as a psychopath. Are we so blind as to miss that? She must feel pretty smug for having waved it in our faces and we just obliviously sang along. Take note of these lyrics:
– “Love’s a game / Want to play?”
– “Got a long list of ex-lovers / They’ll tell you I’m insane”
– “Find out what you want / Be that girl for a month”
– “I can make all the tables turn”
– “Boys only want love if it’s torture / Don’t say I didn’t… warn you”
– “Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream”

Continue to page two for more.